The Top 10 Reasons to Respect the Basement

By Jason Priestas on February 19, 2012 at 5:10p
Ted Williams wants you to Respect the Basement

Good afternoon, fine sir/madam. As you may already know, we are holding a fundraiser to hire 11W's first full-time beat writer.

Many of you have already given generously and we are beyond appreciative. Thank you, it means a lot to us. For those that may be on the fence, allow me to give you an example of how a beat writer will make Eleven Warriors better.

Last week, Ohio State made S&C director Mickey Marotti available to the press in the middle of the week. Marotti met with reporters to discuss the state of the program and answer questions. When he finished, John Simon and Etienne Sabino took turns at the podium. As this occurred during the middle of the work day, we were unable to attend the event. With a beat writer, we're tweeting the event live and following up with a story and video.

Events like this happen all of the time and with the staff of this site working full time jobs, many of them are impossible for us to attend. The beat writer solves this.

Now, we could probably raise the money for a beat writer if we NASCAR'd the site out with ads, went to a subscription model or implemented sketchy revenue streams like popup ads, in-content text ads (the annoying double-linked words you find on certain sites), auto-playing video ads or any of a number of solutions that will cheapen the 11W experience. 

We don't plan on doing any of that, so we're asking for a little bit of help. It's an important step in the evolution of 11W and if things go well, we will only have to ask for your help just this once.

Still not convinced? Here are the top 10 reasons to Respect the Basement:

10. We still owe punitive damages to Bar Louie and the City of Columbus for Drink Too, Brutus 2011. 

09. Consider donating what you would have spent on doughnuts in one month to 11W. NOW WE'RE ALSO YOUR WEIGHT LOSS PLAN!

08. It will be nice to have an organ bank on staff.

07. We lost a lot of money to Art Schlichter. Don't ask.

06. We can at long last afford the cover to Ray Small's REALER THAN REAL CLUB ICESTRAVAGANZA.

05. Consider it hush money. Who is to stop us from telling your manager how much time you spend on 11W while on the clock?

04. Donating allows you to truthfully add "Twelfth Warrior" to your resume and include 11W as a reference for future employers.

03. Congress will gift Michigan to Canada, but they want to see action on our end first.

02. Your contribution, regardless of size, categorically makes you a Job Creator.

01. If we hit our fundraiser goal, we can hire someone other than Bruce Hooley.


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Denny's picture

Feel like you're calling me out for dropping that glass at 2:15 AM at D2B. I was just following the example set by so many others.


Alex's picture

I think Jason was talking about himself for...well...everything that happened that night

Ramzy Nasrallah's picture

More like "Top nine reasons to respect the basement" and then one totally unrelated comment about something called Drink Too, Brutus which never happened.

CanadianBuckeye's picture

Canada does not want Michigan.  That is not a gift, it is a burden.  Either way... I will donate what I can soon.

Jason Priestas's picture

Thank you, Bubbles.

Buckeyeholicwompa's picture

I just saw golden voice at the airport last week. I don't think I would have recognized him had it not been for his voice.

KE's picture

I got a T-shirt from a Notre Dame website a few years ago with an outline of the state of Michigan and the caption "Canada's Alabama". Very funny, true, and opaque to a surprisingly large number of people.

It was the comment about "cheapening the 11W experience" that got me to kick in a few bucks.

Maestro's picture

Can always use a resume booster.

vacuuming sucks

Ethos's picture

Any time I can put Warrior in my resume, its worth every penny.

"I spent 90 percent of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted." - George Best

NC_Buckeye's picture

There should be a "Twelfth Warrior" tshirt on the Eleven Warriors Dry Goods page at Skreened.

Also not to complain... is there any chance of Skreened adding some additional tshirt colors instead of just gray and blue? Like maybe black and red would be nice? Sweatshirts might be a nice option as well. 

Jason Priestas's picture

You are just seeing the colors related to that shirt style (American Apparel Unisex Athletic Tee). Change the shirt style by clicking on the "More styles..." link and you'll have plenty of additional color options.

Good call on the 12th Warrior shirt. Definitely something we'll look into.

BoFuquel's picture

Get in early, it's like SEC-UFM's recruiting class.You wait too long there may not be room for YA.GO BUCKS!

I wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then.