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Worst coach in the Big Ten?



dwiz0918's picture

 Bret "Shlitz sweating, cheese reeking" Bielema is worse than anyone. Just listening to him spout out smug, passive-aggressive jibberish from his bulldog-like jowles just gives me indigestion.

AGL's picture

+1, also Kirk "coy"


NoVA Buckeye's picture

He's taking all the credit for what Alvarez built.

The offseason begins when your season ends. Even then there are no days off.

larzdapunk's picture

Blows my mind to try to pick the worst from this bunch. 
Ferentz:  Worst coach in his salary bracket
Beckman: Worst new B1G coach
Hope:  Worst coach with the best 'stache
Wilson: Worst offensive-defensive balance coach
Hoke:  Worst coach for the most obvious reason

johnblairgobucks's picture

Hope:  Worst coach with the best 'stache

That is a "stache?  I thought someone had mistakenly stapled a broom to his lip.

NoVA Buckeye's picture

Don't knock the 'stache.

The offseason begins when your season ends. Even then there are no days off.

CALPOPPY's picture

If it looks like someone stapled a broom to your lip, your 'stache is, indeed, a winner. Not just any man can do that. He may whine like a baby about holding, but his 'stache has to apologize to no one.

I'm a hurtin' buckaroo.

Johnny Ginter's picture

what's ultimately really sad about the big ten is that i still believe that the midwest is fertile football territory, and the B1G has the potential to be good, but holy good lord at least half the coaches in this conference suck complete ass

William's picture

Oh the Midwest has plenty of football talent, plenty. However when you have crappy coaches it doesn't matter how much talent you bring in. Shining examples of this are Ron Zook and Charlie Weis. The Big Ten, which is the richest conference in the country by far needs to shell out some cash for better coaches. 

buckeyefanatic's picture

I've felt like our future future was on the downhill for a while.  Dwindling populations, rustbelt workforce taking a dump, more attractive destinations to the south ... seems like we've got an uphill battle on our hands in the future.

How many batteries does it take to beat Michigan football?   1AA
Want to beat Michigan? There's an App for that.

William's picture

Except that the North still has more people, and that the Rustbelt isn't suffering like people make it out to be, or at least in regards to the Deep South. When did Tuscaloosa, Alabama suddenly become an 'attractive destination'?

BoFuquel's picture

The Bielamonster no contest.9-0 GO BUCKS!

I wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then.

buckeyedude's picture

I went with Choke because I couldn't stand the way the Michelin fans up here in NW Ohio were fawning over him last year like he's Bo Schembechler reincarnate. He had the favorable schedule last year. Not so much this year and you can see the difference.
Isn't this Tim Beckman's first year? I can't recall. I think he needs to be cut a little slack.
Even if it's year 2, that's going to be a difficult task to turn the Illini program around.



AeroBuckeye2001's picture

Agree, Beckman is a good coach with an OSU pedigree (in his first year). I think he'll have Illinois competitive in a few years.

The Ohio State University Class of 2001

BS Aero & Astronautical Engineering

NoVA Buckeye's picture

He has to De-Zooker the program before they can be successful.

The offseason begins when your season ends. Even then there are no days off.

buckeye76BHop's picture

Hoke only because he won games last year and now I think people are seeing what they have or should I say, don't have behind Denard.  Once this year's over, everyone will see what I mean.  Shane Morris won't be their savior...he has a hand cannon but isn't accurate as many think he'll be (especially as a once he gets may be a different story).  

"There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you."

"I love football. I think it is most wonderful game in world and I despise to lose."

Woody Hayes 1913 - 1987 

MVJ's picture

Hoke - because he doesn't even wear headphones during the game. I call that "getting a free sideline pass to every M*chigan game of the season."

"You win with people "

bleedscarletpissmaize's picture

I heard he doesnt like to wear the headset because it leaves a line in his hair.

CALPOPPY's picture

No, I heard it makes him sweat even that much more. And Jabba-the-Hoke doesn't need any help in that department. Otherwise, how's he gonna get the fine casino ladies like Bielema.

I'm a hurtin' buckaroo.

sir rickithda3rd's picture

bielemma cant wait til the boys hang 40 on them

mark may wins douchebag of the year... again

Nkohl13's picture

Bret " needs a transfer qb " Bielema

Joe Beale's picture

It has to be Ferentz. Beckman is new and Wilson has actually improved his program as has Hoke (although, screw that guy). But Ferentz has no excuse for fielding such a bad team after mediocre seasons the last two years. Time for the Iowa administration to upgrade the program and invest in a big-time coach. That fan base deserves better.

45OH4IO's picture

Yeah these results are (slightly) skewed based on the population hahaha! I mean, based on record, (lack of) recruiting, etc, etc. it has to be The Ferret.
but screw that guy!

onetwentyeight's picture

Ferentz in the "bang for the buck" underachievement department, probably Tim Beckman in general (Illinois is criminally bad). BUT I voted Hoke anyways.
Just Because. 

nickma71's picture

While I don't like that fat d-bag from up north, he isn't a bad coach. In fact, if Tressel did what he did on offense, Tressel probably would have one a few more than he did. Which was a lot. Like 3rd and 4 Nebraska sold out on the run and Michigan passed. Thankfully, they don't have a quarterback capable of completing a pass, so the blackskirts got lucky. Just like Stoneburners TD. It isn't that hard. If the safeties come up to cover the run, the middle is open for a big gain, or even 6. I don't know why it is so hard to see that. Beckman might be for agreeing to coach Illinois. But other than that...

CALPOPPY's picture

Your proposed scenario could be looked at another way, though. I think they sold out on the run because Michigan has criminally bad passing.

I'm a hurtin' buckaroo.

nickma71's picture

Oh, they have no pass game alright. That isn't the point. Change the play and pass when the defense is clearly on a run blitz. Or just dial up a pass in the huddle. It doesn't have to be a bomb. Something Tressel tried sometimes. It is "easy" to complete an 11 yard pass when the safties are not in coverage compared to a 45 yard pass at full speed.
And now that I think about it, Ferentz is over rated. He kept getting coach of the year, and not winning the Big Ten. He had all Big Ten players and didn't win the Big 10. If he is such a good coach, and his players are so good, why do they not win the confrence? Tressel was a worse coach with worse players, but dropped them most of the time. 2004 was the loss year if I remember. Which is the only loss I have seen to the hog farmers in my lifetime.
And as mentioned, the real worst coach is Bielema. He inherited a strong program that developed great lineman (just like Tom Osborne), and he is turning them into shambles. Rick Neuhisal is the same way. Wherever he goes, he brings destruction to your program.

daytonbuckeye's picture

I was seriously contemplating every coach up until I got to Hoke and it was a done deal. Why did I vote Hoke the worst coach? Because I couldn't vote for 3!

3 85 yards and a cloud of dust.

sloopy88's picture

Yep, the reasoning of "because screw that guy" is sound as far as I'm concerned. 

lamplighter's picture

Brady "where's the buffet table" Hoke -- with Bret a close 2-
I agree with Beckman - give him a year or two to make the call.
TTUN will end up with a winning season, but they had a lot of luck last year and the Holiday Bowl won't seem as much fun. 

el duderino's picture

I was somewhat surprised that Bret "stay-puffed" Bielema wasn't included as a named option on this list.
That said, Ferentz has to be the worst for his consistently inconsistent teams. And his heinously oversized salary.

"This is a very complicated case: a lot of ins, lot of outs, lot of what-have-yous."

Bucksfan's picture

Where's the All of the Above option?

johnblairgobucks's picture

seems more than a few Michig*n fans are thinking Hoke should win this poll.
Scout forum Stadium and Main: Big Picture- Hoke

Poison nuts's picture

Well - there are a few coaches to choose from for sure - but Hoke really shat the bed last night..

"Do not pass me, just slow down - I can move right through you" Superchunk - Precision Auto.

Doc's picture

I voted for Flounder Hoke, because screw that guy!  It was a perfect ending to the evening last night watching AACC poop themselves at Brasky.  Here's to more pants pooping, the Saturday after Thanksgiving!

I'm hiding baby and I'm dreaming
I'm riding down your moonlight mile

OSUBias's picture

Jerry Kill. Decent MAC coach, cannot compete at this level.

Shitter's full

NoVA Buckeye's picture

Because winning at the Big Ten level is too hard.

The offseason begins when your season ends. Even then there are no days off.

NC_Buckeye's picture

See me after the 2014 season. Then I'll tell you if you were right or not.
I have a feeling that Kill is the best recently-added coach to the B1G not named Meyer or O'Brien.

mclovin's picture

My vote will always be for Hoke, but personal feelings aside, it has to be Ferentz.  That guy is raking in the big bucks and for what?  Seems like the only time you hear about Iowa anymore is that one of their best players is transferring to another school.  Iowa went from being in the discussion as a top tier Big Ten team to joining the ranks of Purdue and Indiana.  Hoke and Beckman are too new to really judge.  Hope coaches Purdue and we don't have any room to trash him considering how he has been a thorn in our side.  And the Indiana guy seems to be getting things on track as well.  Ferentz all the way but Hoke sucks the hardest.

NoVA Buckeye's picture

He brings home the hardware year in and year out. Why wouldn't anyone like Ferentz? GREATEST COACH EVER!!!!!

The offseason begins when your season ends. Even then there are no days off.

NoVA Buckeye's picture

Ferentz shouldn't be on this list. He's the greatest coach ever and you know it.

The offseason begins when your season ends. Even then there are no days off.

Buckeyes125's picture

Hoke - He doesn't wear a headset....