I was reminded today of an encounter with one of the many oddballs patients I cared for during my thousands of ambulance runs in years past. Floyd was an elderly man, but one of those that seemed to always have been the same age. I had seen him around for over 20 years and he never looked any older or younger at any point during that time. Old, hunched, a bit disheveled, and ALWAYS wearing black rubber snow boots. Year round. The kind you pull over your shoes with all the metal buckles.
One particularly warm August day about 15 years ago, we were called to transfer this nut gentleman to a larger facility for advanced cardiac care. He tottered out of the restroom upon our arrival tethered to IV tubing, oxygen and heart monitors, his unbuckled boots sitting about mid-calf below the bare legs and ass hanging out of his hospital gown. As we connected our necessary monitors and equipment to him for his journey, he began to make small talk.
"Sure is a warm one out there today," he said. I agreed as it was uncomfortably hot outside. Then he said, "That's why I need you help."
I had no idea where this conversation was heading.
He asked, "Does the YMCA have a pool?" I told him that it did indeed have a pool. He then said, "Would they let me swim in it?" I told him that with a membership, I'm sure they would. "You're sure?" I assured him it was included with the membership.
"Well, the Racquet Club said it was included too, but they won't let me swim there," he said. I should never have asked why.
"They used to let me, but then they started getting upset about it. You see, I have a little trouble with my bowels and they are not very understanding. I messed myself in the pool and they got mad about it. My membership was all paid up and everything. It only happened just the three times. They'd probably be more understanding at the Y. Can you put a good word in for me?"
How do you respond to that? Thankfully I have a great ability to keep a straight face.
"So you're saying it was just the three times? And they stopped letting you swim altogether? That's bullshit, Floyd! I'll have David here make some calls and see what he can do. Don't forget to have Dave give you his number when we drop you off."
Ever have one of those WTF moments at work that make you question the sanity of your fellow man? Health care is a magnet for such encounters. Floyd never lived to see the pool at the local YMCA, but I have never regretted offering my pen to him so he could take down Dave's number. It could have been a wonderful relationship.
