Skull Session: Buckeyes Wreck Senior Bowl Competition, Miller's NFL Inspiration, and Jenkins Gets His Pro Bowl Bid

It's Wednesday, baby! If you're looking to huff some Buckeye football *opens trench coat* here's ESPNU's Senior Bowl media schedule. The North practices from 1 p.m. to 3 p.m.

 BUCKS DEMOLISH SENIOR BOWL COMPETITION. Tuesday, Braxton Miller dazzled NFL personnel and scouts during the first day of Senior Bowl practice. Yet he wasn't the only Buckeye to put in work for the set.

Joshua Perry, Adolphus Washington, Tyvis Powell, Nick Vannett (and Noah Spence!) all drew praise during their first outing in Mobile, Alabama.

#OhioState TE Nick Vannett lacks much shake to separate but he's impressing by finishing contested catches. Underutilized at OSU.

— Dane Brugler (@dpbrugler) January 26, 2016

Noah Spence is practicing like a volcano ready to explode. It's getting chippy between him and every OL he faces 1-on-1.

— Dane Brugler (@dpbrugler) January 26, 2016

There is yet to be a North offensive linemen to block Adolphus Washington DT Ohio State. Been explosive all day.

— Bryan Broaddus (@BryanBroaddus) January 26, 2016

Defensively, Ohio State OLB Joshua Perry and Temple CB Tavon Young standing out early during North practice.

— Rob Rang (@RobRang) January 26, 2016  

Braxton Miller, Nick Vannett and Josh Perry all doing well.

— Tony Pauline (@TonyPauline) January 26, 2016

Ohio State S Tyvis Powell has impressive size (6-3, 210). Moves well and physical in coverage vs. TEs.

— Mike Jones (@MikeJonesWaPo) January 26, 2016

Who wasn't underutilized last year on offense? Hell, the 2015 Silver Football winner was underutilized at times. This is what happens when you stockpile luxury cars. No matter how rich a person is, they can only drive one car at a time. That means other pearls gather dust in a garage.

What I'm saying is Urban Meyer will never stop buying luxury cars, folks.

And I realize the Senior Bowl isn't NFL competition, but reading about Buckeyes slaying the competition makes me even saltier about the Michigan State game. America was deprived of that Ohio State–Alabama rematch!

 I HAD BRAXTON PEGGED FOR AN EDELMAN EMULATOR. I always enjoy hearing protégés talk about the masters from which they draw inspiration. But it's troubling to hear Braxton Miller dabbling in dark magic.

From NFL.com:

"AB, Antonio Brown, he's the guy (I emulate)," Miller said. "He's got athleticism and explosion. He can play inside and outside, so he brings both to the table."

As a Browns fan the name "Antonio Brown" nauseates me. It's fitting because it's how Miller made opposing fans feel during his four seasons in Columbus. (One day I'll realize the power move is divesting all sporting interests outside of Ohio State fandom.)

"I love getting to go outside (against cornerbacks in single coverage). It's a lot more fun outside. Either you will win or he will win, so it's a chance to show out. Inside, you've got the safety, you've got a rotation guy, the linebacker, on the outside it's one on one. Inside, it's more traffic."

[...]

"I don't like to get covered. I like a lot of separation, so that's the main thing I want to show," Miller said. "And that I can be a dominant receiver, inside or outside, out of the backfield, punt return, whatever they need."

The Cowboy coaching staff—let's join hands and say a quick prayer about Braxton not ending up in Dallas—reportedly coached up Miller during his time as a punt returner, at which he excelled.

Though Ohio State didn't harness him completely, people tend to write off he'd only played the position six months of his career. His growth going forward will be ridiculous.

For example, I don't understand how a move like this is stopped without a handful of jersey:

Seems like he has "Patriots second round pick" written all over him. I only hope his body cooperates. 

 MALCOLM GOING TO HAWAI'I AFTER ALL. Malcolm Jenkins had a career year in 2015, and he was snubbed in Pro Bowl voting in part because his team was trash.

Justice, however, will be rendered though it's via replacing the injured Tyrann Mathieu. 

From philadelphiaeagles.com:

The safety has been officially named to the 2016 Pro Bowl, replacing Arizona's Tyrann Mathieu, who is currently recovering from a torn ACL. The honor is the first of Jenkins’ seven-year career. Jenkins is the fourth Eagle to earn Pro Bowl accolades this season along with defensive end Fletcher Cox, tackle Jason Peters and return specialist Darren Sproles .

In 2015, Jenkins racked up career highs in a number of categories, including tackles (120), tackles for loss (13), passes defensed (15) and forced fumbles (3). He ranked first among all Eagles defenders in total tackles and the safety’s 13 tackles for loss trailed only Cox for the team lead.

These stats allowed him to be graded as the No. 1 safety in the league this season by Pro Football Focus, an honor many, including Eagles Hall of Fame safety Brian Dawkins, feel is well-deserved.

Michigan Man Tom Brady saw his season end in the hands of Bradley Roby. That game would've happened in Boston had Brady and the Patriots handled business at home in Week 17 against the Philadelphia Eagles and their dead-coach-walking.

Here's Jenkins taking an errant third quarter Brady pass 99-yards the other way:

Congrats to @MalcolmJenkins, who is #ProBowl bound. He replaces Arizona's Tyrann Mathieu: https://t.co/ONjws6CWPD pic.twitter.com/48HcxqBKZW

— Philadelphia Eagles (@Eagles) January 26, 2016

This is why Michigan fans celebrate any morsel of good news like an 18-year-old Charles Woodson just walked into Schembechler Shack. Those miserable people have nothing to live for.

 THE SENATOR LIVING THAT GINGERBREAD MAN LIFE. Jim Tressel took time out managing his criminal empire to brag to MMQB about his #teen recruiting skills:

Youngstown, OHIO- Jim Tressel has five former players in #SB50. "Can anyone else say they have that many?" pic.twitter.com/HzdKTL9LAj

— The MMQB (@theMMQB) January 26, 2016

Ohio State should replace postgame "Carmen Ohio" with a narcocorrido about Jim Tressel.

 WELCOME TO OHIO! OUR CURRENCY IS WHISKEY. Alcohol is poison, and Ohio, a liquor control state, can't sell enough of it. The state shattered its liquor sales record in 2014 and did so again in 2015.

We're all about dark liquor too.

From our nation's site of record, marionstar.com:

Sales of spirituous liquor last year totaled more than $1 billion ($1,018,126,447, to be exact), the Ohio Department of Commerce's Division of Liquor Control reported Tuesday. That's an increase of 7.3 percent, $70 million more in sales than in 2014.

The 2015 total breaks down to $731 million in retail dollar sales, an increase of eight percent, and $287.1 million in wholesale dollar sales (liquor bought by retail permit holders such as restaurants, bars and clubs), an increase of 5.5 percent.

Those numbers didn't just result from increased drinking: Dollar sales grew at a higher rate than alcohol consumption. The 466 contract liquor agencies in Ohio sold 13 million gallons of liquor in 2015, an increase of 3.9 percent over 2014.

Does anybody know how many DUIs come with 13 million gallons of liquor? Because I can't legally operate a car after pondering 13 million gallons of liquor.

As for the #brands: Fireball is up to No. 2, but Jack Daniels is still the kingpin.

I'm disappointed Hennessy isn't higher. We may need to schedule an intervention if this isn't rectified in 2016.

 THOSE WMDs. 100-year-old woman wakes up to a kinkajou on her chest... Michigan Man watched porn before fatal car crash... Teeny-tiny sketch... 25 hard truths about writing and publishing... William Safire orders two Whoppers Junior... The living dead.