PHONE'S RINGING -- IT'S URBAN ON THE LINE
It's that time again. Truly exceptional captions might even earn a t-shirt.
Damn these leaky Depends!
Ohio is going to own my butthole.
I see you on here a lot, you seem pretty smart.
At first the head coach thought he smelled a fart, but then realized it was simply the current state of Michigan football that caught his attention. "Besides," he quickly reasoned, "no fart has ever smelled that bad."
To err is human. Really sucking requires having yellow stripes on your helmet.
"Yeah, I'd do Betty:"
"I'll get those Duke boys!"
I just heard me some Josh Groban. That man can raise me up too!
Fundamentals are a crutch for the talentless.
There are approximately 7000 pinstripes on this jacket.
"Wait! All I have to do is win 4 games a season?" "And you'll pay me millions of dollars?" "I should really get Rich Rodriguez a thank you present"
"I am thrilled and delighted to announce that they opened up a $7.95 Chinese Buffet across from Michigan Stadium!" Brady Hoke
Two blondes were driving to Disneyland. The sign said: Disneyland Left... So they started crying and headed home.
...And when we win the game, We'll buy a keg of booze....And we'll drink to old Ohio til we wobble in our shoes...
+1 all you can eat too!
"Well...this is another fine mess you've gotten us into, Stanley."
"I'm sorry, Ollie."
Upboat! Nice reference!
TV announcer: "Fatty Arbuckle was arrested today and charged with the rape and murder of actress Virginia Rappe. Arbuckle's lawyers said in a statement...wait. What was that??? That's not Fatty Arbuckle? You sure? It's who??? Brady Hoke? Who the fuck is Brady Hoke?!?!?!?!"
"Why yes...I am wearing my Justin Bieber Underoos today. He is a fine looking young man and I would be privileged to share my bed...er, I mean my bag of Doritos with him."
"After that, the sisters never bothered Andy again."
"Damn, I got out-coached by a %#@&*! co-defensive coordinator"!
"It's just another case of there you are". ~ Doc (1918-2012)
Don't text while driving.
"I knew I shouldn't have spent last night at Greg Oden's house"
"You mean I get my own Rascal Scooter and I don't have to climb any stairs to get to my office"
"Man, these Meechegun boys are hot...err I mean girls...meh."
Yes, am trying to hide my chins!
"We have always had the best damn band in the land, now we have the best damn team in the land"- Jim Tressel 1-03-03
I look like John Goodman!
Fan of bacon since 1981
"Not only do I have multiple chins...I have multiple cheeks as well."
I'm not realy a football coach, but I did stay at a holiday inn express last night.
I will have the enchilada platter with two tacos and no guacamoles.
+1...Super Troopers!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!
"Y'know what? I just watched that "Two Girls, One Cup" video last night. I don't know what all the fuss is about. I just got a hankering for a Frosty from Wendy's."
"That's right, I said Ohio. Just Ohio!"
App State, we're coming for you!
Tell Larry David I'm ready to start filming season 9.
That's it. That's who he looks like.
I can't believe I landed my dream job, working for the head of Domino's! I am really going to burn them on that all the pizza I can eat clause in my contract!
Thought Brady Hoke, as he looked beyond Bo's Big Ten Championship banners.... "Someday I, too, will have multiple heart attacks".
Is it just me or does Hoke look like the Chef from Ernest Goes to Camp?
Definetly...or pizza the hut
I heard he moonlights as a wrestler
If Denard Robinson isn't careful with spooning all that food into his mouth, he's going to end up lookin' like Whoopi Goldberg
Pizza is going to send out for YOU!
"I'm just a simple man that loves smelling my own farts."
Damn I miss San Diego already. What the hell am I doing here?
I can't wait til the bring back Roasanne so I can reprise my role as Dan Connor.
Banned from ATO since June 3rd 2PMish PST
We think WAYYY too much alike
HA! I just scrolled up and saw yoru comment.
(in Rosanne voice) "daannnnnnn"
They have no idea I masterbate into a sweatervest...
Cause I couldn't go for three
They have no idea I masterbate cry white tears into a sweatervest...
Maybe if I purse my lips long enough they won't notice the Herpes.
Think. Think. Think. Where did I put my car keys?
Wonder what's Laura making for dinner tonight? Hope it's meatloaf. I like meatloaf.
What's the name of that song, "Paradise by the something something"? That's a good song.
Damn, stop thinking about meatloaf! I've got to give a speech to this M Club group. OK. Beat Ohio. Restore pride. Yeah, I got this.
Hey, my keys are in my pocket! Yeah, I got this.
I need to watch that movie this weekend.
Starring Luke Fickell
Will we be .500 this year? - you betcha!
Tressel you coward, I hate I have to take this pinned up aggression out on Luke Fickell, I like little Lukey".
We got beef...You get your goons and I will bring mines, all 109,901 of them....
what's pinned up agression?
I'd explain it, but I'd ruin the last ten minutes of The Shawshank Redemption.
Brooks was here
That's okay, Bob, this one's just fibrillations. I just gotta limit my pork intake to 400 grams a day.
Yeah well the doc says I got a piece of Polish sausage lodged in the lining of my heart.
Yes, I can do a mole impression
"Oops, I crapped my pants"
"Only took 37 dicks to get to the top....of mediocrity..."
In a row?
+1 for Clerks reference
I think my ass is jealous from all that shit thats been coming of of my mouth about a M!chig@n resurrection.
How does something so round have such a pointy nose? It's like the Jack In The Box character.
"WHERE'S YOUR SHITTER? I've got a turtle-head poking out! I'm not kiddin I've got a crap on deck that could choke a donkey. Aww, it's SQUIDGY. Christ, I'm gettin' all emotional from it, ya know?"
I've got a turd honking for the Right of Way
Sticks and stones, sticks and stones.
Nappy, this is the Internet, not 'Nam. There are rules.
What do you mean brought it bowling, Dude? I didn't rent it shoes. I'm not buying it a fucking beer. He's not taking your fucking turn, Dude.
He IS smelling what the Rock is cooking, and he likes it a bit too much.
Crap, these fans can't even spell "maize" and I have to lead these losers!
" their first 4 choices for this job don't fill out a suit like this"
Proud winner of the Golden Corral loyalty program
They gave him his very own Monogramed Burlap Bib.
Good ones 713!
Who says hiring Flounder from Animal House wasn't the next-best option after Jim Harbaugh? Dave Brandon is a genius!
"You win with people." - Woody Hayes
Yes! They eliminated Jim Tressel!
"Damn right it was me. Don't flush it until Greg sees it."
Would you like a wafer thin mint, sir.
Just one waaffer thin mint?
I don't want a large farva. I want a goddamn litre o' cola!
Litre is french for give me my *uckin cola before I break VOUS *UCKIN LIP
somebody has a bo-neerrrrr
he should tuck it in his waistband. It hides it AND it feels awesome.
Trying my hardest to not laugh at my defense
I bet that Fickell guy can do 2 cock pushups
uhh... derp? Oh no! They're sure to fire me for saying that!... as long as I don't make a bowl game or beat Ohio State. Yeah, that'll make up for that.
Notice that he has the jawline of the "Forever Alone" meme?
WHAT JAW LINE?!?!?!
Totally. Calling all 11W artists...
forever ahoke ;_;
THAT. IS. BRILLIANT.
Jozy, I'm glad you did this. I always have wanted to learn how to use photoshop so I could do this. Thank you for completing my dream.
arrrgh.....White Castle was a bad choice.
The height of human desire is what wins, whether it's on Normandy Beach or in Ohio Stadium.
"...And that's how I earned the handle, 'neckbeard the ass-pie'"
"Okay -- I've got an El Camino full of rampage here."
Is this as happy as we're going to be regarding football for awhile, ripping on how some guy looks? Kinda middle schoolish!!
Seeing as how you've been a member for all of a day, caption photo days are a welcome diversion pretty much every single week. If you can't have a sense of humor, don't know what to tell ya.
I don't have a caption but I imagine this is close to what a whale's vagina actually looks like.
Whales have vaginas?! WTF?
I'm gonna bad mouth those Buckeyes 'till we beat 'em!
I guess they'll have to call it the "not-so-Big House" now
This is the last time I am going to eat Meijers sushi.
Damn I slipped up and said Ohio St. God what an awful taste"...
that's only part of OSU you're tasting....
Do you make a habit of putting nuts in you mouth?
My lobotomy scar is healing nicely!
I'm picking up where Llloyd left off.
I hope no one finds out it was me that left the upper-decker in dave brandon's office bathroom!!!!
Hoke hires brother, Delbert, to run the new 'go blue' D
Jabba thinks your fat
Definitely should have gone with boxers, these briefs are cutting off the circulation to my hoke-n-berries.
Yabba dabba douche.
"I accomplished a lot today. Signed a new recruit and cut the pensions of thousands of over paid New Jersey school teachers. It's hard living this double life, but someone's got to do it."
And we'll drink to old Ohio, 'Til we wobble in our shoes!
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