The Stumbler: Volume Seventeen – Beanie The Boss

By Jeff Beck on April 18, 2013 at 4:30p
Thanks for stumbling in

Hello, faithful Stumbler readers, and welcome to another edition. With the college football dead zone upon us (summer, you temptress) we need the Stumbler now more than ever.

It’s hard to say what fans of collegiate pigskinnin’ did before they could search for random Internet clips, photos, GIFs and collectibles of their favorite teams. I mean, there’s only so much kick the can you can play, amirite?

Anyhow, as I was Stumbling for this edition I found a number of things including this Horseshoe collectible football, a pretty solid “Buckeye Country” flag, and this tasteful OSU Mr. Potato Head

While all of those were intriguing potentials, ultimately I landed on this McFarlane Beanie Wells figurine.

The 6-inch statuette makes a strong to very strong first impression, and is guaranteed to impress the people who are as weird about OSU football as you are.

No chanceThanks for playing.

From the grass stains on the knee pads to the “ima truck you” body language, this is a thing of beauty.

No. 28 was truly a man among boys. To prove it, let’s take a closer look at what the phenom out of Akron was able to accomplish during his time as a member of the Scarlet and Gray.

Freshman Season

Coming out of H.S. Beanie was an incredibly heralded recruit. Rivals and Scout had him listed as a 5-star and each had him as the #1 RB in the country.

Needless to say, Wells was expected to deliver almost immediately. 

Luckily the load did not fall directly on his young shoulders as talented junior Antonio Pittman had solidified himself as the starter.

Pittman was assured his carries, but Beanie took advantage of the opportunities given to him to the tune of 104 carries for 576 yards and 7 TDs. Those numbers might have been even more impressive had Wells not come down with a terrible case of fumblitis during the season.

One great way to make Buckeye fans forget about past performance is to make plays in the Michigan game, and that's exactly what Wells did. Get loose, Beanie:

Sophomore Season

Beanie’s sophomore year was his coming-out party. With Pittman leaving early for the NFL Draft, the position was Wells’ alone to occupy. The bowling-ball back didn’t disappoint, carrying the ball 274 times for 1,609 yards and 15 TDs (that’s a 5.9 AYPC, folks.) 

During the season Wells rushed for 100+ yards nine times including a 221-yard, 1-TD game against Michigan State and a 222-yard, 2-TD outing against the Sun and Blue in Ann Arbor. The performance was one for the record books as no Ohio State player in the history of the rivalry has racked up more yardage on the ground than Wells did that day.

Here’s footage of Beanie and the rest of the Buckeyes doing work on that cloudy afternoon in 2007. I’m looking at you, Mike Hart:

Junior Season

Coming off a barnburner 2007 season, talk of Wells for Heisman was at an all-time high.

Things were set up perfectly for Beanie to make an impression, as the #2 ranked Buckeyes were set to take on the #1 ranked USC Trojans at the Coliseum in the third game on the slate.

To start the season, everything was going exactly as planned. In the home opener against Youngstown State, Wells had racked up 111 yards and 1 TD on just 13 carries. Then this happened…

Suddenly everything changed.

Reports came back that the injury was turf toe and Wells was ruled out of the next three games, including the showdown with the Fighting Carrolls.

Without their home-run hitter in the backfield, the Buckeyes were only able to muster a measly 3 points and were embarrassed in primetime. Still, the season was not over for Wells and the Buckeyes, who were able to bounce back and win eight of their remaining nine games. Despite the three-game void, Wells was able to eclipse the 1,000-yard mark for the second straight year, rushing for 1,197 yards and 8 TDs.

The strong season coupled with a workman-like outing in the Fiesta Bowl (16 carries for 106 yards) earned Wells a first-round draft selection and cemented him in the hearts of Buckeye fans across the country.

Beanie was a class act. When healthy, he was arguably one of the best backs in the country.

With that said, there was no argument when it came to best stiff-arm in the country. That of course belonged to No 28.

We appreciate the memories (and the knockouts), Beanie:

Thanks for stumbling in. Let’s do this again sometime.


Comments Show All Comments

BuckeyeEmpire's picture

The soundtrack on the final video is perfect

OSUAndy07's picture

Got that very action figure in my man cave. I'll have to upload some pics of it (the cave) sometime. 

"But I'm tryin' Ringo. I'm tryin', real hard, to be the shepherd"

Bucks43201's picture

LOLz @ the grass stains
LOLz @ you using the phrase "ima truck you"
Beanie --- my all-time fave OSU RB, which is saying a lot

"You win with people." - Woody Hayes

AJW_16's picture

Thank you so much for posting the video to the 2007 UM game. Two things: 1.) The Akron Anvil was an absolute beast that day. During his long TD run, I remember when he threw that first defender aside I knew it would be six. In my opinion he is the ultimate Wolverine Killer; 2.) Vernon Gholston gave Beanine a run for his money for being the biggest BAMF on the field that day. I like to think that Chad Henne sees Gholston charging at him right before he wakes up in a cold sweat and has an existential crisis. Damn, good memories.

"Sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes the bear eats you." 

cal3713's picture

Good timing, I was just talking about his stiff-arm with my father this afternoon.  Wish the figurine had his arm extended...

ohiowhitesnake's picture

The only thing that wasn't perfect in the first video was he didn't stiff arm anyone. Beanie was an absolute beast!

I finally got a set of Gold Pants!

Iron_Buckeye's picture

@ 0:58 of the Stiff Arm video is my all time favorite stiff arm!!!  

“The minute we stop expecting greatness from our football program, we become Wisconsin.” Craig Krenzel

BrewstersMillions's picture

It isn't often that I'm wrong.
Scratch that. It isn't often that I admit that I'm wrong but a while back I was here raving about Terrelle Pryor (I know, hard to believe) and dared to compare the javelin he used as a stiff arm to the jack hammer Beanie had...and I really fell short of the target. Pryor was good at keeping distance with his long limb but Beanie took years off of dude's lives with his.
I'm sorry 11W. I was horribly, horribly wrong.

Hovenaut's picture

I remember the 2006 U.S. Army H.S. All-American Bowl and seeing Beanie for the first time. Think he only had about 60 yards, but he scored three td's to lead Ted Ginn Sr's East squad over the West.

He won the MVP, and I could not wait to see him in Columbus.

AJW_16's picture

From the video it looks like Wisconsin received the brunt of Beanies stiffarm. I would go as far as to say that it has been outlawed in the state...

"Sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes the bear eats you." 

CentralFloridaBuckeye's picture

Beanie was a beast at OSU!  He ran with amazing speed with power.  Watching him destroy woudl be tacklers was awesome to watch.  Even better was when he leaped over people in route to the end zone!  Will go down as one of the best Buckeyes of all time!!
Go Bucks!

HighBallAce's picture

I never get tired of watching the Buckeyes beat the shit out of SCUM!

Boxley's picture

Damn, that was a well needed offseason shot in the arm. Thanks for putting that together, now I just need to play it all on a loop at work. 

"...the man who really counts in the world is the doer, not the mere critic-the man who actually does the work, even if roughly and imperfectly, not the man who only talks or writes about how it ought to be done." President T. Roosevelt

Dougger's picture

Played his best games against the best opponents... great stuff. 
Was at freshmen orientation with him and he wore a white cutoff t shirt... his arms, as an incoming freshman, were bigger than my head.

I like football