11W Weekend Update: Sponsored by Tamiflu

By Luke Zimmermann on September 10, 2009 at 7:00 am
The only cure is more cowbell.While CMU/MSU may be of fringe interest,
there is nothing fringe about LeFevour.

With Ohio State's de facto Bye Weekend looming ominously, I'm pulling out all the stops and showing you exactly just what you're going to be doing between the hours of noon Saturday and 1 am Sunday morning. The burden of creatively lying to your significant other/place of employment: that my friends, is on you.

Somewhere between the "THANK GOODNESS IT'S FINALLY HERE!!" proximity infatuation of Week 1 and the "my that Fresno State offense's surprisingly effective multiple tempo look sure is producing a higher efficiency outcome than the previous series" near problem-addiction-level-college-football-viewing nature of Week 2 is where the wheat is truly seperated from the chaffe; the casual fan from the aficionados. Abandon all hope 'ye who enter here, because much like you don't casually roll into the hardest neighborhood in LA at 3 am looking for some dice action, you go all in or you go home with your Week 2 college football viewing.

National Games

Clemson at #14 Georgia Tech, 7:30PM Thursday - ESPN
We're spotting Jonathan Dwyer the C & the A this Thursday evening and letting those frou-frou nancy pantsers enjoy the NCAA College Football Senior Tour. DABO! DABO! DABO! Sweeney and redshirt freshman quarterback Kyle Parker see if CJ Spiller can bounce back from an injury suffered last week against Middle Tennessee State and help lead the Tigers into Atlanta to squab with Paul Johnson's All-American flexbone attack. Given last Saturday's 4th quarter, if you're the least bit prone to post traumatic stress or are presently taking any kind of heart medication, you may strongly consider the Old Timers league during Wramblin' Wreck offensive possessions.

Houston at #5 Oklahoma State 3:30PM - Fox Sports Net
Coming off their impressive defensive showing against suddenly in crisis Georgia, can Oklahoma State's much improved defense under first year man Bill Young continue their stout ways against Case Keenem and Kevin Sumlin's offensive barrage? For anyone scratching their arms in sore need of their Arena Football fix (R.I.P. Destroyers), strongly consider this potential aerial dogfight.

UCLA at Tennessee, 4:00PM - ESPN
While you may be scratching your heads wondering what exactly two unranked non-bowl teams would have possibly appealing to you, consider that this is a rematch of the game in which Rick Neuheisel helped put his alma matter back on the map by upsetting the Vols in Westwood last Fall. Both Tennessee and UCLA look to be on the continued up and up, and c'mon, you can't pretend you're not morbidly curious how Lane Kiffin's bunch will look against legitimate flesh & blood opposition (all Bowling Green, KY inhabitans are now the living dead thanks to this gentleman).

South Carolina at #20 Georgia, 7:00PM - ESPN2
For purveyors of bad offenses tickle fighting underneath the moonlight, this game is all you. OBC, the likely still not ready for primetime Stephen Garcia (and friend!), and the Gamecocks take on the still shell shocked from their trip outside of the comfy confines of the southeast Georgia Bulldogs. We'll see if the Ginger Ninja can manage to get freak-of-nature wide receiver A.J. Green in the mix more this week or if UGA will look down towards the bench at a a number of promising youngsters should this one start to slip away from them.

Big Ten Games

Central Michigan at Michigan State, 12:00PM - ESPN or ESPN2
Coach D's Fightin' Sparty go toe-to-toe with the most infectious disease this side of Swine Flu. We'll get to see exactly how far along Michigan State quarterback Kirk Cousins is this weekend as it may take half a hundred to go score for score with the stocked offensive cubbard UC coach Brian Kelly left behind when he departed the Chippewahs for the Queen City.

Fresno State at Wisconsin, 12:00PM - ESPN2 or ESPN
Speaking of H1N1, with at least 10 Badgers showing flu like symptoms, it will be interesting to see how Bret Bielema's bunch responds. Coming off an underwhelming performance against Northern Illinois, can Bucky Badger and co. take down a Pat Hill coached team who at this point have to be desperate for a long overdue follow up to the David Carr era?

#18 Notre Dame at Michigan, 3:30PM - ABC
Despite my best efforts, I was unable to find a way that both of these teams can come away losers Saturday. An embarassing Notre Dame victory means potential MGoKitten status for our very favorite hippie up north. An TSUN wallop means a hotter seat for one of the least likable coaches in the business, and, as much as it pains us to admit, some minor brownie points for a conference who's been in need of some good, positive PR of late. In fact, one of the men responsible for the entire J LEMAN: FREEDOM FIGHTER meme even had to go all Peter Parker on us, strip down, and throw verbal 'bows under an unfamiliar name.

Purdue at Oregon 10:15 pm - Fox Sports Net
Every meal, no matter how satisfying or vomit enducing, deserves a dessert. In lieu of the Boilermakers' Ralph Bolden's insane 234 yards on 21 carries last week, and Chip Kelly and co.'s quest to rage on Fightin Round the World, I suggest you make this one yours.