Tuesday Skull Session

By D.J. Byrnes on April 7, 2015 at 4:59 am
Jeff Greene, not J.T. Barrett
132 Comments

The perils of not taking your education seriously: I got owned by an 80-year-old Xavier grad yesterday:

HAVE YOU EVER RAN A 40... ON DRUGS?

Have ran ? C'mon guys, haven't you ever heard of the "perfect" tense? . How 
about "Have you ever run a 40... on drugs?" I learned this in grade school 
over 70 years ago. 

Another common error is the use of "have went". Try have, has or had "gone" 
instead. My iMac even knows that "went" is wrong. 

Also tell DJ that this is from a Xavier graduate. 8^)

You can almost taste his satisfaction in the 8^), lmao. 

But actually, this was the first I heard of this alleged "perfect tense." Had I known, I would've deployed it; it's perfect, after all. I guess it's a good thing my pay check isn't earned on grammar, because I'd be back to being a street urchin.

How does a man roughly 52 years my senior remember grade school better than me? I'll leave the reader to speculate on that, but I re-read the original line like 10 times out loud, and no ignorance sirens were blaring in my mind. It still doesn't ring any, to be honest. (My high school diploma is an indictment of the Ohio public education system.)

Don't end up owned on the internet, kids. Grammar is cool and good.

BIG STICK ERICK SMITH. The more I read about Erick Smith, the more I like him. If Ohio State fielded 85 Glenville alumni, I'd be *100 emoji* with it.

From Scout.com:

“Coach Ginn always used to preach to us that there’s no substitution for helmet and shoulder pads,” Smith said. “Everything else is going to come. You have to have the heart to actually hit. That’s just what Coach Ginn preaches, just have the heart to be a violent football player.”

Ginn’s latest big hitter has that heart, and didn’t have a problem showing it last fall as a true freshman. Playing on special teams and getting some snaps as a backup safety, Smith finished his first season in Columbus with 13 tackles, an interception and a fumble recovery. He expects even bigger things in his second season, and his teammates tend to agree. Junior safety Tyvis Powell was particularly effusive in his praise of his backup.

“Erick’s the man,” Powell said. “I tell you what, if I ever break a shoestring, ain’t nobody going to blink an eye. Everybody’s going to be like, ‘You know what? We’re good.’”

I would never wish harm on a man as silky as Tyvis Powell, but I am excited for Erick Smith's impending ascension. If Nick Saban and Bert Bielema can whine about the hurry-up offense, then at some point Urban may want to broach the fact he's only allowed to play 11 players at a time. An unjust rule is no rule at all.

ZACH SMITH SHINE. Urban Meyer is a young guy with a young staff, but only one staff member is under 40 years old.

From ESPN.com's Top Big Ten assistants under 40 piece, which ranks Zach Smith at No. 7:

Ohio State wide receivers coach Zach Smith: Hired by the Buckeyes in late 2011 at the tender age of 27, Smith is another guy with good bloodlines: His great grandfather is former Ohio State coach Earle Bruce. Smith has made his own name while working with the Buckeyes receivers, who made tremendous strides in 2014 on the way to the national title. He's also very active on Twitter, where he's ready to hand out accolades to his players.

Chris Ash and Luke Fickell are 41 years old, for the record.

Wisconsin's 38-year-old DC, Dave Aranda, who elected to stay in Madison with Paul Chryst instead of heading to Oregon State with Gary Andersen, leads the list. Michigan's Wario D.J., D.J. Durkin, despite only coaching a spring game in the Big Ten, comes in at No. 2.

LIFE ADVICE FROM IRONDALE. It will be a sad, sad day when Cardale Jones hangs up his sawed-off 12-gauge shotgun, but the silver lining will be he can enter the media and start dropping uncensored takes.

I hope this becomes a weekly thing from Dolodale. Like FDR's fireside chats, but more pertinent, helpful and memorable.

TOM RYAN HONORED. Ohio State won its first wrestling team national title in its 94-year history this past season, and to the victors go the spoils.

From Mark Palmer of InterMat.com:

Tom Ryan, who took his Ohio State wrestlers to their first Big Ten conference crown in more than six decades, and their first-ever NCAA team title with two individual champs, has been named 2015 InterMat Coach of the Year, the amateur wrestling website announced on Monday morning. 

Presented each year since 2006 to the best college coach in all divisions, the award is based solely on the balloting of writers and executives at InterMat. Each staff member is asked to select five coaches and rank them from first to fifth. Point values are assigned to each placement, ranging from one point for a coach listed fifth on a voter's ballot, up to nine points for a first-place choice.

[...]

"If there is one word that characterizes Tom Ryan in regards to the Ohio State wrestling teams' run at the NCAA title, it would have to be 'belief,'" said InterMat staff writer Tom Franck. "The mastermind of the Buckeye program had been publicly vocal for the past two years that he believed with every fiber of his being that his team could win the national championship in 2015. Making that a reality was in no small part due to Coach Ryan's ability to sell that belief to all around him. 

I don't know a thing about wrestling (other than, you know, Logan Stieber can't be beat), but it's impossible not to feel good about Tom Ryan (via Doug Lesmerises of cleveland.com's article on the footballcation of the wrestling program):

"Everybody knows that follows the sport, particularly in Ohio, how good this state is," Ryan told Northeast Ohio Media Group after that celebration last weekend. "The state's amazing, the institution's amazing. Let's marry them.

"Why would Ohio State wrestling not be a team, like our football team, that every year fans and supporters wake up, and they're on their way to work, and they're thinking, 'Our wrestling team has a shot?' 

"And that's where we are now. We're here to stay. Every year we'll have a shot. Are you going to bring home (a trophy?) No guarantee. But we'll be in the hunt."

In other breaking news: The Buckeyes are extremely good. We'll have more on this after the hour.

NEW FAVORITE BUCKEYE?! As many of you know, the Iron King, Cardale Jones, First of His Name, Poacher of Badgers, Controller of Tides, Slayer of Ducks, Troll Sultan, and 12th Son of Ohio, is my favorite Buckeye of all time, but Sandusky's Aaron Mawhirter is closing the gap:

The Midway Masseuse is an hilariously creepy nickname. (Tangent: R.I.P. forever to Bento Go Go, though.)

AUTISM SPEAKS. Here's a cause worthy of your time and/or money, which was shared by Josh Perry's dad:

Autism Speaks U at The Ohio State University presents the first annual charity reception Autism Speaks; The Buckeyes are Listening!! Proceeds from this event will not only benefit our organization but also Nisonger Center, in support of building a playground for children with intellectual and developmental disabilities; including autism. For more information visit www.nisonger.osu.edu

Not that you need an incentive to do some good works, but it's an event that will be held at the Woody Hayes Center Ohio Stadium, which I thought was a nice touch:

The Ohio Stadium Recruit Room
411 Woody Hayes Drive 
Columbus, Ohio 43210

Saturday, April 11, 2015 from 7:00 PM to 10:00 PM (EDT)

[Insert TheMoreYouKnow.GIF here, and yes, it's pronounced like the peanut butter. Sorry losers.]

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