So let me preface this by saying I am a Cancer survivor. I was diagnosed with a pretty rare lymphoma during my time at Ohio State. Luckily it had not metastasized when I was diagnosed. I had a swollen lymph node in my neck that pretty rapidly grew to about the size of a small walnut. I went to my doctor 3 times before a recommendation for a biopsy. The next week I received a phone call from my parents that they were coming to pick me up and take me to the ER, I knew why immediately. I began treatment a little less than a week after my diagnosis. The chemo protocol was a number of chemo drugs and I would be inpatient for 1 week before being released for 2 weeks while my blood counts would recover. It was going to be 5 rounds of chemo.. if everything went perfectly it would be about a little over 3 months. However they told me that it never goes perfectly, blood counts take longer to get back up etcc... turns out my treatment had gone very well through the first 4 rounds of chemo, I only had to have one blood transfusion which is a very low number. I was scheduled to have a PET scan to determine how the treatment had worked. The PET showed there was still a higher sugar uptake and they thought that I might have to do a second Chemo protocol, however they said it could be due to the formation of scar tissue at the biopsy site and not tumor sugar uptake. They decided to do a biopsy. About a week later I was home at my parents when my home phone rang and my mom said that my Oncologist wanted to speak with me. I answered the phone and headed back down to the basement couch where I had spent time being a recluse due to some depression; it turns out I was receiving some of the best news of my life, my oncologist told me my biopsy was clean and I was in remission, however I would have to finish my last round of chemo to ensure there weren't any rogue cancer cells missed in the biopsy. Cincinnati Children's and Ohio State were even able to help me finish two of my courses from fall quarter. I decided I would enroll for the following fall quarter and get on with my life. I struggled with health anxiety, general anxiety, and depression upon returning to school but still managed to raise a GPA that was low due to a very immature freshman year. Eventually I would come out of my anxiety and depression and make it into, and graduate from the Fisher School of Business. I moved back home and in a few months had landed my first real job. Since then I never had experienced any significant battles with hypochondria, but I did have anxiety and occasional depression about figuring out my career path and growing into an adult in general.
Fast forward to last month.. 8 years and 1 month after being in remission; I am at my parents one Sunday and I get into an argument with my Dad and he ask me to leave. The argument was intense and felt very bad after. That Wednesday I call my mom during my lunch break and she tells me she's taking him to the ER and they think he has a blood clot in his leg. Turns out he does, so I go and visit him in the hospital where he is in the ICU with a tube in his arteries to his lower leg to pump medication to reduce and thin the clots. He had an aneurysm in his artery which allowed the clots to form. He would need a bypass surgery to remove the artery with the aneurysm. It actually took awhile for him to get the pulse back in his foot and amputation became a concern. Thankfully he did get a pulse back and was cleared for the bypass surgery. Eventually he came home and has been recovering since.
This really stressed me out, and during this time I felt some minor numbness/tingling in my right foot and tightness in my calf.. So I worried I had a blood clot too. But then I had the same thing in my right hand and began having muscle twitches in my legs and eyelid that were actually visible. So I did what I know I shouldn't and googled.. one of the first things that comes up for twitching muscles is ALS.. which to me, I would rather have cancer again than have ALS. So I have been pretty worried ever since even though I had my annual cancer check up and my oncologist did some physical strength test and told me to stop worrying. However that's a lot easier said than done. I do not have any other ALS symptoms such as muscular atrophy or muscle weakness, which is relieving but the twitches are still concerning. Muscle twitches can also be from benign fasciculation syndrome, electrolyte imbalances, and stress. Which if the muscle twitches cause stress and anxiety, and are caused by stress anxiety.. it's a bad loop to be in.
I know this is a weird place to post something like this but I think the 11 warriors community is overall awesome and a supportive forum.
Has anyone else out there struggled with health anxiety or hypochondria? If so how have you been able to overcome it?
