Move over, A-Rod: There's a new alpha centaur on the block, and he didn't need steroids injected his ass-cheeks to get there.

Twitter user @TeddyHeisman asked for someone to photoshop Cardale Jones onto a Centaur's body. @MarrionCobretti answered the call, and this may inspire me to finally learn how to Photoshop:

The damsel, undoubtedly a princess just rescued by our hero, Centaur King Dolodale, is the icing on the cake for me.