dumpus's picture


Pittsburgh, PA (via Pittsburgh, PA)

Member since 07 February 2012 | Blog

Helmet Stickers: 1,164 | Leaderboard

Voting Record: 12 / 0

"don't say anything mean about me or crack jokes on what i've experienced in life because i get butthurt easily and it makes me feel sad and unappreciated."
- 99% of 11w commentariat


  • SPORTS MOMENT: Taking home (and still having) a chunk of the field after the 2002 Michigan game
  • NFL TEAM: Pittsburgh Steelers
  • NHL TEAM: Pittsburgh Penguins
  • NBA TEAM: nba sucks
  • MLB TEAM: Detroit Tigers

Recent Activity

Comment 22 Jan 2015

it's like coming home to finding 3 gorgeous naked women lying on your bed.  

your mind starts racing at the possibilities, and only then you cruely realize that you can really only work one of them at a time, maybe two with divided attention and running a heightened risk of the train running off the tracks.

Comment 14 Jan 2015

damn Ramzy, spot on.

I was right there with you in Tempe...about 3-4 rows behind the band staring right down that fateful endzone line.  whole thing happened in slow motion - dorsey's count, cie grant getting shot out of a cannon, dorsey ragdolling in the air, the ball floating in mid-air for what seemed to be forever...

i saw the ball disappear into a crowd of green and white shirts...and then...nothing.  full sensory explosion to the point where sight and sound and smell were just obliterated.  it took what seemed like minutes to regain my place in the world.  i remember my little sister hugging me and picking me off the ground, i remember seeing a brass musical instrument falling back from the atmosphere to which it was cast in triumph, and i remember looking straight up into the air and screaming as loud as i could - and having that scream matched by some equally crazed lunatic hanging over the balcony above.

this year feels different though.  2002 was really a surprise for everyone, and it felt that way all over tempe and phoenix that week.  we were happy to be there, and we hoped our boys would show well knowing in the bottom of our hearts that Miami hadn't ever seen a D like ours.  when we won, it was a relief of pressure.  a wave of joy felt for the first time by a whole generation of buckeyes whose only experience of a national championship was in black and white stories told by our parents.

i think what makes 2014 different, though, is the leadup to the triumph.  i felt before the Wisconsin game the same feelings i felt before that Miami game, in part due to wondering what we were going to do with an unproven qb.  but ever since the end of the first quarter against Wisconsin, it all felt different.

it felt destined, maybe?  it felt the way i felt just before i saw that yellow flag fly into the air to disrupt the fireworks in tempe.

"it just just can't end like that. that's not how this is supposed to go."

in 2002 i felt joy.  in 2014, i feel contentment.  i feel vindication.  i feel peace.  i feel awe at having the privilege of watching this team grow up and develop and ensure unending hardship right before my eyes.

does this year feel better than 2002?  no, it doesn't.  but it does feel different in a very good and satisfying way.  and given the circumstances of this season compared to 2002, i think i can say that it feels like it's supposed to feel.

we won the whole damn thing.

Comment 08 Jan 2015

if memory serves me right, Miami had the same strategy back during the Larry Coker days.  

the 2002 Hurricanes average drive time on their 67 offensive touchdowns was 1:58.  18 of those 67 were scored in less than a minute.  they were a model of offensive effectiveness and efficiency.  

only difference between the 02 U and the 14 Ducks is that the U was damn near as effective and efficient on defense as they were on offense.  we shut down Miami not so much by limiting how many times they scored, but by how often they could score - they only punted 4 times and kicked 3 fgs.

we've shown that we can go toe to toe offensively against any team in the country.  as opposed to 2002 though, instead of our defense having to stand on its head all night, we may only have to make a small handful of defensive stands to win this thing.

Comment 29 Aug 2014

last friday of the offseason.  you know how this gets done.

Comment 27 Aug 2014

lets not all get too mushy over the Rose Bowl - its a great idea and all, reverential even...but in real life, its an antiquated dinosaur.  

it sucks to get to, it sucks to get in to, it sucks to be in, it sucks to get out of, and it sucks to get away from.  

simply being old isn't a mark of quality.  the only appeal it really has is that its not below freezing on new years day.

Comment 01 Jul 2014

on the contrary, good sir.  i like Melt.  as soneone who tips a scale at about 250ish, i like good food as well, and none of that nouveau cuisine "tasting menu" shit (although Jose Andreas' Minibar in DC was awesome).  i just don't like burgers that don't taste like burgers.  Five Guys burgers taste like burger for one bite, but then you get that Exxon Valdez grease slick in your mouth from the 15% lean meat they use, and you're done for.  Five Guys wouldn't even be in my top 5 of fast food burgers; it's looking up at Wendy's for christ's sake.

Comment 30 Jun 2014

we aren't Five Guys.  we aren't overrated pieces of shit between two greasy pieces of bread that fat people flap their rolls at in excitement.

they just opened a Five Guys across the street from my office in downtown Yinzburgh.  i can't wait to see the parade of diabeetus and gout wrapping around the block waiting to get inside.  by 11:00am, i'm betting that its almost gonna resemble the line at the bus stop.  yikes.

drop the Five Guys reference, and replace it with In-N-Out.  go animal style or go home.  

Comment 25 Jun 2014

why does Heuerman's little tantrum drip of "i don't deserve a ticket because i'm a football player" obnoxiousness?  

don't want a ticket?  park somewhere else.  or get a parking pass.  quit being a whiny bitch.  you wanted the Big 10 college experience?  you got it.

Comment 18 Apr 2014

I think that Ohio State is much better equipped than most large fanbases to be on the right side of life.

With all due respect, I'm sure the lovely people of Happy Valley and Steubenville felt the same way.  It's easy to be complacent about the hidden sociopathy that lies dormant in a large fanbase, only to tear forth with a fury when an event occurs that requires fans to choose between their moral/ethical values and their favorite football team.   

Time will tell on our end, of course.  When you mix hormone-crazed young men with an atmosphere of privilege and entitlement, its not a matter of if, but when.  It can happen anywhere, and in time it will happen anywhere.