Thursday Skull Session

By Jeremy Birmingham on October 20, 2011 at 6:00a
129 Comments

Good Thursday morning Buckeye faithful. It is my sincere hope that you've all had a pleasant week up to this juncture, one full of the good tidings and cheer that usually follow a normal autumnal weekend. As Buckeye fans we have been pretty spoiled in the past twenty years or so, and perhaps we are not quite used to "living it up" following each and every Buckeye football win because they were so abundant.  We have learned, though, that things can change quickly. That being said, I hope that you, our readers are now perhaps seeing the small things in a little different light, at least temporarily.

The Buckeyes "shocked the world" this past weekend when they upset #16 Illinois, and they did so in a ground-control, three yards and a cloud of dust style that would have made Woody smile. Michigan showed that it still can't compete with a team that plays a physical Big Ten style of defense, and in some way, that probably was just as satisfying as the win over Illinois was for most Buckeye fans.

As we head into a bye-week, which I personally hate, it's a good time to sit back and reflect on this, the most tumultuous times faced by the men of scarlet and gray in decades; and to recognize the challenges that are still ahead. In our haste to move towards next year, and past a senior class that came in as acclaimed as any in Buckeye history, and will leave more disgraced than any in Buckeye history; let's not forget to enjoy the work and effort that Mike Brewster has put in. Let's not jump early and forget JB Shugarts (See what I did there?), or forget the perseverance of Andrew Sweat. Yes, it's impossible to not view the "Brew Crew" without some sadness about the transgressions some members have perpetrated, but each and every member of that class chose to be Buckeyes, and have given a lot of who they are to THE Ohio State University, and by proxy, millions of Buckeye fans all over the world.

Let's go to the goods...

 NCAA FUZZY MATH I know that much has been made of the discrepancies in the NCAA's levying of penalties as it concerns some members of the Ohio State football team. Ohio State had 6 football players suspended for five games for selling personal trinkets for discounts on tattoos. Ohio State had three players suspended two games for receiving less than $200 for an appearance at a fundraiser. Ohio State had a player suspended for five games for receiving money ($728, to be exact) for hours he didn't work at a job this summer. 

On Wednesday a few interesting things happened (interesting to me, anyway, jerks) as it pertains to their infractions committee, and it's hard to not notice how perfectly imbalanced their decision-making process truly is. One of the key players in the Boise State athletic department's "scandal" (you know, the one that was all over the news, all year long?), DT Ricky Tjong-A-Tjoe, was reinstated following his six-game suspension for receiving improper benefits worth roughly $13,600 prior to, and during, his time at the school. Tjoe received his benefits from a host family who happened to be Bronco boosters. 

Then on Wednesday, it was announced that three LSU players, including the ridiculously talented Tyrann Mathieu and starting tailback (and Ohioan) Spencer Ware, had violated their team's drug policy. It was then rumored that LSU would be suspending those players for this weekend's game against Auburn, a claim Les Miles later deflected. Of course, since the NCAA has no actual power other than what's been given to it by the schools that is comprised of, if that one game penalty was imposed by the school, that will be totality of the punishment, at least from an eligibility standpoint. The lesson? If you're going to cheat; cheat big. Also, drugs are ok, but don't you dare make a single dime off of you while the NCAA is still using your name, image and body to line their own pockets. 

 THE COACHING SITUATION Every week it seems like we see/read/hear more about who will take over the reins and reign supreme as head coach at Ohio State next year. This week, Jon Gruden signed a five-year extension with the evil empire that would seemingly preclude him from being a serious candidate if Ohio State approached him. I say "seemingly" because Gruden apparently has worked a few "out clauses" into his contract. The clause, a half-million dollar buy-out zeros in on four specific jobs, two in the NFL and two in the NCAA. Those jobs? The Ohio State Buckeyes, the Texas Longhorns, the Dallas Cowboys and the Miami Dolphins(?), are all jobs that could potentially be open this upcoming off-season, and it would be interesting to see if Gruden were to make good on his chances to bolt from bSPN.

Also this week, it was reported that barring any significant NCAA penalties, that it is almost certain that Urban Meyer will be taking the Ohio State job. While I can't speak to the validity of that report, I can certainly say without hesitation that the situation is not that cut-and-dried. Meyer is definitely interested, and the Buckeyes will definitely be willing to pay him whatever he asks for (rumor is somewhere around $6 million a year, fwiw), but the NCAA hold-up is not the only issue that is a concern for Meyer. The reasons he left Florida; his health, his desire to spend more time with family, the entitled athlete, etc - have not magically cleared up. Interesting sidenote: rumors that none other than Chris Spielman has been working Meyer's ear in the hopes that Urban would bring Spielman along as the Buckeyes next defensive coordinator.

Ok - We forgive you for those fumbles against Illinois in '92

EDDIE! EDDIE! At halftime of the Ohio State "scarlet out" against Wisconsin, the Buckeyes will honor Eddie George for his upcoming induction into the National Football Foundation & College Football Hall of Fame. George will be enshrined into the South Bend institution this December, and will become the 23rd Buckeye to enter the hallowed Hall. Eddie finished his Buckeye career with over 3700 rushing yards, including 1927 yards and 24 touchdowns on his way to winning the 1995 Heisman Trophy. Guess Rod Smith now has something else to accomplish on the quest to truly be the "next Eddie George".

TAKING A VERY IMPORTANT POLL. Many times growing up in northwest Ohio, I would spend my free time staring off into space and pondering some of the greatest questions that the universe has to offer. Why are we here? What is our purpose? How will I be remembered if I die? (I was a very deep, kid, you know)

However, no question has plagued me to this day as much as this one has: If you could have a super-power, what would it be? You only get one. No super-strength plus flying mumbo-jumbo. Give your answers, please.  Why did you choose the one you chose, what is the first thing you would do with that power, and would you make it widely known that you possessed this unique gift, or would you keep it under wraps in order to avoid all the troubles that come with being spectacular?

QUICK SLANTS. Everything is bigger in Texas...AWWWWWWWW...Man, I do NOT want to get old...Hue Jackson believes Raiders made "The Greatest Trade in Football"...Baseball says No-witzki, but it gets Dirk'd out.

 

129 Comments

Comments

Jeremy Birmingham's picture

If you follow me on Twitter, or would like to - please take note; I have finally decided to update my Twitter moniker to @BirmBuckeye11W

Abe Froman's picture

I think that this game was far more important than just beating the #16 team in the country as it should ensure eligibility for a bowl game with the um game being a maybe and the Wisc game most likely being a loss.  Nobody wants to go to a bowl with six wins, but seven definitely feels better and to allow this team to mature it is absolutely necessary to have them practice for the entire month of December.  The receiver corps and secondary, with all of its youth, will be immensely experienced (in comparison to the start of the year) by the bowl game.

 

Take bacon, roll it in flour and bake for 20 minutes at 400 F.  You can thank me later.

Go BUCKS!

Basking in the wake of mediocrity.....

Denny's picture

'Scarlet-out' doesn't even make sense why do we have to try to be like everybody else :(

Taquitos.

Is it Saturday Yet's picture

I don't mind the fans uniting to show spirit with something like this, but who can tell the two opposing "red" colors apart?

slicksickle's picture

That's probably the point - on tv it will look like all fans are dressed for the scarlet out. I know a couple years ago, Indiana's homecoming against OSU created an atmosphere with more red than what was the norm.

Doc's picture

This is also the game IU uses to take there yearly photo of the stadium for there game day photos.  Namely because it is full and filled with Scarlet ...Crimson.

"Say my name."

Doc's picture

This just goes along with the poor game day experience in Ohio Stadium.  Now, before you guys go all nuclear on me let me explain.  First and formost  TBDBITL is lights out stellar, as are the cheerleaders.  My beef is the "fabricated" cheers the stadium announcer tries to get going.  Like the "Lets Go Bucks" cheer with the North end saying "LETS" and the East and West Sides saying "GO" and South stands saying "Bucks".  During the MSU game they were still out there trying to get it going when the tv timeout was over and I thought MSU was going to hurry up and run a play to before the cheerleaders got off the field.  The no instant replay is retarded and the score board updates are about a quarter later than actual game action.  Don't forget the Buckeye Bounce thingy they are ripping off of Wisky.  Don't even get me started on the $4 dollar waters and the $4.50 hotdogs.

"Say my name."

joel121270's picture

Simply Amazing!

I would give my left n-- to be able to see a game at The Shoe. I'm curious as to how many "poor game day experience" you have had?

Sorry, to me a true Buckeye fan (not implying you aren't) enjoy's the whole atmosphere and doesn't bitch about something like this in public.

Maybe I'm wrong, just sayn.

Is it Saturday Yet's picture

I go to every home game and agree with most of his post. Not to mention the fans that decide to use seriously foul language in front of children, or chant "we want Cooper", or harass the opposing players, even on the worst of teams. Then you see people spending the entire game texting and not watching the game at all. You miss a lot not seeing replays nor being able to hear the announcers.

Kalamazoo Steve's picture

I think the replay issue is out of the school's hands.  I could be wrong, but I seem to remember the NCAA putting a stop to replaying controversial plays in stadiums due to fans lashing out if they feel they got screwed.  Again, not 100% on this.

Is it Saturday Yet's picture

I think you're correct, but it sucks not being able to see what's going on.  You miss alot being in the stands.

CBus660R's picture

At the Illinois game Saturday, they were running replays after every down.  I was in the south endzone.  I would watch the play, then turn around a watch the replay, so I saw everything twice!  LOL  The point being, OSU could show replays every down if the wanted to. 

Doc's picture

Joel, I'm just saying that OSU's game day experience is a little lacking in originality.  They seem to parrot the popular gimmicks other schools in the B1G do and don't come up with their own schtick.  When they do come up with something new it is forced and contrived.

I'm no less a fan if I say there are things they could do better at the stadium on game days.  To me it is more on the administrators not giving a hoot about making it a truly remarkable experience.  The band and the cheerleaders are still the best part.

I've had season tickets since the 2003 season, and had student tickets from 1993-1996.  I don't miss a game for any reason.  Those 7-9 Saturdays spent in the Shoe are some of the best ones for the entire year.

"Say my name."

Wobble in our Shoes's picture

That's another Buckeye FIRST DOWN!

 

Ugh, that was terrible.

TheHumbleBuckeye's picture

Yeah... I much preferred when he would just say "First Down Ohio STATE!"

Tim's picture

The comic book "Scarlet Avenger" thing with Brutus is extremely painful to watch too, and there's a part 1 and part 2 every game.  I really hope it gets dropped after this season.

klfeck's picture

Agreed, I'm not sure there are enough 3 year olds in attendance to justify torturing the rest of us.

Kevin
OH!!!!!
Proud parent of a Senior at The Ohio State University

joel121270's picture

I get it, not saying you aren't a true fan and really not you particularly just you happen to say what I see some people saying sometimes and it drives me nuts. I suppose if I had season tickets I would see your side more, but knowing the fan I am would LOVE to be there each and ever game day if I could. I think the "scarlet out" is a little out there as I like the fact that we never felt the need to do it. It is what it is though.

 

Not trying to call you out, just saying The Shoe is a one of a kind place with tons of history to be appreciated no matter how superficial the business aspect of being there can be.

I believe replays can't be shown right after the play as well from what I know.

Doc's picture

All very valid points. Believe me I'm very Blessed to be able to not only go to every home game, but to have a wife that allows me to go and the ability to afford to go.  The pilgrimage from NWOhio every game day starts as early in the morning as possible and I stay in the stands until the last notes of "Carmen Ohio" have faded away.

I guess I have taken some things for granted.  It really is a special place.  Thanks for reminding me of that fact.

 

Doc 

"Say my name."

cal3713's picture

I miss all the old weird ass shit (somewhat acid inspired) they used to put on the video board... they dropped them maybe 4 years ago for much more generic video board material when they started using a full high-def feed for replays. 

Todd-Not Boeckmann's picture

+1000

 

Why why why do I have to listen to some maroon introduce Hang On Sloopy between the third and fourth quarter?  What, we haven't heard this before?  Its another new tradition like the Carmen Ohio singing by the team?  Nope.  And that aggregious Lets Go Bucks cheer that is just stupid.

We have The Best Damn Band In the Land.  Why are we piping in music during the breaks in action?  Let em play!!!!!!!

On the wall guarding the North Coast from all Weasel invasions.

yrro's picture

I agree 100% on the piped in music.

Doc's picture

The introduction of "Sloopy" is rediculous.  What?  Have we all never been there before?  Let the band play and shut up.  The audio is awful, at least on the East side of the stadium where my seats are(C Deck).

I think there are other stadiums that play replays no matter the situation.  I could be wrong on this, but others have told me this is true.

This year they have statred to show the "highlights" of the previous home games, instead of big plays from the past.  I want to see an Archie run, or a Lauringitis tackle, or Ginns pick six from PSU.  How 'bout Troy, or Eddie, or any of the other Buckeye luminaries.  Showing me Buaserbombs and missed tackles isn't getting me fired up to cheer.

"Say my name."

joel121270's picture

and @ Doc as well...As you can tell from my posts I haven't been to a game in Columbus (been to see them in Evanston twice but that in no way counts). And seeing from the other posts I am sure I would probably be the same way given the opportunity to be able to see them play their on more than one occasion.

I had a deal with God in that all I ever wanted was to see a Championship team from Cleveland (Browns, Indians, Caves only) or TOSU which was granted at the age of 32 in 2002. If I am ever lucky enough to be inside for a live game (toured the outside over the summer) then I will go to my grave a happy man.

I get what you guys are saying so if I came off the wrong way Doc I apologize....

 

As always though....

GO BUCKS!!

Doc's picture

Joel,  what part of our great state do you live in?  Why don't you leave me a message via e-mail, so we don't hog up this Scully.

Doc

"Say my name."

CGroverL's picture

I'm an old dude, have just 2 short years of computer experience, and sometimes get lost  when it comes to lingo. Can you help me out by explaining to me : "What is a 'maroon'?" I have read that it is a misinterpretation of the word "moron". I know what a moron is and often think I am one myself. Is that what maroon meant, in this reference? Thanks. Go Bucks!

"I hope they're last in everything"

Thanks, Urb!

Doc's picture

Yep!  Maroon = Moron

"Say my name."

Tonga Buckeye's picture

Bugs Bunny used to say that all the time.........

"go not where the path may lead, rather go where there is no path and leave a trail"

klfeck's picture

I would like to suggest that in addition to Hang on Sloopy between the 3rd and 4th, we work We don't give a damn for the whole state of Michigan somewhere into the game.

Kevin
OH!!!!!
Proud parent of a Senior at The Ohio State University

Buckeye in Illini country's picture

When I was a student, we always just sang it loud and proud after the game as we were leaving from the south endzone!

Go Bucks! F*ck M!ch!g@n

Class of 2010.

Columbus to Pasadena: 35 hours.  We're on a road trip through the desert looking for strippers and cocaine... and Rose Bowl wins!

Normal Buck's picture

Super Power:  photgraphic memory.  If I could just look at all the crap I have to read every day, take a snapshot quickly, and have total recall of what it said, I could accomplish so much more.  Pretty cool, I know. . .

Doc's picture

You would have to change your moniker "Normal" :)D

"Say my name."

BuddhaBuck's picture

Or Mike Ross from "Suits". (GREAT show)

Don't text while driving.

Nitz25's picture

No disrespect intended... but is Chris Spielman qualified to be a D-coordinator for a school like Ohio State?  I wasn't aware he had much, if any, coaching experience.  We always rag on Siciliano for having no experience as a QB coach, is Spielman much different? At the very least, I don't think he can compete with Heacock, who has proven he can put together an elite unit capable of winning games all by itself (Illinois, and almost MSU) every single year.  Also, Heacock was Urban Meyer's boss years ago at Illinois State.  You think Meyer comes in and replaces his old boss with a guy that has no Div-1A coaching experience at a position as important as D-coordinator? Just sayin...

Also, is Ohio State sure it wants to pay $6 million/year (gotta be one of the highest salaries out there, if not the highest) to a coach who seems conflicted about wanting to coach at a high level?  The high salary screams: "Oh, alright... I didn't really want to deal with all the garbage that goes along with this job again, but if you're going to twist my arm to the tune of $6 million, FINE!"  Not sure that's who we want running the show.

AGL's picture

thanks, that was what i was attempting to say.

Doug Buckles's picture

You are comparing an all american/pro bowl linebacker to a video coordinator?

Ease off heacock's sac, what elite units are you talking about? OSU has fielded good not elite defenses with Heacock. Elite defenses would not get embarrassed by equal talent(florida, lsu, usc) when those opportunities present themselves.

You think because Heacock was his boss that Meyer feels as if Heacock is the bee's knees? Given Meyer's rapid ascension and multiple national titles, I have a feeling he respects and may like Heacock but it would end there.

If you have heard Spiels commentate on games, he knows what he is talking about. I fear a few Bucks fans may associate the cbus destroyers lack of success with Spiels coaching acumen. That is silly.

Nitz25's picture

Being an all-american/pro bowl linebacker does not automatically annoint you a good coordinator.  Position coach? Sure.  Coordinator is a much different type of role.

Where I come from you have to earn a position like D-coordinator at a place like Ohio State.  That means years of experience as a NCAA position coach followed by years of success as a Coordinator at a smaller NCAA program.  Cooper proved himself with a dominant HC career at Tulsa and a successful stint at Arizona State.  Tressel proved himself by winning multiple National Championships with Youngstown State at the D1-AA level.  Spielman has done nothing but take the Columbus Destroyers to a 2-15 season.  I love Spiels both for his on the field contributions and for what kind of a person he is off the field.  However, just because he is a Buckeye legend doesn't mean he should be handed a position as important as D-coordinator when his only experience is in critiquing other NCAA D-coordinators from a booth on live television.

yrro's picture

Actually, great defenses get embarassed against elite talent all the time. Especially when your offense is *not* putting them in a position to succeed. Look at the Steelers/Packers super bowl. Is Dick Lebeau just an average D-coordinator?

Heacock & company have produced the most consistently highest rated defense in the country the last five years. They don't have down years... that's huge. LSU, Alabama, and Florida have had some amazing defenses... when their recruiting classes and seniority lined up right. For Heacock, that's just taken his guys from really good to amazing.

slippy's picture

He coached some arena league...not sure how relevant that is.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater's picture

Agree with your Speilman take, he has proven nothing.   With all due respect, I love Spielman as much as the next guy, but handing him the DC job would be a humongius risk we do not need to take.   Heacock, while not always being as agressive as I would like, has fielded continuous solid defenses.   Ideally, we would get Dantonio back as d-coord, but that obviously isn't happening.   Giving the DC job to an unproven guy is NOT the way to go....and again, I said "with all due respect" (Talledega Nights?  anyone?)....

Doc's picture

You can not get mad at the man.  He said "With all due respect."  It's some sort of law of nature.

"Say my name."

AGL's picture

have not seen the urban news,  what is the source?  speilman as dc ?  again, sources ?  I realize CS is all buckeye but dc for a defense that is playing above avg.  hope whoever does not mess w/D coaches.  oc & qb coaches another story. saw on tbbc Thomas @ fuma commited, but no other info.  just listed as commit.  any news on that?

joel121270's picture

It drives me insane when I see some of these penalties being dished out and yet Devier got 10 games. Didn't know about the Boise St dude and now I am really pissed about what's going on with Devier.

Can someone say if there is more to it than what is being said? Is he being made an example of? Hell, he shoulda just took the "Cam Clause" and said I didn't know anything about it.

 

Un Friggin Real!

slippy's picture

Posey said he didn't know anything about it.  I think the lawyers even said there wasn't a case but OSU did nothing to help him.  From what I hear at least...

misterpants's picture

The moral of the story, I guess, is that, in the eyes of the NCAA, it is worse to violate a rule than it is to violate a law.

cronimi's picture

I never thought of it that way, Mr. Pants, but you're absolutely right.  The NCAA cares more about its often-illogical rules than it does about actual law-breaking.  Yet another reason why the NCAA needs a major overhaul.

Is it Saturday Yet's picture

As a huge self proclaimed comic book nerd I have wrestled with that same superpower question many times. If I cannot have more than one I would have to go with telepathy.

Buckeyejason's picture

The more people say Rod Smith and next Eddie George in the same sentence..the less its going to happen.

6 mill a year for Urban..ehh.

BUCKEYES BABY!

Kalamazoo Steve's picture

Time travel would be my super power, hands down.  That way I could go back and give Springs longer cleats. 

RBuck's picture

You're thinking too low. First I'd go to the past and buy all the Microsoft and Apple stock I could super cheap. Come back and go to the future and grab a 2020 sports almanac and move to Vegas.

"It's just another case of there you are". ~ Doc (1918-2012)

GoBucks713's picture

Will you bring me back a hoverboard?

-The Aristocrats!

BuddhaBuck's picture

Just one Superpower? Superspeed. 

Don't text while driving.

Scott's picture

SEC speed!

Class of 2008

BuckeyeSki's picture

SEC speed > Superhuman Speed

 

Banned from BlackShoeDiaries since 2008. Crime: Slander/Defamation of Character Judgement: Guilty

Doc's picture

I've heard from a very trusted source(I can not say anymore than that) that Urban wants the job in a real bad way.  He is just waiting to see what the NCAA does to us.  Also Spiels would be a position coach and not a coordinator.

"Say my name."

Run_Fido_Run's picture

Urban might be interested in the job, but he doesn't want the job "in a real bad way," if he's waiting to see what the NCAA does. Otherwise, he'd be in it for the long haul, willing to grind out the 1-2 years of sanctions, which would - in his mind - be temporary obstacles on his way to becoming one of the greatest coaches in Ohio State history. 

btalbert25's picture

I can see waiting it out though.  If they are talking about severe sanctions that could set the program back 5 years, then it makes sense to maybe go elsewhere.  He'd be in a no win situation at that point.  I'm not sure what the NCAA is thinking but if there's a 2 year bowl ban and a lot of scholarship losses, then Meyer couldn't get that early success(nextyear) with a ton of talent to buy him a few more years.  If the sanctions are light, and he can come in and use the talent next year and potentially win it all, he'll grab the job in a hurry.

If another huge job in the B1G came open this off season(Penn State), and they didn't have a ton of sanctions facing them, and they had the deep pockets to pay him a boatload of cash, Despite how much he'd love to coach Ohio State, it may make more sense to go into the stable program

That first game against Akron, where he was announcing, I got the sense he was really excited about Braxton Miller and his talent.  We've seen what Urban can do with great QB's, I think he's chomping at the bit to get a chance to coach Braxton and the weapons on this offense.

BuckeyeSki's picture

The ability to change into any animal form at will would be the tits

Banned from BlackShoeDiaries since 2008. Crime: Slander/Defamation of Character Judgement: Guilty

Run_Fido_Run's picture

Not if you live in Zanesville.

BuckeyeSki's picture

Banned from BlackShoeDiaries since 2008. Crime: Slander/Defamation of Character Judgement: Guilty

NW Buckeye's picture

Just don't show up in Zainesville!

Wow, you beat me to this while I was reading the comments. Great minds think alike.

Doug Buckles's picture

Spiels would be fine as a D coordinator. You cannot compare Siciliano to Spiels. Spiels played at the highest level, and as evidenced by his commentary, know wtf he's talking about. I would take Spiels over Heacock any day of the week. Reason being, Spiels would go down with his holsters empty and his defense playing significantly more aggressive then what they do now. For example, when you watch LSU's defense and OSU's defense, tenacity is the biggest difference. That 'balls to the wall, we are going to beat you into the ground' mentality is prevalent in their program. Ohio State's defense is, and has been, good but not great since Hawk and co left.

RBuck's picture

What you just lauded Spiels for was more like motivating and cheerleading. I agree that Chris would be a great motivator, but can he devise a new defensive gameplan and schemes every week? Give me someone with experience or stay the current course.

"It's just another case of there you are". ~ Doc (1918-2012)

Run_Fido_Run's picture

I'm fairly confident that Spiels would be a good positional coach (esp. LBs), but Ohio State expects much more experience and proven results from a prospective DC.

And some of his comments as an analyst are more entertaining and inspiring than they are sensible. In reference to offenses, when he's not repeatedly calling for bombs after seemingly every single turnover, he wants to go for it on 4th down. On defense, he recommends blitz, blitz, blitz.

In other words, all the boring nuances of the game which Tressel understood to be vital to winner or losing . . . Spiels has no appreciation for. That might be emotionally appealing to some fans but, sorry, it's not a recipe for success as a "big picture" coordinator.     

Todd-Not Boeckmann's picture

I want to be invisible (and back in college with all the co-eds!!!! ;)

 

 

On the wall guarding the North Coast from all Weasel invasions.

NW Buckeye's picture

I'm torn between invisibilty and teleapathy. Would love to have both, but would probably opt for the advantages of being unseen. Knowing what everyone is thinking could cause a little overload.

Run_Fido_Run's picture

When I was a young man with inconsistent ethics, I favored invisibility - which is the ideal super power for scoundrels. Of course, one can do a lot of good, "sociall responsible" acts with invisibility, too, but they're more difficult to dream up.

Now my prefered super power would be fluency in all human languages.     

Conroy's picture

Super charisma.  I'd be sitting on the 50 with blondes every Saturday.

Run_Fido_Run's picture

Dude, careful what you wish for. Your super power could easily turn into an Edgar Allen Poe story.

btalbert25's picture

Spielman gives some nice commentary on Defense during games, to the point that some games I'm just thinking ok Spiels please be quiet, I don't need a breakdown of every play.  However, I would think that most guys who played D in the NCAA and NFL would understand plays a defense runs.  I think a lot of people assume because he knows a lot about defense, that he would automatically be a great coordinator and I just don't think those go together hand in hand neccessarily.  Just knowing a lot about a subject doesn't make you a great teacher of that subject.

At the same time, I think Spielman would be a phenominal recruiter.  He's a well known very successful football player, and he's on TV every week now so he's still recognizeable.  Pluse he's very charismatic.  A position coach would be a good start

btalbert25's picture

I would love to fly, that is absolutely the super power I want.  No traffic going to work, I could go places I want to go very quickly, plus I'd be the only badass on earth who could fly. 

Squirrel Master's picture

My superpower would be Play-calling and with one touch Bollman would know how to draw up touchdown making, winning plays!

kind of like a midas touch. drawback would be during love making with my wife she would start spouting off spread formations and bubble screens!

I saw a UFO once.......it told me to have a goodyear!

BuckeyeSki's picture

drawback would be during love making with my wife she would start spouting off spread formations and bubble screens!

That doesn't sound awful....

Banned from BlackShoeDiaries since 2008. Crime: Slander/Defamation of Character Judgement: Guilty

Squirrel Master's picture

Hmmmm.....good point! then all I would need is a sandwich and the game on!

GAME ON! LOL

I saw a UFO once.......it told me to have a goodyear!

Buckeyejason's picture

I agree, I think there's all upside to gettin Spiels as a coach. There's no downside to me..you could say "the lack of coaching experience"..yes but we brought in Vra-bro.

I cant guarentee it..but somehow I think Spiels knows more about the game then Vra-Bro.

BUCKEYES BABY!

Brutus's picture

So let me get this straight, we should always win every game, our coaches should never make mistakes, especially when it comes to calling timeouts, the fans are better coaches than the coaches, Bauserman is the worst human being in Ohio, we should always get the best recruits, and we should offer the most unique, non-hokey stadium experience ever where no one ever swears in front of kids or boos because that doesn't happen in EVERY stadium everywhere.

Yes, I'm being facetious and no I don't think anyone literally believes the above (except for the Bauserman thing). However, I've noticed over the last few weeks that if there is something to complain about regarding OSU football, we will always find a way to do so. And this is why we are among the most hated fan bases in college football.

Commence the bashing.

Maestro's picture

Well said.

Embrace the positive people.

vacuuming sucks

btalbert25's picture

I saw above quite a conversation about game day experience at the stadium, and while piping in music or trying to manufacture cheers is cheesy and hokie, I'd much rather be at a game watching that sitting on my duff watching the game from my couch.  I don't care what level of HD TV's ever get to, or what people say, watching a game on a TV is not just like being there or better than being there. The atmosphere is tremendous.  To be sure there are D-bags spouting obscenities and saying dumb stuff.  Some stuff is ripped off from other stadiums, like 7 nation Army and all that, but it doesn't take away from my experience. There's nothing more amazing than something awesome happening and 105,000 are all going bonkers. 

All stadiums rip stuff off from others.  Go to a Reds game, then go to a game at another stadium.  Everyone has some form of weapon launching T-shirts into the crowd. Every foul ball has the shattering glass song.  Every batter has some walk up to the plate music.  Most have some version of a goofy race.  It doesn't mean I hate the Mr Reds race because Milwaukee has guys dressed like sausages running around.  It's silly, cheesy, goofy etc, but I don't see and hear that stuff and think wow, this has just ruined the game for me.  What makes the game is a guy like Votto blasting a homerun, and hearing the crowd go nuts and feeling the boom of the fireworks.

it's the same for going to a game to me.  The whole day is an experience, capped off with the adrenaline rush that follows a good play and high fiving some stranger next to me.  Feeling the energy in the stadium etc.  Maybe I feel this way because I make it to only 1 game a year if I'm lucky, but I wouldn't trade the feeling and that excitement for any game sitting on my couch

Bucksfan's picture

The whole day is an experience, capped off with the adrenaline rush that follows a good play and high fiving some stranger next to me.

Bravo, sir.  I dumped a sh*t-ton of cash to take my wife to the Rose Bowl.  Cynics say that there's a stupid parade, and a game that no longer means anything.  But you know what?  That's because they've never been there.  We ate it up like it was Disneyland.  We were chatting it up with Buckeye fans that came to Pasadena from all over the country, took over 100 pictures of those floats (which are breathtaking, I must say), serendipitously ran into old friends from OSU, drank in the beer garden, felt the panick of standing in line when you have to pee really bad.  And the best part was high-fiving people I'll never see again after watching Posey GO OFF.

Oh yeah, and seeing your team win the Rose Bowl at sunset in Pasadena has to be one of the most beautiful and rare sporting experiences in the country.  

You can't get any of this by watching it on TV.

Buckeye in Illini country's picture

Nothing much beats watching Ohio State beat the Ducks in Pasadena!  Starting Stadium OHIO in the Rose Bowl was pretty sweet.

 

 

Columbus to Pasadena: 35 hours.  We're on a road trip through the desert looking for strippers and cocaine... and Rose Bowl wins!

Kalamazoo Steve's picture

Ditto.  Couch goose bumps just aren't the same as stadium goose bumps. 

Is it Saturday Yet's picture

Agreed. But I have to call that other stuff out. High-fivin' strange bros after some amazing play is great.

Doc's picture

Completely agree with all the above posts.  Nothing like being there for sure.  the other things are just small distractions.

"Say my name."

buckeye20's picture

Spielman could be a defensive coordinator at Ohio State in his sleep.  While he was awake he could be head coach.

Maestro's picture

Yes, he really tore up the Arena League didn't he. To the tune of a 2-15 record. Solid.

vacuuming sucks

Ethan's picture

This is hands down the best Skull Session I've read on this site. Bravo Jeremy!

The clause with Gruden is very interesting. I had always thought he was more of a "fanboy" candidate than an actual candidate with interest, but you don't list Ohio State in a clause unless you'd consider an offer. Between him and Urban Meyer, (and if Urban, possibly Spielman too), we'd have some dynamite recruiters coming in. 

I think the DC job is too much for someone who has yet to get their feet wet, either as a DC at a smaller D-1 school or as a position coach at a big time D-1 program. Somebody else said to make Spielman the LB coach first, and let him kill it on the recruiting trail. I think that's probably the best option. 

My superpower would be the ability to make other people pee their pants whenever I felt like it.

Jeremy Birmingham's picture

Thank you for the compliment.  I am glad that you enjoyed it.

Is it Saturday Yet's picture

Seeing all kinds of Urban rumors circulating my twitter feed....some saying something happening at Duke BBall game?

AC1972's picture

Geez.  all these posts and not many comments on superpowers.  I've thought a long time about it, and I think my superpower would be to be better than everyone at anything.

Best track speed? check

Marksmanship? check

Throwing a football? check

Ninja skills? check

Math skills? check

Bedroom skills? check

U name it and I would be the best at it. kinda like the most interesting guy in the world dude.

That way I can be super human, but not reallly have to hide my powers, plus make a ton of bank in professional sports and endorsements.  uh, and help all of humankind, too.

William's picture

Are you Kenny Powers?

klfeck's picture

"rumors that none other than Chris Spielman has been working Meyer's ear in the hopes that Urban would bring Spielman along as the Buckeyes next defensive coordinator"

 

Would you be willing to whisper that into the phone using a sultry voice?

Kevin
OH!!!!!
Proud parent of a Senior at The Ohio State University

Buckeye_Mafia's picture

I think IF Meyer did come and coach, he SHOULD retain a few members of the coaching staff. I would keep Fickell, Vrabel, Drayton, and maybe Heacock. I would also make #walrus stick around and be forced to watch the offense actually perform for two seasons so we can see his head explode on HDTV (or in the stands).

Adolphus Washington is half grizzly bear and half dragon | Noah Spence kills quarterbacks, just to watch them die.

William's picture

This I agree with.

jfrank373's picture

After watching the game Saturday I couldn't help but think what might of been if we had Boom and Hall for the Miami, Michigan State, and Nebraska games. Posey isn't missed because we don't throw and Pryor is not much of an upgrade from Braxton at QB. All Pryor ever did was throw wobbly ducks at the feet of wide open receivers. 

I think Boom would have been the difference. This team is about ball control and keeping the D fresh. I'll be jacked next week at the Wisconsin game. Payback is a b****.

Buckeye in Illini country's picture

While not a great thrower, Pryor would have been much better for the Buckeyes this season than Braxton currently is.

Columbus to Pasadena: 35 hours.  We're on a road trip through the desert looking for strippers and cocaine... and Rose Bowl wins!

Buckeyejason's picture

Was that a serious comment about Pryor not being an upgrade from Miller?

That had to be the dumbest thing I've read on here.

And we did have Hall for Miami and Nebraska FYI.

With Pryor and Posey we wouldve won the Miami, Nebraska, and Michigan State game hands down.

BUCKEYES BABY!

jfrank373's picture

Pryor was very overrated. I remember when he signed and everybody was thinking multiple championships. But then we saw how much of a project he was and he never developed into the superstar we thought he would be. Penn State, Wisconsin, USC, all games that a superstar quarterback wins. He was more of a liability than anything. He was good in the Oregon game but the prayer he threw up to Jake Ballard was all Jake.

btalbert25's picture

Without Pryor this team doesn't win the Rose Bowl, or last year's Sugar Bowl.  They don't even make it to the Sugar Bowl because Iowa would've beat them last year.  He kept hitting the receivers with great passes in that game and they kept dropping them, so he took the gam in his own hands and won it. 

We don't have to love Pryor, but when all is said and done he was won of Ohio State's better QB's of all time.  Maybe not the best passer all time, but with him at QB this team was pretty damn good. 

Baroclinicity's picture

I couldn't disagree more.  Best QB ever at Ohio State?  Who knows.  30-4, or whatever it was, speaks volumes.  Liability?  Like on that 4th and 20 against Iowa last year?  And Pryor wasn't on the field on that last USC drive when they were pinned deep and they ran for a first down.  Not saying he was perfect, but so far from a liability. 

Denny's picture

'Pryor was very overrated.'

False.

Taquitos.

buckeye20's picture

Majorly False.  Helluva an athlete...solid QB...very adequate passer.

Buckeye in Athens's picture

I don't care what other people's expectations for Pryor were, but I think the state of the program right now without Pryor is a testament to how important and special of a player he was. If we had Pryor right now, there is no doubt in mind that we'd be undefeated and in the top 5 in the country. Yes, he may not have won those big games, but what about the ones he did, where he put the entire team on his back (more like his feet) and willed us to victory? 4th down scramble against Iowa, Oregon, Arkansas - the kid was good and this team misses him. 

klfeck's picture

One of the most successful QB's of all time at tOSU and he didn't play his senior year or have a real QB coach. Just imagine.....

Kevin
OH!!!!!
Proud parent of a Senior at The Ohio State University

Buckeyejason's picture

Yes Pryor was/is overrated, I won't deny that. But to say that he's about the same talent Miller is right now is straight idiotic.

People said he'd win multiple championships and heisman's..that's fantasy thinking, realistically how many big time recruits come in and do that?

BUCKEYES BABY!

BuckeyeSki's picture

So I realize that this is nothing new, and shame on me for even visting the WWL on the web, but eSECpn has a lengthy article discussing the fact that Fickell is getting $775k for this year's contract and is in no way guaranteed a perm coaching spot. It then goes on to rehash all the penalties and infractions over the last year.

Then I click on the LSU suspensions, where a sentence is written stating the players names and the reason. Then 3 paragraphs on how LSU is so deep that they shouldn't be missed too badly against Auburn. What a joke

Banned from BlackShoeDiaries since 2008. Crime: Slander/Defamation of Character Judgement: Guilty

DJ Byrnes's picture

Pryor was many things, overrated not one of them.

Californian by birth, Marionaire by the Grace of President Warren G. Harding.

jfrank373's picture

Nothing from last year matters because he went and played golf for free and sold all of his awards for tattoos, cash, and cars. Oh yeah, he also went to a now show job that he got for himself and other players. He took a huge shit all over the rich tradition and history of the greatest program in college sports and cost our coach, the best coach in modern Buckeye times his job. I don't know about you but I could give a shit less about a good Iowa game or last year's Sugar Bowl that technically doesn't exist. He's not a Buckeye. And that really isn't debatable either because he is banned from the school.

Baroclinicity's picture

And that's fine, but it has nothing to do with his performance on the field.  To say that, on the field, playing the game of football he was liability makes zero sense.

flipbuckeye's picture

This.

Hate on dude for what he's done off the field, but you can't really deny that he's one of the better QBs OSU has ever fielded and how crucial he was to this offense.

jfrank373's picture

It has a lot to do about what happens on the field. That's the thing. Everyone says it's off the field matters but that says a lot about the kind of person you are and it make everyone on the team resent you. Everyone on the team is saying how they feel like they actually have a team this year. Tressel put him in precise opportunities to make a play. If we never recruited Pryor who knows who our quarterback might of been, and we would still have our coach and our integrity.

Baroclinicity's picture

You're back tracking.  I'm not trying to put you in your place or call you out, but that post talked about on the field performance only, and the fact that he should have won certain games that were losses.  Then you called him a liability on the field, which I'm saying is far from accurate.  If you combine the whole package that includes his actions off the field and his 5 cent head, it's a different argument.  That is not the way this discussion began, however.

Denny's picture

'I could give a shit less about a good Iowa game of last year's Sugar Bowl that technically doesn't exist'.

Technically, we all have memories. In our brains. And on hard drives. And really, there are lots of things that one could argue that 'technically don't exist' that people give lots of shits about. But instead of going further down that rabbit hole, I'll just leave this:

Taquitos.

jfrank373's picture

Not going to argue Pryor's physical attributes, the guy is straight up gifted. But a lot of times its about what you have between the ears. Take a look at the NFL. The talent at that level is seperated by decision making and being a team player. Terrelle Pryor has never or will ever put others in front of himself. I know its a rumor, but it all over the web that he scored a 7 on his Wonderlic. Wow.

Denny's picture

The reply button really wants to be your friend, brah. Use it. Learn it. Love it.

But mostly, use it.

Taquitos.

flipbuckeye's picture

I would like to politely extend this offer to BuckeyeJason as well. Been bugging me for days.

/anal

Buckeyejason's picture

I did it! Can you believe it!? I hit reply!

LOL..no but seriously I usually make it a point to hit reply when trying to add to the conversations.

Sorry to make it confusing or unorganized.

BUCKEYES BABY!

btalbert25's picture

SO sucessful NFL players have wonderful talent, do the right thing on the field, think of their team first, and have it between the ears?  I can think of plenty of guys who were HOF type players who were Morons, never did the right thing on or off the field, and only cared about themselves. 

Michael Vick, Michael Irvin, Brett Favre, Lawrence Taylor, Ray Lewis, and that's just a few off the top of my head.

Look Pryor screwed up, so did other players who were caught and punished, and I'm willing to bet there are quite a few who weren't caught that have been acting up and breaking NCAA rules as well.  I'm not giving him a pass for that stuff, but people had ridiculous expectations set for the kid on the field, which he damn near met.  It's not his fault they didn't win multiple titles, but they were really good in his tenure.  If Boeckman, Bauserman, or Guiton are your QB instead of Pryor, 30-4 with 2 BCS wins and a 3rd one that was a dropped INT away from a win, just doesn't happen.

BuckeyeChief's picture

HEY HEY HEY, LT wasn't selfish. It took alot for him to drag himself out on the field after a 24 hr bender and grab multiple sacks. He was selfish to his family.

 

"Clutch has no boundaries"

biggy84's picture

The national media sensationalized the infractions that Pryor and company committed. The media has shaped the public perception that the offenses were terribly immoral and reckless. The violations NEVER were of the serious nature! Anyone who chooses to be a lemming to what espin has to say is losing sight of what these players actually did....which is not much. 

William's picture

You mean getting a deal on some tats, selling some personal belongings and getting some rounds of free golf here and there isn't a terrible offense.

jfrank373's picture

I agree that some of the offenses are marginal, but the rules are the rules and unfortunately he had no regard for them.  I also think there's more to come. There's a reason he left school back in May and it's because he was going to be suspended for the whole year. He took fluff jobs and got paid like some of the others. You seriously think he could afford the cars he drove? You think other players saw that and wanted to get a piece of the pie? Add strong leadership skills to his resume.

btalbert25's picture

The reason took part in it is because everyone took part in it.  He didnt' lead other players astray this kind of crap has been going on for years.  We all want to think kids choose to come to Ohio State because they love the atmosphere and the campus, or the games are so much fun when they come on visits, and maybe some of it has to do with that, but they are all getting benefits from the get go.  Boosters here, sluts there, and parties everywhere.  That's what makes official visits so much fun, they get cash, drinks, sex, and great meals.  It happens everywhere, it's been documented everywhere by former players and recruits.

Pryor didn't lead anyone else to trouble, they all fell into it the minute they started getting recruited.

biggy84's picture

Agreed BT! It wasn't like the players were pillaging the community or point shaving. The ncaa themselves agree that the rules are archaic and need overhauled. Mark May wants people to believe these guys were terrible, and sadly, people do. How many people actually understand how minor these offenses were?

BuckeyeChief's picture

Superpower wise, I would either have super speed, or be Iceman. Trust me on this, when I was going to Ohio State I worked at the airport, and we played this X-men board game on break. Iceman was unstoppable; whoever drew him as a player won damn near everytime.

 

"Clutch has no boundaries"

buckeye20's picture

For those that weren't  alive when Spielman played at Ohio State and the NFL don't know how he''s wired.  To think he couldn't be a coordinator at Ohio State is absurd.  There isn't anyone that has as much knowledge/experience as he does (Vrabel I'm sure is great too)  Either one of them would be great.  Heacock?  Give me a break.  He doesn't run anything.  Figurehead.

Never was a gieant Gruden fan, but the more I think of it...the excitement he would bring to Ohio State would be unreal and what a recruiter he would be.