Friday Skull Session

By D.J. Byrnes on July 3, 2015 at 4:59 am
Justin Hilliard, 2015 Ohio State freshman
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Somehow this became a thing, but the big news yesterday is Braxton Miller plans to reaffirm his commitment to Ohio State and his rehab next week. So yeah, #QBgeddon is about to get real real.

This week's NSFW ANTI-WORK #BANGERS:

By the way: If you don't laugh at Eric's 8:35 a.m. story, you may be dead:

Set your clocks.

URBAN'S ALMA MATER ON THE RISE. The way everything Urban Meyer touches turns gold made me just assume his high school alma mater was a historic powerhouse. Not so for Ashtabula St. John.

From Jeff Svoboda of Scout.com:

“The city was booming,” Meyer told BSB. “We were in the playoffs a lot. It was Friday night football in Ashtabula. It was awesome. I wish everybody was able to have the same experience that I was able to have.”

It wouldn’t last, though. Northeast Ohio is filled with industry cities and towns where the jobs simply faded away. Slowly but surely, Ashtabula was no different as the plants closed and the port slowed.

Population bled, falling below 20,000 in the 2010 census. The median annual income and housing prices dropped well below the state average. The unemployment rate has taken up residence among the highest in the state. Tourism – wineries and covered bridges – makes the town go now.

Seems like a story to which a lot of Ohio cities can relate.

The St. John School is back on the rise after a hiatus, though. Given Urban Meyer's 2015, I fully expect them to win a state title this year just because a #teen Urban Meyer used to swagger through those halls. That's how osmosis works, right? (I failed biology twice in high school.) The full piece is worth it.

 BUY STOCK IN MEWHORT. Jack Mewhort's stock is about to be on the rise... literally.

From Dana Hunsinger of IndyStar.com:

Mewhort is at the front end of a somewhat quirky sports-meets-financial trend — linking stock to the underlying cash flows of an athlete's brand. He is the sixth IPO for Fantex, joining the San Francisco 49ers' Vernon Davis (VNDSL); Buffalo Bills' EJ Manuel (EJMLL); Cincinnati Bengals' Mohamed Sanu (SANUL); Chicago Bears' Alshon Jeffery (JEFFL); and St. Louis Rams' Michael Brockers (BRKSL) — all trading now atFantex.com

The stock pricing was determined by Fantex' projection that Mewhort will earn $58.8 million in gross lifetime brand income, most of which it predicts will come from an estimated nine years of future NFL salaries and bonuses.

The investment for those wanting to buy is a risky one, though, based solely on the performance of one man — Mewhort's brand income — his current and future playing contracts, as well as certain endorsements and appearance fees and potential post-career income from activities such as broadcasting.

After doing some research into these things, and as man with hundreds of dollars in his bank account, I can't recommend this investment to my good readers.

I wouldn't call Mewhort's offering a scam, but I will use it to springboard to the point that it's hilarious/sad how fast people can be duped by the use of the word "investment." 

Mewhort is in line to make $2.5 million if this deal goes through, so I can't hate on that. 

BIG TEN WIN TOTALS. Eventually you would think the Big Ten would get tired of getting its nose shoved in piles of its own shit like a delinquent dog. 

Via Bovada:

2015 B1G WIN TOTAL O/U
SCHOOL OVER/UNDER
ILLINOIS 3.5
INDIANA 6
IOWA 7.5
MARYLAND 4.5
MICHIGAN 7.5
MICHIGAN STATE 9.5
MINNESOTA 5.5
NEBRASKA 8
NORTHWESTERN 6.5
OHIO STATE 11
PENN STATE 7.5
PURDUE 4
RUTGERS 5
WISCONSIN 10

I was about to type, "How do people even find it in themselves to cheer for no-tries like Illinois?" but then I remembered I watched every second of the Cleveland Browns' 7-9 2014 campaign. I hate Illinois, but not as much as I hate myself.

I've seen some books list Ohio State's over/under at 11.5. To me, 11 is the sweet-spot. The payout might not be as regal, but it's either a win or money back. I'd take that bet every day (if I bet).

HUNTER STIEBER JUST WON A TITLE. Logan Stieber may have four national titles, but he never made a tweet as good as this one:

What a beautiful creature. I want to party with Fred; she looks like she know where to find opium.

 11W GOLF OUTING DEADLINE COMETH. The 11W Grassroots Golf Outing to benefit the Central Ohio chapter of the Alzheimer's Association is Sunday, July 19 at 2:00 at The Links of Echo Springs Golf Course.

The price is $60 and the deadline is tomorrow. You can Paypal Remy at RemyBuckeye@gmail.com. The price includes a cart, a round of golf, and a meal. It's going to be a certified banger. (The full details are here.)

You can bring yourself and be assigned to a team, otherwise it's teams of four. Unfortunately, there's a team of Marionaires playing that includes the elder Don Byrnes so your best chance at this point is second place.

Fair warning: I'm not playing. I'm wearing an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt, driving around a golf cart, and heckling the enemies of my team:

THOSE WMDs. I thought I couldn't like Boogie Cousins anymore than I did... Just more reasons to stay out of Texas and Australia... I can never look at Inception the same... Model my obituary after Douglas Legler's... Creating the Fairy Tales of the Brothers Grimm... Cyclists beware

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