Skull Session: Brian Hartline Spurns NFL Teams, Cardale Jones is the King of the XFL, and a Buckeye Fan (Almost) Never Misses a Game

By Kevin Harrish on February 11, 2020 at 4:59 am
The youngins are taking the field in today's skull session.

We're another day towards Buckeye football, or death. Whichever hits us first.

Eat at Arby's.

Word of the Day: Imbue.

 CHOOSING COLUMBUS. We all knew there would come a time that Brian Hartline would have to make a tough decision about his future in Columbus, but what we didn't know is that he already has – multiple times.

USC OC Graham Harrell was one college coach the Eagles looked at hiring in January. Here’s another: Ohio State receivers coach Brian Hartline. Philly pursued the ex-NFL receiver to help with the team’s passing game and coach its wideouts, which is another sign of how the Eagles looked at trying to add some outside-the-NFL influence to their mix. Hartline wound up deciding to remain in Columbus in 2020, but Philly wasn’t the only team to show interest in this rising coaching star, and this isn’t the first year it’s happened. The Colts, for one, looked hard at Hartline a couple years ago, too.

I took it with an extreme grain of salt when he said he had "no desire" to leave Ohio State, because that can always change when someone gives him a couple million reasons to go elsewhere.

But after hearing that, I'm now significantly more optimistic that coaching receivers in Columbus might actually just be his favorite thing and he genuinely plans to do it for a very long time.

That's bad news for college football, but great news for every five-star teen receiver making a college decision.

 THE XFL GIVETH, THE XFL TAKETH AWAY. The XFL was extremely kind to one Buckeye over the weekend, but not so kind to the other.

Cardale Jones received a king's welcome by the league and reciprocated with the best offensive performance in the entire XFL.

The King Slayer threw for 291 yards and two touchdowns and received a showering of "MVP" chants on his first drive of the game (which, full disclosure, sounded suspicious for the relatively small crowd).

Things did not go so well for former Buckeye linebacker turned XFL defensive coordinator Pepper Johnson. After his defense gave up four passing touchdowns this weekend, he has been relieved of his duties after just one game.

They play no games, and I respect that.

 BOW DOWN. I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't point out Buckeye royalty to you when it strikes me, and I think I may have found the rightful queen of Columbus.

Bow down to Mary Ann Trapp.

Assuming about four hours a game, this legend has spent about 90 collective days in the concrete cathedral. And she has seen some history.

She preferred the student section, which offered a better vantage point. She recalls one of the more exciting games — the famous 1950 Snow Bowl against Michigan.

“That game was so cold,” Trapp says, shivering at the memory. “There was snow everywhere. They had to sweep the goal line before the start of the game.

“When we got to our seats, all of the boys around us were throwing snowballs at each other. It was really quite a scene — women in fur coats and boys throwing snowballs. I’ll never forget it.”

The outcome of that game made it even colder.

“Michigan never made a first down. [They] blocked a kick and beat us. Can you imagine that? No first downs and they beat us!”

The Wolverine’s 9-3 victory sent them to the Rose Bowl, a win that lives on in college football lore and Trapp’s mental scrapbook of Buckeye football.

Trapp has seen all six of Ohio State’s Heisman winners in action, all eight national championship teams the program has fielded and all but one of Ohio State’s victories against Michigan inside Ohio Stadium (1928).

The one game she missed was because she decided to take her deceased friend's place on a trip to Australia, accompanying her other friend, which is a more valid reason than I've ever even had for missing class.

 COME HOME, BERT. We narrowly avoided an annual date with Luke Fickell, and there's a solid chance we get the most hilarious result possibly instead.

Folks, it's time to bring Bert back to the Big Ten.

I never knew I needed something so badly. Speak it into existence.

 NOT STICKING TO SPORTS. Arizona "KryptoKing" and his accomplice swindle former MLB players out of millions with a cryptocurrency Ponzi scheme... The shelter giving wine to alcoholics... A vending machine in Canada is dispensing drugs twice as strong as heroin... A Missouri jail is accused of strapping people to a chair for days on end... A critic accidentally destroys a $20,000 artwork... How true are movies that are "based on a true story?"... Why a lack of sleep makes you anxious.

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