The better question would be:
How many touchdowns would Ginn score if Cardale was quarterback? Answer: all of them.
Cardale in shotgun from our own 30. Ginn on the outside running a straight line. Cardale throws it as far as he can. Ginn outruns everyone and catches the ball. Defenders still can't believe the ball went that far. We quench our thirst with the tears of our opponents.
Is that a gay joke or a Canadian joke?
Baguettes are for Bitches
Best of luck to Epitropoulos, who I assume is a living trojan horse operating at the behest of Urban Meyer.
I'll summarize for those who couldn't hang with the entire piece:
We have one player who people know by name: Peppers. He saves the day and we win more games that we are supposed to win, including an upset of Ohio State - just like in 1969. TTUN football is back, baby.
I thought this was going to be a thread about gif restraint ...
I wonder what jifs from him would be like...
My best guess:
To a certain extent, but I think you can get plenty of helmet stickers with comments...
Just ask Oyster.
Nope. Just ax them.
Good point, BroJim. I was sort of wondering the same thing. However, I don't want to spend too much time there for 2 reasons:
1. Facts ruin good jokes every time; and
2. It saddens me to think that I missed my calling as a rich person crazy ass hat designer. It's like "Here madam duchess of wherever the hell you're from, it's
a pile of bullshit my drunk dog dragged in from the bean field my latest contemporary design - it highlights your importance in matters of state."
The MODS make take our (digital) lives...... but they'll NEVER take our GIIIIIFFFFFFSSSSSSS!!!!!!!
If I'm spending $350 I'm at least going to rock this:
Yea - what I mean what could go wrong after filming a woman having sex with you without her knowledge and leaving the video in your possession?
6. Do you consent to being filmed while engaged in sexual activity?
6.a. Do you agree to look into the camera and give verbal consent before each sexual activity of the evening?
6.b. Do you agree to bring along a friend to verify your level of intoxication and whether your behavior is within the range of normal? Does she agree to also give verbal indications of your level of consent to the camera?
In all seriousness, how do you evaluate whether the young lady you're with has more or less to lose than you do? Do you just take a form around with you when you speak with women? Hold on ma'am, I'm going to need you to fill out this form first?
1. Are you rich?
2. Are you likely to become a professional athlete?
3. Would your family/faith community disown you if you became pregnant?
4. Do you agree to use contraceptives at all times during our interactions?
5. Do you consent to any and all sexual activity for the remainder of the evening?
I feel like this is what it's like to lose some horrible contest. Imagine that you were a guy and you were drawing random women from a hat and that was the one woman you'd have permission to sleep with. Everyone ahead of you in line is drawing all of these beautiful young women and when you get there you draw .... Hillary Clinton. It's like winning the Showcase Showdown on the Price is Right except instead of a new car you get an all expense paid trip to your choice of South Sudan, Tehran, or Siberia. The inside of Saban's head must be a truly awful place.
While I have no empirical evidence, I'd bet that most recruits are not emotionally/mentally equipped at age 16-18 to handle the modern recruiting process in a healthy, positive way unless they are surrounded by really good adults who have the student's best interests at heart and not their own agenda. I also think that most (if not all) of those recruits come into school with a big ego. To me, selecting the right recruits based in part upon mental makeup and coach-ability is one of the many geniuses of Urban Meyer. I believe Urban tries to find the kids who are ultra competitive and who don't expect everything to be handed to them.
Well it's hard to have a rich, tradition filled history when it didn't start until the early 90's.