Day the Ten-and-Sixth of the Ninth Moon, Year Two Thousand Eight and Ten
Neath the smoldering moon of Te-Xas, athwart mighty hills and rolling dales, the banners of the men of Columbus did gaily flutter. Atop their steeds the knights of the Order of Ohio and their leader, the cunning general Lord Ryan of Day, marched upon the dun fens where could be found the wily and savage Frog-men. The reasons for the war with the Frog-men have long since faded to oblivion, scattered like dust in the annals of history. Whatever the cause of the enmity between Columbus and Te-Xas (some believe t'was the perfidy of the ribald Thomas of Hermanshire), the battle betwixt the two armies was a glorious and spectacular bout of arms.
The armies of Columbus did arrive less than entirely prepared. Amongst their ranks: the stout Sir Bosa the Younger, Sir Chase the Even Younger than Bosa, Sir Haskins of the Strong Arm, Sir Mack of the Ever-Butter'd-Hands, Sir Jones of the Large Appetite, and Sir Jordan of the Absurdly-Low-Snap. The Frog-Men, led by their ancient and savage warchief, Garrut of Pattuhsahn (pronounc'd Gerrold of Patterson, by civilized tongues) did rise from the muck and mire of their breeding fens to encircle and torment the men of Columbus, who were caught much unawares. The alacrity and vigour with which the Frog-Men pounced, armed with tridents, nets, whips, and slings of leaden stone, did much upset and dismay the Columbian Knights, who had not seen such swiftness and bestial fury even from the Oregonian Beavermen.
The battle left many brave knights wounded, including the valiant Sir Bosa the Younger and Sir Sheffield of the Very-Chiseled-Abdomen. The aforementioned Sir Mack of the Ever-Butter'd-Hands did miss with his lance the heart of one of the Frog-Men chieftians, a consequence of his hands which were ever butter'd. Had he laid low the chieftian, the battle may have been won there. Instead, led by Lord Ryan of Day and Sir Haskins, the men of Columbus retreated to the safety of the withered hills, carrying the wounded Sir Bosa upon his shield.
Had the Frog-Men contented themselves with this victory, they may have well seen the backfoot of their foe. However t'was the greed and battle-lust of warchief Garrut--who had croaked until he could croak no more, so antediluvian and strain'd were his vocal chords--that impelled the Frog-Men to pursue the men of Columbus beyond the succor afforded them by their homely fens, and onto the dry land and rais'd ground of the hills where the Knights of Columbus and their great bows of yew would be the superior. On the hills the Frog-Men found no purchase. With their greatest warrior Sir Bosa laid low, the men-at-arms rallied, Sir Jones of the Large Appetite did slay not one but two Frog-Man chieftians. Under the leadership of Sirs Haskins and Campbell, archers rained down volleys of poison'd and fir'd arrows upon the Frog-Men's heads, until the Frog-Men were leaping over the corpses of their brothers.
For six hours did the men of Columbus withstand the onslaught, until at last the tide broke, and the Frog-Men retreated. Knowing that there would be nothing of value to pillage from the low fens, Lord Ryan of Day chose not to pursue them, relieved to have won the day.
Honor satisfied, their pennants rising high, the men of Columbus turned from Te-Xas toward their homes in Ohio. Early into their return journey, their spirits were lifted even more by tremendous news: Lord Urban of Meyer had left his tower, the curse finally lift'd. The mighty warriors of Columbus would now turn their attention to a new foe: the infamous brigands of Tulanus.
