After an unofficial media poll picked Ohio State to win the Big Ten, I volunteered to be the troll the team needed. For a week, I predicted four losses in 2016. Some people understood. Others didn't.
It appears my campaign to discredit Ohio State worked. Coaches (and their SIDs) ranked Ohio State as the fifth best team entering this season. It's almost as if the 2016 Fiesta Bowl was an exhibition game with a trophy.
The fifth-best team in the country doesn't even make the playoffs, so I hope every player spends three hours looking in a mirror before heading to camp Saturday. Fifth-best!? I'd divorce my wife over a line like that if only she hadn't left me 10 years ago.
This week's NSFW ANTI-WORK #BANGERS:
- Annual repost: 100 greatest quotes from The Wire.
- Game of Thrones: Tyrion's trial.
- Game of Thrones: Jon Snow charges into battle.
Programming Note: Driving to Boone, North Carolina today for a wedding in Fayetteville tomorrow. There will be no Saturday Skull Session this week — bosses' orders. I know y'all will do fine without me.
VINDICATED. Nobody really knows how the College Football Playoff Committee works. There's a fancy room, some TVs, and a group of Baby Boomers arguing about #sports.
But four members retired this year, and they spoke to the Worldwide Leader about the inner workings of the secret society.
The OSU-centric stuff, from espn.com:
Was the Baylor-TCU debate the most memorable part of your tenure?
Mike Tranghese: Without question, yes. That was the debate for the last five weeks of the year. We probably spent more time just discussing Baylor and TCU but then in the end, Ohio State just played very well at the end, and the way they dominated Wisconsin in the end, the championship game really took the pressure of making that decision out of our hands.
[...]
Do you feel like you got it right the past two years?
Tranghese: Yeah. I think so. Year 1 was very difficult. I think Ohio State took us off the hook. If Ohio State hadn't beaten Wisconsin, or let's say hadn't won convincingly, we would've had a very, very difficult decision to make. I don't know how other people would have voted, but my sense was we were really split on it. That's OK. We would've had to eventually reach a decision, because there was a great different of opinion just about Baylor and TCU. Some people felt strongly that Baylor had beaten TCU, but others felt that TCU was better. And then you had Ohio State in the mix at the end. It would have been very interesting, but we never got to that point. Ohio State made it clear who the fourth team is. We take them and they end up playing magnificently and running the table. And I didn't think there was much mystery in last year. When Ohio State lost to Michigan State, that probably cleared it up a little bit.
He's damn right Ohio State took them off the hook. Even if it hadn't pushed Wisconsin into Lake Michigan, it still would've won a Big Ten championship with a third-string QB.
Still, it's good to see the Buckeyes squashed all the Baylor–TCU talk. Thank Warren G. Harding for the playoffs, too. Otherwise, Alabama would've dumped Oregon for the title and Nick Saban might be the despot of the Confederate States of Alabama.
BUCKEYE ROOKS GET THEIR RATINGS. EA Sports, a bloodthirsty video game cartel you and your loved ones should avoid at all costs, will release Madden 17 on August 23rd.
But I know some readers won't heed my warnings, so here are the ratings of the Buckeye rookie class, via collegespun.com:
| PLAYER | OVERALL RATING | HIGHEST RATING |
|---|---|---|
| EZEKIEL ELLIOTT | 80 | SPEED (92) |
| JOEY BOSA | 79 | ACCELERATION (86) |
| ELI APPLE | 76 | SPEED (92) |
| TAYLOR DECKER | 76 | STRENGTH (90) |
| DARRON LEE | 73 | AGILITY (89) |
| VONN BELL | 71 | ACCELERATION (89) |
| BRAXTON MILLER | 71 | AGILITY (94) |
| MICHAEL THOMAS | 70 | AGILITY (91) |
| ADOLPHUS WASHINGTON | 70 | ACCELERATION (83) |
| NICK VANNETT | 70 | ACCELERATION (83) |
| JOSHUA PERRY | 66 | ACCELERATION (86) |
| CARDALE JONES | 66 | ACCELERATION (85) |
Apparently, Cardale Jones' acceleration(!?) is higher than his throwing power, which will prove an errant judgment when Jones kills a slot receiver running a crossing pattern during the third quarter of Week 14.
As for who will make the biggest jump, I'm wagering on Mike Thomas.
PICKING SLOB PONIES. Ohio State is an offensive line–driven program, which means it will be the most intriguing battle in camp. Right tackle and left guard are up for grabs, and new Slob commander Greg Studrawa won't lack for options.
I'll be surprised if former five-star OT Isaiah Prince doesn't start at right tackle, which means there will be a logjam for the final spot.
From cleveland.com:
Players in the mix [at left guard]: Michael Jordan, freshman; Malcolm Pridgeon, junior; Demetrius Knox, redshirt sophomore; Evan Lisle, redshirt junior; Matthew Burrell, redshirt freshman.
[...]
What could happen: Jordan impressed in spring ball, beating out Knox, Lisle and Burrell for the open guard spot. Because of his junior college experience, holding off Pridgeon could prove more difficult. Here's the advantage for Jordan: He only needs to show that the gap between him and Pridgeon is smaller than the gap between Prince and Pridgeon. That scenario could end with both Pridgeon and Jones earning starting spots, and Prince as the odd man out.
The Choice: Ohio State has to figure out the best two out of a true freshman, a sophomore with limited experience and a junior college transfer. The pumping up of a freshman and the addition of a JUCO guy could also be a motivational tool for guys who have been on the roster for a year or two. In the end the Buckeyes could decide to make starters out of two players who have never played a snap of Division I football.
Meyer said true freshman Michael Jordan might become the second 19-year-old to start along the offensive line for him (the first being Florida's Maurkice Pouncey). Jordan, by all accounts, is as dominant as a freshman can be, but this could also be a classic motivational tactic for the other guys.
I think it's a three-man battle for LG between Burrell, Jordan, and Pridgeon. If Burrell or Jordan win, Pridgeon could be used as a backup capable of spelling any position on the line outside of center. Not a bad Pokéball to have in the chest.
If Jordan wins, let's hope it's because he's the truth. If not, things could get dicey for the offensive line — especially if the receivers fail to develop.
RAVENEL TO ISRAEL. After conquering Japan's best professional basketball league, former Ohio State big man Evan Ravenel is on to other challenges.
From sportando.com:
The Maccabi Hunter Haifa professional basketball team of the Israeli Basketball Super League announced today they have signed center/power forward Evan Ravenel through the 2017-18 season. Per club policy, terms of the deal were not disclosed.
This is good news for Shoeless LaQuinton Ross, who could use some backup for the next knuckleduster with racist thugs.
A LESSON IN RUSSIAN DIPLOMACY. Besides being morally wrong, you shouldn't rob people because you never know who is trained to whoop that ass:
Criminals tried to rob a Russian diplomat near athletes village at gun point. He knew jujitsu & fought back, stole gun and shot robber dead
— Tom Steinfort (@tomsteinfort) August 4, 2016
Life comes at you fast, folks.
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