Happy 4th of July! It's a great day to reflect on our freedom and the birth of our great nation.  However, we all know what everyone associates with this holiday these days ......fireworks.  They're cool (obviously).  So, before you get ready to go out and impress all your friends, let me remind you of what not to do:

I mean there's really no explanation needed for that.  If you see your buddy about to light gunpowder on fire near his genitals, just go ahead and start dialing 911.

This guy didn't get the memo either.  I mean what could go wrong?

Listen, it's also a bad idea to put a firework in reach of your dog....because he might just use it against you to punish you for all that bullshit Ol Roy you've been buying for the past 10 years.

And if you've drank enough that you believe you're really a superhero.....definitely don't let your buddies shoot fireworks at you.  I mean c'mon.

It's probably best to just leave the fireworks to the professionals .... or this guy ... who is either the coolest 4th of July guy ever or a professional...or maybe it's Oyster shooting at '92 ... in any case....

Because I go to bed early and have small children, I'll avoid the fireworks and stick to historical "did you knows" around the picnic table.  Here's one for the rest of you nerds to use on your families tomorrow:

Did you know ... (drum roll) ...

John Adams and Thomas Jefferson both died on July 4, 1826, which, if you're counting, was the 50th anniversary of the July 4th we're all celebrating. 

Ok I'm done now.

Have a good weekend folks.