Phutatorius's picture


Member since 13 May 2011 | Blog

Recent Activity

Comment 18 Nov 2015

Years and years ago I was just out of college and working as a paralegal in New York City.  The law firm's managing partner was your classic stereotype of a terrifying boss.  Huge, bald, cigar-smoking.  Had a hand grenade on his desk for a paperweight that he said was live.  He hunted lions in Africa and signed memos "P.O.D." for "Prince of Darkness."

One day he took us all out to lunch in Midtown to chew us out.  Extreme upscale Italian restaurant with zebra skins on the walls.  After we order, my boss launches into an extended lecture.  About ten minutes into this my eye wanders off him and I see James Hetfield sitting two tables over.  I must have made a face or something, because my boss looks at me and says, "You, what?"

"That's James Hetfield over there."


"He's the lead singer for Metallica."

"I don't know what that is."

"That guy should be gnawing on the haunches of a dead ox or something.  And he's here eating pasta primavera."

Boss looks away from me in disgust and resumes his lecture.

Comment 14 Oct 2015

Hey 11W:

Any hope you all could kill the "17 Horribly Aged Celebrities" link (and more importantly, the photo) that's at the foot of each page?


Comment 03 Oct 2015

A few observations:

(1) QB draws don't play to Cardale's strengths.  He's a bulldozer when he gets moving, but he has to get moving.  On these designed QB runs they're giving him, he's not even in first gear when he hits the line.  It's setting him up to fail.  It's not a surprise to see an LB dump him at the line of scrimmage.  Roll him out, get him a head of steam — or get him scrambling — and look out.

(2) On these obvious running downs — say, when we're up a TD with 6:00 left — they COULD line Braxton up at QB with Zeke in the backfield.  They could read option or run a play with Zeke as lead blocker.  Also, I'm seeing a lot of fakes to the jet sweep, but not any actual jet sweeps.  If you don't have to respect the fake, there's no point.  

(3) (Sort of) Relatedly, Samuel got the ball once.  Once, with Elliott leading him toward the sideline.  That play works and plays to our strengths.  Lately, it seems like if Samuel's gonna get the ball, he has to come across the field and pick off a pass thrown to someone else.  That worked last week; this week not so much.

(4) When was the last time we ran play action?  A screen pass?

They stack the box, we don't even try to go deep.  We run QB draws, and we hope EZE can break through and get behind the cheating defenders.  That's really about it, and thank God he did, three times today.  We don't use play action to set up the pass.  We don't run read option (and to be fair, after the one time we tried, I could see why).  Jet sweeps are off the table.

I feel like the offense is transitioning away from our bread and butter over the last three years.  I'm fine with that.  I'd just like to understand better what we're transitioning to.

Comment 28 Sep 2015

So the penalties were appropriate -- they just didn't call them by the right name.

I can live with that.  Gamble was held in the Fiesta Bowl, after all.

Comment 28 Sep 2015

Maybe that's why I wasn't plugged in to the rule.  I don't watch a lot of football on Sundays ...

Comment 28 Jul 2015

Kid is 23 in AA, behind a 22-year-old Jose Ramirez and a 21-year-old Lindor.  It's not like there's a crying need for shortstops in Cleveland.  It's a salary dump.  Lame.  

Comment 16 Jul 2015

This is a time commitment, but I'll make it.  I love me some TMBG.  (This notwithstanding I got in a Twitter fight with them earlier this year, because I couldn't take my kids to their last Boston show -- who knew they were a 14+ act?)

Comment 15 Jul 2015

Yeah, that's the thing.  The service plan we bought on our refrigerator is a joke.  We have one option for an authorized repairman, he apparently covers the Eastern Seaboard, b/c he's booked through Armageddon, and when he does show up he thinks the temperature readout is an error message code:

"That blinking 7.  That's the error code.  Yeah -- that's it!"  [consults manual]

Wife pushes a button, toggles the temp reading to Fahrenheit, blinking 7 changes to blinking 42.  "Yeah, well, what does error code 42 mean?"

It's laughable.  But TVs are their core product.  I would think they're trying harder to get them right.  Makes it harder to pull the trigger, though.

Comment 15 Jul 2015

Not sure what I like more about your post, BuckeyeSean:

(1) The helpful information and suggestions throughout, or

(2) "most others should by Jan 1, 2016 at the latest... not helpful for most of buckeye season."

Emphasis added, Brother.  Emphasis added.