You may find that work, school, or other obligations keep you from focusing on Twitter the way you should. Thankfully for you, I'm able to tune out those distractions and provide you with a weekly rundown of the best tweets from around campus.
The Buckeyes are off this week (and oddly enough, have very close to the same chance of losing as they did last week). So, the weekend will feel a little emptier than usual.
Lucky for you, we don't take weeks off here at Eleven Warriors. We have plenty of #content to help cure your bye-week blues, starting with your regularly scheduled review of the week's best tweets.
The freshman 15 has turned into the freshman 50 for some people— Brady Taylor (@beTaylor79) October 29, 2015
Still haven't updated my phone and got the new emojis. Been seeing question marks for a solid week now.— Stephen Collier (@S13Collier) October 29, 2015
I'm scared to death to update my phone. It's already on its last leg, I'm not sure it can handle the update. The camera no longer focuses, forcing me to use my front camera for almost everything, the home button no longer works, it won't hold a charge for longer than 4 hours, it sometimes refuses to play sound, and I have to hold my charger in the perfect position for it to charge. I complained to one of my friends for moral support and all I got was "your life is a disaster." Yes. It is.
30 minutes feel like 10 minutes in college.— Jerome Baker Jr. (@Lastname_Baker) October 26, 2015
R.I.P to those who just got splashed by the cabs bus— Jeff Greene (@JGreene_8) October 28, 2015
Twitter high key my sportscenter.. I don't even watch T.V— Browns going 11-5 (@RestUpBoog) October 28, 2015
Let's just take a moment to appreciate the glory of Erick Smith's Twitter Avi.
If i got my Beats on, chances are I'm not gonna be able to hear you. You'd be surprised of the # of ppl who don't understand that lol— Kam Williams (@kd__will) October 28, 2015
Changing my body a little, weight & muscle tone— Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) October 26, 2015
Question: Does this mean he's going to look more or less like a Tonka Truck?
Whoever this chick that just walked in the market cold lol— Johnnie L. Dixon III (@YoungKing_JD5) October 27, 2015
I have a new pickup line. You just walk up and say "Hello, I think you're pretty. Are you nice?" If she says "no," you avert disaster because she's either telling the truth or she's no fun. If she says "yes," she's either telling the truth or she's at least fun enough to take on a date. There is no downside.
Happy Birthday Meech... pic.twitter.com/sTkJna00UP— Brady Taylor (@beTaylor79) October 23, 2015
Happy Birthday Meech Pt. 2... pic.twitter.com/iePOwJfxPX— Brady Taylor (@beTaylor79) October 23, 2015
Steve jobs or the Martian?? #solomovienight— Sean Nuernberger (@Sean4Heisman1) October 23, 2015
Steve jobs it is #solomovienight— Sean Nuernberger (@Sean4Heisman1) October 28, 2015
It took this man almost a week to decide on a movie...
Don't know why I agreed to come to a haunted house and I can't even watch scary movies— Jamarco Jones (@jjones_74) October 26, 2015
Wait. Wasn't it just last week you were throwing shade to Stephen Collier for not wanting to go to a haunted house? Flip-flopping, I see.
I'm making an early prediction. Next Thursday I'm willing to put my career on the line that the @browns beat the Bengals. I can feel it!!— Tyvis Powell (@1Tyvis) October 30, 2015
Y'all laughing at me now, but when it happens y'all gone say "That darn Tyvis called it." U heard it here first!!!— Tyvis Powell (@1Tyvis) October 30, 2015
I want cereal but we have no milk.— Jerome Baker Jr. (@Lastname_Baker) October 25, 2015
You got Gatorade? Try it the Harbaugh way.
I really think some professors give a couple of random people 100% on tests just so the class average looks great...— Sean Nuernberger (@Sean4Heisman1) October 30, 2015
I'd be willing to bet he did not receive the arbitrary 100%
This man Michael Myers could catch anyone while walking. Like you have zero chance. Imagine a defense of all him, you're not gaining a yard.— Taylor Decker (@TDeck68) October 28, 2015
It's been a while, but it looks like #cornerbackscoachkerrycoombshashtags are back. I think I speak for everybody when I say we missed them dearly.
Jacoby Boren Finds A Hater
After Ohio State's 49-7
I took a stroll through this guy's timeline to see what I would find.
Jacoby Boren off to his usual start... face first on the turf while his man makes the tackle.— Nicholas A. Kovach (@TheKovach) October 25, 2015
That one was Boren's fault.— Nicholas A. Kovach (@TheKovach) October 25, 2015
Apparently, this has been going on for weeks.
Jalin Marshall went to the Jacoby Boren school of blocking.— Nicholas A. Kovach (@TheKovach) October 18, 2015
Ohio State Lineman Billy Price Hurt & Leaves Game. Ohio State Lineman Jacoby Boren Hurts Team by Staying in Game.— Nicholas A. Kovach (@TheKovach) October 10, 2015
Perhaps the best part is this guy has 1,200 followers, but the only person favoriting these tweets is Brady Taylor – sarcastically.
Anyway, Jacoby Boren responded to his biggest fan.
why do you have to be so mean... Football players have feelings too lol https://t.co/zrdTtdsea9— Jacoby Boren (@Jboren50) October 25, 2015
@TheKovach don't go soft on me now Nicholas. Come to the woody Tuesday and get my center reps this bye week. Heard the position is wide open— Jacoby Boren (@Jboren50) October 25, 2015
I know the perfect way to settle this – jousting. Give them each a lance and a horse and we'll see who emerges victorious. It's the only way.
Kato Killed a Man
Ohio State walk on receiver had perhaps the most memorable play of the game last week, and it came without the ball in his hands.
Kato Mitchell doing his best Evan Spencer impersonation. https://t.co/OFTFMzmhq6— Christopher Jason (@cjason112) October 25, 2015
Naturally, this got some people talking.
My boy getting a hit city https://t.co/dR8DosiFJc— Taylor Decker (@TDeck68) October 25, 2015
shoutout to my lightskin brother @worktoon putting in some light work throwing boys out the club lol— Dontre Wilson (@treydayy_) October 25, 2015
I was just doing what @Jamesclark_94 told me.....make every play count— Prince Charming (@worktoon) October 25, 2015
Kato was quick to point out that he wasn't the only one who deserved praise.
Yall talking about my block but did yall see my brother @JGreene_8 catch.... nothing was gonna stop him from getting that ball— Prince Charming (@worktoon) October 25, 2015
S/o to my lil bro @Nb_Eight0 for blessing me with the hands before the game— Jeff Greene (@JGreene_8) October 25, 2015
Cause I had to go change my gloves after warm ups lol https://t.co/OkUmQ5vqYh— Jeff Greene (@JGreene_8) October 25, 2015
I just want to thank god 4real tho for giving me that opportunity and giving me my gifts and talents #Blessed— Prince Charming (@worktoon) October 25, 2015
Looks like Ohio State may have found their new center, amirite Nicholas A. Kovach?
This Week's Winner Of Twitter
Maybe two pillows. I'm a good size and cardales like 280/290, somewhere in that range.— Stephen Collier (@S13Collier) October 29, 2015