So, quick disclaimer, I wasn't able to watch the game because I was working on Saturday afternoon, but I was able to follow along the stats and overall progression of the game, plus I've read one or two recaps.

September 24th, Year of Our Lord Two Thousand and Seventeen

Dearest Shelley,

I write to you from the spartan comfort of my field tent, for while the battle has been won, there is still as of yet business to attend to, the nature of which I will soon make clear.

You may be heartened to know that our casualties were light in the recent clash with the rebels of the Las Vegas wastes. It has been made known to me that long before they ever reached our green country, they had become completely dispirited and debilitated by all manner of diseases and malnutrition. Dysentery, scurvy, gangrene, and the most perfidious and pernicious of illnesses, that one that inhabits the human mind itself: hopelessness. When the rebels arrived at our proverbial gates, they were already waving their white flags, offering complete and total surrender in exchange for medical supplies and rations.

But the men of Columbus were too brave to accept their surrender, and fell upon the rabble with a fury that would shiver even the legions of hell.

To give you a complete and thorough report of the events of the battle--if indeed it could be called as such--would be a needless extravagance and serve only to glorify what must now be seen as a slaughter, the driving of sheep into the maws of the wolves. Suffice it to say that my senior officers such as Colonels Wilson and Schiano and more integral junior officers such as Captain Barrett and Lieutenant Haskins conducted themselves admirably.

However not all of our soldiers fulfilled their duties to my satisfaction. Ill-discipline and inefficiency plagued our rearguard, particularly young Corporal Sheffield, whose poor positioning allowed numerous rebels to escape to the countryside, where they may well turn to brigandage to fill their bellies at the expense of our civilians (I have been told that the nearby House of Waffles has already posted a detachment of armed guards to secure their trove of hashbrowns). While he was not the only guilty party, Sheffield's incompetence was the most marked, and thus I must make an example of him.

I have not yet decided how I shall do that, although I have many choices. It could be anything as severe as summary execution, or as light as a formal apology and a promise to do better in the future.

In any case, I must make my decision soon, for now is the time to begin preparations for our next campaign to the east, to the land of New Jersey--a hellish kingdom by the sea, a land of disease and depredation. There, my traitorous former adjutant General Ash has set himself up as a warlord of sorts. May God have mercy on him and his men, for we shall show none.

Yours forever,

General Urban Francis Meyer