The Situational: Awwwwwwwkward

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SkoBux's picture

But then Chris Rock - not that Chris Rock - arrived in Ann Arbor right around the time Zach Boren was finishing up in Columbus

I work with C Rock and cannot tell you how many new people ask him questions re: his shared celebrity name. Very akin to the Michael Bolton scene in Office Space. Pretty cringe worthy but he's a good dude and takes each question like it's the first time he's heard it.

At last, Kerry had cracked open his first Red Bull with an impatient delight. And the rest, as they say, was history.

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BTBuckeye's picture

Confession: I did not know Gary Moeller graduated from Ohio State. I read that line like 5 times. 

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AZ Buckeye13's picture

Moeller ended up at TTUN because he was on Bo's staff at Miami of Ohio. 

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Keyser Soze's picture

My dad was on Bo's staff at Miami. He never went after being a head coach because he saw Bo working 110 hr weeks and said to himself I would rather be home to pass the ball with my boys and went to work in the corporate world instead. 

That's how winners play. We convince the other guy he's making all the right moves.

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GoBuckeyes1020's picture

Not only an Ohio State grad but a football team captain....true michigan man, just like Bo

The pain of discipline or the pain of regret, take your pick

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chicagobuck38's picture

I'm old enough and still bitter from being at tOSU in the late '80's, and I read it multiple times and then googled his name.  Wow.

Amazing story, definitely a keeper.

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dan_isaacs's picture

upset the Facebook commenters - whom research shows passionately comment on articles they haven't read millions of times daily.

Offer also available on Twitter!

Dan Isaacs

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Silver Sniper's picture

Epic Quote Alert:

While that seems odd, its weirdness will be challenged tomorrow at the practice facility when the tape rolls on the highlight video from last November's rivalry clash while everyone gets presented with jewelry as two coaches who were on the receiving end of that beating get to savor the moment.

I applaud you, Ramzy. 

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jamesrbrown322's picture

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed, is more important than any other one thing." - Abraham Lincoln

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jamesrbrown322's picture

please vaccinate your children.

Well, now you did it Ramzy. You called down the thunder, hope you’re ready for the anti-vaxxer boom! 

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed, is more important than any other one thing." - Abraham Lincoln

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Steelydan54's picture

Must admit that this is the weirdest coaching transition in my memory, due in large part to the Twilight Zone that was Buckeye Football 2018-19, and the ascendency of Ryan Day from "interim" to full on "First Time Head Coach".  Seems like we are all unrealistically hopeful and yet absolutely certain that we are in for an "upgrade" from the "most excellent legend of Urban Meyer".  Go figure. 

Steelybuck54

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IBLEEDSCARLETANDGRAY's picture

One of the good things (maybe the only good thing) on Twitter is you get to see the faces of the shitbags who make ignorant comments. Will be easier to point them out in public and laugh at how stupid they look.

"You're the patron saint of the totally effed" - Hot Tub Time Machine

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Lighteyes's picture

Do people who spend their time complaining on Twitter about articles they haven't read actually go "out in public"?

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IBLEEDSCARLETANDGRAY's picture

Judging by how ugly some of those douchebags are I would guess not.

"You're the patron saint of the totally effed" - Hot Tub Time Machine

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MaineStrength's picture

The Mattison transition is an interesting one.  I've found the very same OSU fans singing his praises pointing out his performance on the other sideline as a punchline.  I can see this is a difficult concept to wrestle with.  The modern world is a complex place.

Strength equipment is expensive & guarantees you nothing. A strong will is free & will give you everything you need.

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ANOTHERMICHIGANLOSS's picture

The general consensus that I have seen for years for a punchline at Michigan has not been on the defensive side of the ball, it has been their ineptitude to produce a formidable offensive attack.  Basically Tresselball of the modern college football world which just doesn't work any more.

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Dstacify's picture

Agreed. Not to mention Mattison has proven over the years to be a top-level recruiter (one of the best in the country in fact) and during the Hoke years in AA regularly fielded strong defenses (including turning things around immediately in 2011 from Greg Robinson's disastrous run as DC under RichRod). I think the combination of him and Hafley together will benefit this defense greatly (as opposed to the combination of Schiano and Grinch last year which was problematic due to Grinch having an ego and being unwilling to accept a co-DC title). Plus Mattison's D-lines have put a lot of players into the NFL since he's been D-line Coach (Maurice Hurst, Taco Charlton, Ryan Glasgow, Chris Wormley, Willie Henry, Rashan Gary and Chase Winovich to come). The most of I've heard of criticism towards Mattison's D-line work is on Gary underachieving last season and that may be more due to Gary playing hurt most of the year than anything.

11 Strong.

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ANOTHERMICHIGANLOSS's picture

I'd agree on everything but the Grinch/Schiano situation.  Mattison/Hafley is the right combo of guys on their way out to teach and having a young guy coming up to learn.  Should work out well.  But I don't think the issue with Grinch/Schiano was all ego.  I think Grinch was hired under the pretense that it would pretty much be his D since Schiano already had one foot out the door.  Schiano didn't like handing the keys over to a young kid and interfered, one little flare up causes what happened last year.  I think Grinch is going to show he has the mind and talent to be a solid D-coordinator, while Schiano was employed for 2 weeks by NE before backing out.  I think that situation was more Schiano than Grinch....it was the Schiano schemes that everyone complained about last year.  Grinch didn't have a chance to put his mark on the defense.

Either way, it's all how you view it I guess.  One of us could have the right view or we could both be way off base haha.  Either way, it seems that this year is moving in the right direction and I credit Day for hiring the right people that are willing to work together instead of pushing their personal motives onto the program.

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Dstacify's picture

I think Grinch is more to blame for last year and here's why. The biggest problem with the defense was the play of the safeties (which was his position group). Also Schiano managed the defense in 2017 by himself without a co-DC present and the defense was the strength of the team that year (the offense was not great post-Iowa that season, especially through the air). Schiano's not completely blameless for what happened to the defense last season but I think him and Grinch not meshing well together was the real problem (similar to Fickell and Withers not meshing well together in 2013). Now I think had Grinch been granted what had been promised to him and managed the defense by himself they might've been fine. However, you have to keep in mind it was also Grinch's decision to start Jahsen Wint and Isaiah Pryor at the beginning of the year and even if he did manage the defense by himself Bill Davis is still on staff setting back our LB play (which was also a huge problem).

11 Strong.

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va_buck's picture

i blame the suspension.  Urban wasn't there to ensure the Grinch and Sciano worked it out.  And i do agree that Grinch was the change agent responsible for going from good to abysmal.

VA_Buck

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Dstacify's picture

Wasn't Schiano also helping Day out quite a bit with his new head coaching duties during the suspension? Could be Schiano let Grinch have some leeway to run the defense as he saw fit during those three games Meyer was not present for and then once Meyer returned stepped back in to seize control (which Grinch could've possibly viewed as a slap in the face).

11 Strong.

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Nutinpa's picture

Until shown otherwise, and despite my deep respect for Greg Schiano, I put last year's D woes on him -- and Urban Meyer.  Grinch had the keys to the office taken from him.....and I am guessing did not have final say on personnel, let alone, scheme. I might be naive in my thinking, but while I do blame Grinch for taking on what was presumed to be an attitude, I think some or much of it was justified.   

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MaineStrength's picture

You've got me convinced.  I think he's a good coach and recruiter.  I think his results speak for themselves.  He's not perfect, but he's done well everywhere.  But, some of the same folks point things like Gary's lack of production and perceived lack of development and cite Mattison as the cause, then turn around and sing his praises.  I agree that you have to take it in context.  But, good luck telling OSU fans that Gary and Winovich being hurt in last year's game was a reason for the lack of pass rush. 

Strength equipment is expensive & guarantees you nothing. A strong will is free & will give you everything you need.

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Dstacify's picture

I think Gary plays with questionable effort at times (last year in particular he seemed to be playing to preserve himself for the NFL on occasion) but it's kind of hard to blame that on coaching. That's more on the player. If it was a common problem across the entire defensive line you could blame coaching but Winovich played his ass off (as did some of the of the other less heralded guys like Paye and Dwumfour).

11 Strong.

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MaineStrength's picture

The general consensus that I have seen for years for a punchline at Michigan has not been on the defensive side of the ball

This was a comment on another thread this morning

when you add up the last 5 scores that stout "D" OF scU* is giving up an average of 41.4 points in their annual beat down by the Bucks.

Strength equipment is expensive & guarantees you nothing. A strong will is free & will give you everything you need.

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ANOTHERMICHIGANLOSS's picture

16
13
2
6
27

These are the last 5 years final total defense rankings for those UM defenses.  These numbers are skewed quite a bit by one game, the OSU/UM game.  Going into these games their ranking was higher.  You can ignore anyone that bases an entire defensive unit based off of one game.  OSU managed a total of 347 yards of offense against MSU last year, and the game was late in the year.  That one game doesn't define the OSU offense as much as the one game per year OSU has handled the UM defense can't be the focal point.

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MaineStrength's picture

I commend you on your willingness to see the whole picture and provide some give and take in a discussion.  I totally agree and in fact said the same thing.  I think you saying it, coming from a fellow OSU fan, will be received better than when I do. :)

Strength equipment is expensive & guarantees you nothing. A strong will is free & will give you everything you need.

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SleepyLeviathan's picture

Mattison was very solid at Michigan. The issue with their defense wasn't on his shoulders, it's Don Browns aggressive man-coverage scheme being great against teams that they can overwhelm with their DLine/LBs. 

However, as with all aggressive man-coverage schemes, if you can't match up man to man in the secondary, you're going to get torched if your pass rush can't get home and the QB is accurate. Case in point: the 2018 edition of The Game. Our line held up spectacularly, and gave Dwayne and company the chance to identify matchups and simply shred their secondary. 

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Braxtonkeepsit's picture

The skunks are miles away from Sparty in strength and conditioning, and light years away from us .  That, and foot speed are the only flaws in their defense.  

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FalcotoyourMartel's picture

It looks like he stole those gold pants. Or holding them up like they're keys in the 4th quarter. So conflicted.

Pain heals. Chicks dig scars. Glory lasts forever. -Falco

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BrewstersMillions's picture

My biggest irrational fear is that somewhere, someone out there in Buckeye Fandom Land may see the Ohio State defense not perform up to his standards and come out with a sizzling take about Greg and Ron being UM plants.

A fear bigger than that, however, is that I'm not being irrational and "Someone" is actually "Several people",

For the sake of my sanity, I hope the OSU defense is instantly a top-five unit.

Proudly dispensing unbridled arrogance since 1983.

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another-navy-buckeye's picture

I think you may be spot on.

Blessed to be a Buckeye

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NorthCoastBias's picture

Ramzy, it looks like you have the wrong Stillhouse Whiskey website linked in the article. I was taken to a site for some ghastly moonshine-like product sold in a can.

Here's the homepage for the bourbon you were sent - https://www.vanbruntstillhouse.com/

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hetuck's picture

I expect Mattison and Washington to embrace the ceremony and urge their charges "to help us get one of those." And more. After all Josh Perry's mom has four she wants to show Harbaugh. 

Winning is a habit. Unfortunately, so is losing.

Vince Lombardi

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Skunk bear blood's picture

lmao...."Panty melters. You're Welcome"   Always looking for your hidden gems in the hover.
You a wicked funny man Ramzy.  A must follow on the twitter 

OFFS

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IGotAWoody's picture

Go Gray, Beat Scarlet.

F that shit, I'm rooting for Grey...

“The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it.” – Theodore Roosevelt

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Dillon G's picture

I will continue watching Burrow and his Tigers when the time slot does not overlap the great state of Ohio’s representatives in football.

And if Tathan behaves, I might tune in to watch the U. He better hope they are playing Wisky in January.

#walkaway

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Extramedium's picture

Yep, will watch and root for Burrow, and will watch little man Tate as well..but mostly out of pure curiosity.

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IBLEEDSCARLETANDGRAY's picture

I'll watch Tathan only to see Clemson thump his gourd.

"You're the patron saint of the totally effed" - Hot Tub Time Machine

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SpielzWheelz's picture

I abso love every article Ramzy pens up.... this one is a classic

SpielzWheelz

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JFBuckeye64's picture

Am I reaching for meaning in noticing 7-straight letters in each of Ramz's last two article titles? Say how many wins in a row do we have against TTUN?

JFBuckeye64

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joshsummers02's picture

I live in San Diego.  Not sure if its the same place as your friend, but there's a restaurant near my office called Searsucker.  They serve a PB&J old fashion.  I'm not into sweet drinks, but it is really good.  It is Makers bourbon infused with peanuts with a bit of muddled strawberry (the "jelly").  I recommend it.

"It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer."  - Albert Einstein

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Evansvillebuckeye's picture

Anyone else find it ironic that Ryan Day’s Birthday is the day Woody passed away?

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RBurgundy4's picture

After the season, offensive mastermind Rich Rodriguez replaced the retiring Lloyd Carr, and weeks later the freshman felt incompatible with the new regime so he did the unthinkable. It was a complicated time.

No, Sir. Incorrect. It was, in fact, a time of in   de   non  uncomplication.(Fuck it, whater the proper word is). It was JPT uncomplicating the ever-loving shit out of the Rivalry. My God, it was glorious, and remains so to this day. Love that man. 

Thanks, Ramzy. As always, you right good.

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HoosierBuck's picture

Actually Ramzy imho you are # UNO!  I really enjoy your sports articles. Love the sense of humor that is unique to you as a writer.  The Buorbon.. not so much, but that's okay.  Keep it up man!

Go Bucks!

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dwersch11's picture

I like having Mattison....did a good job at TTUN, and their defensive numbers would've been even better last year if we didn't shred them. Go Bucks!

dannywersching

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jbuckeye007's picture

Will Mattison & Washington receive a pair of Gold pants too?

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Trebor40's picture

Mattison and Washington are two excellent recruiters and in Mattison's case has more knowledge of the offenses of the big ten than any save LJ. Given that Mattison is an excellent instructor of fundamentals I believe our soon to be Juniors and down are going to get there first real taste of fundamental defensive instruction! We also will benefit from a fresh pair of eyes on our most questioned position group (though I actually think safety was our worst)!

I would rather be on hand with 10 men then elsewhere with 10,000 - Timur Lenk

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jbuckeye007's picture

It seems being from Ohio is a requirement for being a "Michigan Man"!!!

  • Bo
  • Mo
  • Hoke
  • Harbaugh
  • Howard
  • Woodson
  • Deardorf
  • etc.
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doodah_man's picture

Ramzy, I was fine with the uniform issue but the peanut butter in bourbon was inexcusable. You are essentially what is wrong with...well...everything.

Jim "DooDah" Day

"If I were giving a young man advice as to how he might succeed in life, I would say to him, pick out a good father and mother, and begin life in Ohio.” --Wilbur Wright, 1910

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Klytus21's picture

Wait.  Greg Mattison is not a Panty Dropper?  

NJBuck

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