Last October, my Grandpa, who was like a father to me, passed away. Ironically, it was a half hour before kickoff of the Oregon regular season game. He was on hospice, so we knew it was coming, but now we often joke that he gave in to rid himself of the disastrous ending we would endure 4 hours later. Now that the grief is mostly passed, I often find myself finding happiness and joy in the day to day "things" that remind me of him. Over the weekend, I had a huge moment of reflection.
As a kid, my Grandpa would tell me time and time again that the fast paced life in this current generation is the one thing he would change if he had the power to do so. I always thought he was just being a "get off my lawn" old man. But this weekend, while changing out the exterior doors on my house, a sudden wave of realization came over me.
The younger generation of adults (20s to early 30s) are often poked fun at for not knowing how to do several hands-on tasks that the older generations could. And instead relying on contractors and general handymen to do tasks, resulting in more expenditure. My Grandpa never blamed the youth though. He blamed it on the "fast paced life" that I mentioned above. When my dad was growing up, my grandma, like many other mothers in that generation stayed home. She worked a handful of part-time gigs here and there, but mostly was available at home. When Dad got home from school, the "inside chores" were complete. Dinner was being prepared, house was clean. This gave my grandpa "time" and allowed all his focus to be on the outside and handyman type chores. With more "time", it meant he could take the extra hour to show my dad how to do these tasks. It was OK that a 1 hour chore turned into a 2 hour chore. As a result, my dad knows how to do everything. I've actually never once seen the man open the instruction book on anything in my life.
Getting back to my moment of realization. My task was simple. Change out the 4 exterior screen doors on my house. Not a major ask, but simply doing it myself and not relying on a contractor or Lowe's professional cut the cost in half. Between my wife and I both working, we are equally responsible for the inside chores. So we had to make a plan in order to get these doors changed out.
I'll get home from work a half hour early and start dinner. Our laundry is backed up from the 5 straight nights of 2 hour long 10U summer league baseball practice, so I'll start and fold a load of that. Once she gets home, she can finish up dinner while I start on the doors. I'll get as much done as I can, run it and grab a quick bite, before heading back out. The doors have to be done by today because the next 2 weeks evenings are booked with 10 baseball practices/games, 2 private dance practices because apparently 8 year old girls can't be on the competitive cheer squad unless they have a private instructor year round, and 2 nights of school orientation before the 1st day.
As I was sitting on the doorstep attaching the closer to the 1st new screen door, my son came out and asked if he could drill the holes for me. Instantly, I said "I'm sorry bud, but I gotta hurry and get this done". That is when my Grandpa's statement that the "fast paced lifestyle" is the one thing he would change, made complete and total sense to me. I literally sat on the door step in silence for 3-5 minutes as that wave crashed over me.
I came inside and asked me son "Hey man, you've had 18 baseball practices/games alone this month, you wanna skip tomorrow and help me with these doors", to which he happily obliged. I text his 10U coach and explained the situation to which I received a reply "well I can't guarantee he will start this weekend then". Guess my 10 year old won't be impressing the countless MLB scouts at the local 10U fields this weekend. Damn. It doesn't phase me though. I probably played in over 500 youth sports games as a kid, and can hardly remember the details of more than a couple. But you know what I do remember? Every single project that my dad or grandpa let me "help" on, getting it done, and relaxing by throwing the pigskin in the backyard and cracking up a cold one (coke for me) with my dad/grandpa.
