It's Monday, but Buff Tommy Schutt (pictured above) is here to guide you through the day. You can thank me after the sun sets on his bicep — and not a second before.
I LOVE THE UNKOWN!!! So, this happened last night:
So... pic.twitter.com/KB97DqGwUV
— Eleven Warriors (@11W) April 13, 2015
Here's a free lesson for corporations denying reports: Use the "100" emoji in your denial. It makes it 100x times stronger.
I think, however, I've hit the point where I unironically believe D'Angelo Russell is coming back. (Fight me if you want to.) The season has been over for three weeks, and what's the point in delaying a decision everyone expected?
If I'm wrong and I've been manipulated by a #teen... then so be it. #Teens are some of our society's most powerful mystics. There is no shame in being duped by a #teen mystic.
NOBODY SAW LEE COMING. When Darron Lee is taxing people next year, try and remember that not even Urban Meyer saw it coming.
From Scout.com's article on OSU linebacker development:
We had him as a four-star recruit coming out of high school, but nobody saw this coming. Lee took over for first round pick Ryan Shazier, and was just as impactful, maybe better. Luke Fickell deserves a ton of credit for pounding the table for Urban Meyer to take Lee. He saw that a 190-pound quarterback/safety could add 30 pounds and be a great linebacker. I never saw Lee able to get this big, and keep his speed and athleticism. I saw him as a safety. If you take ten kids like this, maybe one pans out this way. This was the one that defied logic, and Darron Lee is probably on his way to being an All-American and first round pick one day. All this from a kid that basically begged for an Ohio State offer. This is a Cinderella story indeed, and couldn't happen to a nicer kid.
Make no mistake: It's always nice to haul a five-star gem down from the skies, but I'd rather cheer for a team full of developed three-stars. (Yes, I'll defer to Urban Meyer until I'm anointed as OSU's coach.)
WATCH PAUL FINEBAUM CRY. Watch the Sugar Bowl like never before, via Remy/Buckny/Silky Johnson:
(Remy gathered the segments over here.)
Honestly, the Sugar Bowl was a more satisfying victory than the national title game. Hell, the Sugar Bowl was the most satisfying victory since Ohio State's 2002 national title win over Miami. (Yes, children, Miami [FL] used to be terrifyingly good at football. I know, I know: History is wild.)
LACROSSE CAPTURES CREATOR'S TROPHY. Congratulations to the men's lacrosse team:
Champs! With the win at UM today, Ohio State claimed the Creator's Trophy for the second time. #GoBucks pic.twitter.com/Mh7O6WYy9a
— Ohio State Men's LAX (@OhioState_MLAX) April 12, 2015
Is your next question, "What in the hell is the Creator's Trophy?" Don't worry, that was mine as well. From 2012 on InsideLacrosse.com:
UNIVERSITY PARK, Pa. — Penn State men’s lacrosse head coach Jeff Tambroni announced in conjunction with his counterparts at Michigan (John Paul) and Ohio State (Nick Myers) the establishment of the Creator's Trophy, which will be an annual award among the three Big Ten schools that sponsor men's lacrosse.
A team that earns a 2-0 record against the other programs will take ownership of the trophy each spring and have its name and the year inscribed. If all teams earn a 1-1 record then no team or year will be recorded on the trophy and it will reside with the most recent team to win it outright. Following each game, a player of the game from the winning team will be selected.
Workers of the world! Instead of work, report to the bar. When your boss calls, tell him/her you're at a bar celebrating Ohio State's Creator's Trophy victory. If they don't understand that then they're not a boss worth toiling for.
HAPPY TRAILS, DR LOU. FourLokos in the air, y'all!!!! Dr. Lou deserves nothing but our finest 21-Loko salute.
From Richard Dietsch of SportsIllustrated.com:
SI.com learned over the weekend that ESPN has parted ways with Lou Holtz, who had been a college football studio analyst with the network since 2004 and worked most notably with host Rece Davis and analyst Mark May on ESPN’sSaturday College Football Final pregame, halftime and postgame studio coverage. Holtz was also a regular contributor to SportsCenter and ESPN Radio. The decision, according to sources, was closer to a mutual agreement between the parties than Holtz getting forced out. The 78-year-old said last May that he would retire from broadcasting after the 2014 season though at the time the network said Holtz had not informed them of such thinking.
So long, Lou! We'll always have the time you spoke Elvish on ESPN:
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