Anything Else Forum

Anything Else Forum

Offtopicland. This still isn't the place to discuss politics, religion, or hot-button social issues, however.

An Ode to the Beast

Jason Priestas's picture
May 3, 2014 at 11:54pm

Fun read on the world's greatest roller coaster:

The rickety, brown monster rose vertiginously through the trees. It looked like the Hells Angels had kidnapped Amish barn builders and forced them to erect a shrine of suicidal madness. By the time we reached the boarding station and I towered over Scooby, red cars returned with their shellshocked passengers. I felt the impulse to marry Scooby, to begin a life together on the platform where we would never separate. The teenage conductor grunted. “Chris, come on,” Heather snapped. I belted myself in, my knees nowhere close to touching the bar that was supposed to lock me in place. I just had time to say, “I don’t want to,” before the ride rocked forward.

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Rocket Man's picture

That's a great read. Diamondback, Flight of Fear, Firehawk, Banshee, etc -- all fantastic.  But the Beast is still the best at Kings Island.

I didn't go to engineering school to be a 'people person'

+2 HS
Poison nuts's picture

I want to say that growing up & to this day, The Beast is my favorite roller coaster! I have ridden a lot of them & there is something about that wooden behemoth that no other ride can compare to...

"Do not pass me, just slow down - I can move right through you" Superchunk - Precision Auto.

+3 HS
Horvath22's picture

I'm still a Cedar Point and Millenium guy.

+2 HS
krodawg's picture

Lived in Northern and Central Ohio for 15 years and never made it down to Kings Island. Always spent my amusement park dollars at Cedar Point. Gotta get this on my list.

Jason Priestas's picture

One of the joys of growing up in Columbus is that you get to hit both Cedar Point and Kings Island on the regular. Overall, I think Cedar Point has better coasters (and the location kills Kings Island's), but man, the Beast is the granddaddy of 'em all.

KBonay's picture

I can't shake the memory of a family friend asking my mom if she was going to ride The Beast & my dad's reply:  'She rode the beast last night'

+2 HS