Friday Skull Session

By D.J. Byrnes on March 7, 2014 at 6:00 am
119 Comments

Today's anti-work banger is Bill Burr's bit on the most difficult job on the world.

Now, here's some quick hits to get you up to speed on the happenings of Ohio State football:

  • Today is Ohio State's pro day. Seventeen former Buckeyes (including Etienne Sabino!) will be working out for at least 69 NFL representatives. The NFL Network will also be covering the event with Mike Mayock on the scene. It pops off at 9:30 a.m.
  • Former five-star recruit Vonn Bell has suffered an MCL injury. He needs surgery and will need miss the rest of spring practice. Cam Burrows is the next man up.
  • Luke Fickell, when asked if he feared for his job last year, responded with a meandering 351 words
  • Kyle's full report on the second practice is over here.
  • Jim Tressel is up for enshrinement in the Hall of Fame. He'd be a surefire candidate if only his Youngstown State days were considered. Tatgate means it's only a question of when he'll be enshrined. Man, I still love James Patrick Tressel.
  • Sammy Silverman is still a graphics/recruiting guru.

COLLEGE LIFE: STILL GRIMEY. If you were/are a true college student, you have lived in a house that couldn't/wouldn't pass a building inspection and was/is close to condemnation.

Some OSU students didn't even need to leave the dorms to get a firsthand lesson on this: 

After cockroaches were found in an Ohio State residence hall, a Student Life spokesman said the university is working — and spending — to keep bugs under control.

Residents of a room in Taylor Tower found cockroaches in the room Feb. 8, said Student Life spokesman Dave Isaacs.

The three students who were living in the room were then moved to another residence hall, though Isaacs did not know which one.

Pshhhh, how are you going to let some cockroaches punk you for your residency? Those little critters are full of protein. You know what we used to call a cockroach infestation in my day? A BLESSING. Just more proof kids these days are softer than a a bowl full of pudding.

Roaches, however, aren't the only thing invading OSU's campus. In something out of the Oregon Trail, there's been a mumps outbreak on campus as well:

The Ohio State University said Thursday night nine students on campus have mumps and they suspect two more cases.

The Columbus health department will investigate the suspected cases on Friday.

Officials are investigating to determine how the disease has been spread at the school. 

Hmmm. If only there was a way to prevent the mumps... you would really thinks scientists would have cooked something up by now in the name of public health, huh? *throws hands up* Sounds like a million dollar idea to me.

FRANK MARTIN, SUSPENDED. Here's South Carolina coach Frank Martin in 2012: 

Here's Frank Martin in 2014, when his players didn't play with the same passion in which Pitbull performs:

Frank Martin

Frank Martin, easily the most terrifying coach in the NCAA today, has been suspended for one game for this. What would Pitbull think about this language, Frank!?!?

SAMMY WATKINS DEMOLISHES HIS PRO DAY. This won't surprise anybody who watched the 2014 Orange Bowl:

Wide receiver Sammy Watkins wowed rows of scouts and left legions of fans looking in via mobile streaming on ESPN pining for the potential top five draft pick.

Watkins did not run the 40-yard dash, choosing to let his 4.43 at the NFL Scouting Combine last month stand, but he displayed big, soft and powerful hands, explosive speed into and out of breaks and the ability to go get the ball at its highest point as a receiver for quarterback Tajh Boyd.

[...]

Watkins is the No. 1 wide receiver in NFLDraftScout.com's rankings. The last wide receiver drafted first overall was Keyshawn Johnson (Jets), who was also at Clemson's workout Thursday.

I've been piloting the Manziel-to-the-Browns swagwagon since last summer, but if he's gone, I hope Sammy Watkins is the pick. Josh Gordon and Sammy (along with Jordan Cameron) could turn me into a Pro Bowl alternate. Given the Browns QB situation, my agent says I'm one injury away from getting a call.

OLE MISS HAS A HEFTY BURRITO AT QB. Jeremy Liggins was listed at 6'3" 270 lbs when he transferred into Ole Miss from junior college. Turns out, the kid came to spring camp "a little out of shape" and tipped the scales at 303 lbs. 

Hugh Freeze says they're working on slimming him down, but this guy apparently has a shot to be the next Ole Miss QB. If there is any sort of justice in this world... this will happen.



ANNOUNCING 11W'S OWN MARCH MADNESS. Folks, I'd like to announce the greatest idea I've had in the last decade: Eleven Warriors is going to be running our own form of March Madness. The goal is to crown THE GREATEST OHIOAN THAT EVER WAS OR IS.

We're going to hammer out some final details this weekend/next week, but (tentatively) it's going to be a 64 Ohioan tournament. The regions will (tentatively) be divided into Science, Celebrity, Sports and Military/Politics.

Obviously, I will be throwing all my weight behind the candidacy of the 29th President of the United States, Warren Gamaliel Harding.

We will come up with the field and the seeding and present each case equally. You, the people, will get to vote. In the end, we will all be winners, but one special Ohioan will take home glory that will echo through eternity.

We'll have more on this next week, but for now, we're fielding submissions; so feel free to drop your nominations in the comments section below. (OBVIOUSLY WE KNOW ABOUT THAT GUY NAMED WOODY HAYES.) Nominations can have been born in Ohio or just lived here for a substantial amount of time. 

THOSE WMDs. #Crew96 kicks-off on Saturday; here's an MLS season primer... The new Qatar Airways first-class seats look amazing... Sin City 2 trailer... 2013-14Lakers.JPEG... Chicago skyline reflected in Lake Michigan as seen from an airplane... Former WVU player suing NCAA, five power conferences... 35 million Getty images are now free to use... Second baby cured of HIV... Dean Smith's battle with dementia... How Bayern Munich decides who's taking a free kick...  How good is Browns C Alex Mack? Take a look... I think that's illegal, even in Oklahoma... 

119 Comments
View 119 Comments