Tuesday Skull Session

By Johnny Ginter on July 12, 2011 at 6:00a
This is how the sequel to Encino Man starts

Happy Tuesday everyone, and welcome to your morning Skull Session. Busy day yesterday! Mike Vrabel was officially announced as the new Linebackers Coach for the football team, ESPN decided to sue Ohio State in an effort to get their hands on the whispered nothings between Jim Tressel and Ted Sarniak, and I went outside for about five seconds and almost melted to the pavement in what in retrospect would have been a hilarious parody of the Wicked Witch of the West from the Wizard of Oz. Or maybe Juge Doom.

In any case, hopefully today will be less unbearably hot (DOUBT IT!), less litigious (MAYBE IF I'M LUCKY!), and just as filled with former NFL players motivating you to within an inch of your life (NOT LITERALLY!). Also tonight is the MLB All-Star Game, so maybe if the recursive insanity of Jim Tressel/Tatgate scandal eating its own tail like an ESPN Ouroboros gets to be too much for you, flip it on over there and watch some grizzled frowny guys chase a small white ball in an exhibition game that shouldn't matter but totally does for some reason.

Back To Vrabel Boston.com has a nice rundown of statements pertaining to Mike Vrabel, his retirement, and his hiring by Ohio State. We've posted some comments from his longtime teammate Teddy Bruschi, but this article also includes comments from Chiefs GM Scott Pioli, Patriots owner Robert Kraft, and El Capitan himself, Bill Belichick (as seen to your right in the Buckshots).

Not too bad. Oh, and also this is pretty great, too.

Warning Signs In Oregon Chocolate Chip Kelly has had a fairly rocky road to navigate during his tenure as the Oregon head football coach. Surely he would've liked it to be far more vanilla than it has been; ripples and swirls of success have been coupled with scandal and student misconduct. But through it all it has always seemed that he, being the cherries jubilee on top of a burgeoning college football superpower, could ride out any rainbow sherbet of gossip. Okay that last one didn't make any sense.

Anyway, the reason Kelly should be concerned is because if recent history has taught us anything, it's that once the Trustees start to circle the wagons, there is a better than decent chance that the sports coach is going to be left on the outside looking in. And that's exactly what's happening at Oregon. Currently the members of the board are saying all the right things ("We just want the facts," "Nothing has changed," etc.), but if I were a coach who had paid $25,000 dollars for access to players and then left a goofy note trail proving it, I would start figuring out some backup plans for employment.

This Should be Interesting In case there was any doubt, Jim Tressel will be at the August 12th hearing in front of the NCAA infractions committee. Like others on this site, I agree with the idea that the NCAA has to have already gotten their hands on any communication between Ted Sarniak and Tressel, the last largely unknown piece of this puzzle. Because of that it's probably unlikely that those e-mails will come up at the hearing.

What will be more interesting is to see how Jim Tressel reacts to being the scapegoat. To save its own hide, OSU has turned Tressel into a pariah, and which would be a bitter pill for anyone to swallow. But that's the thing about Jim Tressel; we already know what he's going to say and how he's going to act. Because he's the hero Columbus deserves, but not the one it needs right now.

So we'll vilify him. Because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector in a sweatervest. A dork knight.

Swisssshhhhh I am a Reds fan. Sometimes I don't like to admit it, and hedge my bet by saying I'm a baseball fan instead, and when I do it allows me to post news like this with impunity:

Ohio State will be joining a growing list of college baseball teams that play on artificial turf. AstroTurf GameDay Grass is being installed at Bill Davis Stadium and should be ready by the time the Buckeyes begin fall practice. New York Yankees outfielder Nick Swisher, who was a two-time all-Big Ten player for Ohio State, provided a generous donation to get the project started.

Nick Swisher is about the coolest baseball ex-Buckeye that you could ever dream up, and him doing this is pretty kickass. High fives all around. Not you, A-Rod. You suck.

John Legend, Lookin' Goooooooood You saw the front of the jersey, BUT DID YOU SEE THE BACK?? Hey John Legend, if you're reading this, I'm moving up to C-Bus soon, and I'm just saying, it'd be really cool if we could be OSU b-ball bros. You know, superstars of the recording industry and semi-popular niche blogging world, together at courtside, rubbing elbows with the likes of Les Wexner and a guy whose dad knows a dude. It'd be awesome.

Just think about it man. That's all I'm asking. Just think about it.

(call me)



GoBucks713's picture

Why won't John Legend sing the National Anthem at all OSU BBall games? Maybe we should get him to donate to the team instead of that DBag LeBald? Took his services to South Beach, but left his hairline in Cleveland.

-The Aristocrats!

Hoff_TBDBITL's picture

I think we should sue ESPN for the damages they caused to Frank Cosenza's sousaphone during the 09 USC Game as well as for the piss poor TV coverage that our band got during halftime at the Rose Bowl when compared to Oregon's coverage.

T-Row, The Row, The Quality Row!

AcrossTheField11's picture

"So we'll vilify him. Because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector in a sweatervest. A dork knight."

Brilliant. Seriously... Brilliant.  Although it is too bad its Urban Meyer who looks more like Christian Bale.

Time and change will surely show how firm they friendship... O-HI-O.

DarthSweaterVest's picture

I agree, the dork knight line is destined to go down in history. 


Ethan's picture

Agree 100%. The best line I've ever read on this site. 

Denny's picture

"It's not who I am, but how many times I run Dave that defines me" — Jim 'Dork Knight' Tressel


flipbuckeye's picture

You either retire the hero or coach long enough to see yourself become the villain.

Johnny Ginter's picture

that's what i'm sayin man. all summer, that's the premise i've been working with

Kyle's picture

How about America files a class-action lawsuit for the rip-roaring awfulness and douchebagery that is Chris Berman and his annoying-to-the max over-the-top catch phrases that haven't been slightly amusing and/or cool since '94.  If one man can ruin a cool sporting event, it is the fatty with the baritone voice, cheap shirts, worse ties and awful catch phrases.  I know ESPN has some vendetta against OSU but I'm starting to think they also have some vendetta against the American sports fan.

zbd's picture

Freedom of information act is for everyone except OSU.  Is there a Nixon ghost working the halls around the oval?   OSU is another hypocrite just like Tressel in teaching fairness and following the law.  They act like a big bully.....I hope the NCAA bans them from bowl games and takes scholarships away.  

cronimi's picture

Good morning, Troll....

AcrossTheField11's picture

I wish your parents had banned you from eating lead paint chips. 

Time and change will surely show how firm they friendship... O-HI-O.

Oakland Buckeye's picture

Thanks for another scUM idiotic rant. you probably graduated with Larry Foote & his 10 yr ban... I love these posts that show the (lack of) intelligence & objectivity in Anal Harbor.

anchorman's picture

Too bad his mother didn't abort him!

btalbert25's picture

Dork Knight lol, that's great stuff.  I think Tressel will accept his role as scapegoat well.  He has done it since March for the most part.  I don't know if he told anyone in compliance or gave the information to Gene Smith or not, but even when the university "supported him completely" they were still pinning it all on Tressel.  The university really couldn't do anything but fire him or convince him to resign after the car story broke and then the SI article came out.  At that point they had to part ways.  Tress already took most of the bullets.  When he goes to the hearing in August, he's just going to take a couple more.

Maestro's picture

I do look forward to reading his take on the events one day.  Or perhaps seeing them in a candid interview.  Will be very interesting.

vacuuming sucks

BuckeyeSki's picture

Encino Man 2: Wheezin' the Ju-uice. Summer 2012


Banned from BlackShoeDiaries since 2008. Crime: Slander/Defamation of Character Judgement: Guilty

AngelHeartsBuckeyes's picture

John Legend (not his real last name, its actually Stevens), went to my high school.  I believe he graduated at sixteen because he was one of those uber-smart kids.

Anyway, just thought I'd share.

Buckeye born and bred. Buckeye til I'm dead.

Pam's picture

Went to Penn, home to the uber-smart kids.  I have a HUGE crush on him. I think if we met, he would drop his GF for me

NoVA Buckeye's picture

The MLB all star game determines home field advantage in the world series

The offseason begins when your season ends. Even then there are no days off.

WestCoastBuckeye's picture

This just in from ESPN. Ohio State offers Illegal benefits to John Legend in Corrupt recruiting scheme. Possible attempt to sell his soul to the devil in the exchange unknown at this point but highly suspected.

Todd-Not Boeckmann's picture

Being a Lord of the Rings nerd (book moreso than the films), I prefer to think of JT as Strider the Ranger.  Silently and faithfully guarding The Shire from all things weaselish despite being vilified with prejorative names.  Of course, that story ends well.  Hopefully this one will too.

On the wall guarding the North Coast from all Weasel invasions.

Is it Saturday Yet's picture

But not Aragorn rightful heir and king, but Strider who was ready to steep to using ghosts to win his fight for good.

Olentangy's picture

johnny you had me rolling through this whole post. bravo!!

"semi-popular niche blogging world..." classic lol

How firm thy friendship