I know this is beating a dead horse, and if there was a forum for Mark May topics only, I would have definitely posted it in that forum, but there isn't. I was just listening to College Football Live, and one of the questions was: Who wins the OSU-Wisky game? And Mark says: Wisconsin will win this game eeeeasily, they'll rush easy for 300 yards over the Buckeye defense. Of course, Rece Davis basically calls Mark crazy and says that Brax will be too much for Wisky to handle. I might get some crap for posting another forum about Mark, but I felt like this had to be heard by Buckeye fans.






Mark May has a tiny brain and dung breath.
Mark May makes me hate.
Mark May's act will go the way of Trev Alberts before too long. You can only sustain a career for so long when you lose all credibility by providing commentary based on nothing but ill feelings toward a school/fan base. That act gets old after a while ... To ALL intelligent fans regardless of who they root for.
I wonder if his ass pain comes from not being recruited/playing at OSU. Yes I know the 72-0 thing, but this goes deeper! Anyone out there have details? His biased opinion is beyond any I have ever heard!
Mark May picks the underdog in pretty much every game that doesn't involve the SEC just to be a contrarian. Last time I looked he was about .500 on his picks for the year--not to be taken seriously. Anyone here could pick around .500 if they even watch CF casually.
He also picked Penn State and Nebraska to beat us haha, so let's hope his brilliance continues.
Hey everybody, do you know what time it is???
"Mark May became much less of a toolbag ever since he started sporting those Randy Jackson glasses."
- absolutely nobody ever
"You win with people." - Woody Hayes
ROFL! May's choking on something, hmmm what could it be?... awesome gif bucksfan
All the games of the season are just practices for that glorious saturday in November when we get to jack Shoelace's invisible cereal bowl and drink our fill of delicious skunkweasel tears ...Michigan Still Sucks!!
Mark Mat is still mad his Pitt team got beat by
osu. In a bowl game. On Along pass near the end of the game.
Mark May will continue to act the way he does as long as it gets people to watch. Its a proven formula for sports broadcasting. Lets just enjoy watching Brax and co. make him look silly every week.
I was out for dinner last night with the wife and I could see them picking on the big screen. I said to my wife the moron on the right will pick Wisconsin and then take a shot at Ohio State...right on cue.
Mark May watches the Sex and The City marathon on TBS.
Who is Mark May? Never heard of him...
FAT URKEL
Im Mark May and Im a fat waste of life.
"if irony were made of strawberries, we' d all be drinking a lot of smoothies right now."
Mark May? The dumb guy with glasses on ESPN? The guy who intentionally pisses off the largest fan base in CFB so that people stay tuned to hear what he says next so that advertisers see huge ratings? The guy with no genuine credibility in sports broadcasting? I've heard of him - Wears ladies undergarments I believe...
I'm seriously no longer bothered by him anymore as he's a paid clown & I accept that he makes his living by being said clown & stirring up poop. I used to get angry with him especially during tat-gate, but hey, UFM is the coach now, OSU's undefeated & things are looking up...The world needs it's clowns.
The world is full of kings & queens who'll blind your eyes & steal your dreams - it's heaven & hell - Ronnie James Dio.
Braxton2Devin said Rece Davis picked the Buckeyes, but I'm quite certain it was actually Brian Griese who picked the Buckeyes saying Wisky wouldn't have an answer for Braxton.
@Kareem, How did they fit 2 huge douches on the same screen?! Pics are classic fellas!
No comments on Holtz, yet? How can you guys stand him any more than May?
Those who stay will be CHAMPIONS!
~Bo Schembechler
Holtz is much better than May who is "King Tool"
Let me see if i understand his logic...
Wisconsin beat powerhouse Northern Iowa by 5 at HOME
Beat powerhouse Utah State by 2 at HOME
Beat powerhouse UTEP by 11 at HOME
Lost to Michigan State by 3 in OT AT HOME
Lost to Oregon State by 3 AT HOME
Lost to Nebraska by 3 on the road
Yet the Badgers going to "eeeasily" beat Ohio State and rush for 300 yards easy on the Ohio State defense?
I sure hope Coach Meyer and his assistants let the defense hear that snippet.
"Sherman ran an option play right through the south" - Greatest.Civil.War.Analogy.Ever
Lou Holtz brought us an NC, a 50-14 stomping of UofM and a Rose Bowl win over OJ Simpson and USC. Never forget.
“Any time you give a man something he doesn't earn, you cheapen him. Our kids earn what they get, and that includes respect.” - Woody
@HAIL
Holtz love for ND is annoying, but his love for tOSU makes up for it. He's usually fair when it comes to the Buckeyes.
"YOLO" = I'm about to do something extremely ignorant/stupid & I need an excuse to do it.
Plus, Holtz wasn't on the halftime show last night which is what led to this thread.
Holtz is a blind-faced, unintelligable ND homer, while May is a contrarian moron who trolls Ohio State to feed the 80% of college football that hates us. When they're together on screen it's like running naked through an ice storm with jagged glass shards underfoot.
Haters gonna hate...just because your team is terrible year in and year out doesn't mean you can run Ohio state down...oh and by the way, you may wanna change your shirt.. It looks like someone took a $h!t in it..
If I could understand what Holtz is saying then maybe I'd have a reason to hate him too, but I just think he's a small, silly, harmless old man. Love when he laughs his ass off at basically nothing all the time.
Whenever I hear Mark May, I think of this:
/Duff'd It
Mark May never checks his check engine light.
Mark May prefers Miracle Whip.
Mark May is on Team Jacob.
Mark May likes Gigli.
Mark May mixes Pappy Van Winkle with Diet Coke.
Mark May (shockingly) thinks Turkey Bacon is good.
I can go all day fellas.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May did not kill 5 hookers but he knows where they were buried. #RIP5HOOKERS #FIRECRAIGJAMESAGAIN
/Duff'd It
Mark May says "guestimate"
Mark May wears socks and sandals.
Mark May is an Indian Giver.
Mark May likes Honey Boo Boo.
Mark May thinks irregardless is a word and 'could care less' about things he hates.
Mark May bought a Pontiac Aztek.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Keep 'em coming, Brewster. LOL
Mark May makes videos of himself blocking empty space in the Idaho desert.
Mark May read the entire "Fifty Shades" series.
Mark May religiously watches "The Notebook"
/Duff'd It
Mark May plays D&D.
Mark May's favorite TV show is "Big, Rich Texas"
Mark May can't read.
Mark May has a poor credit score.
Mark May likes Skip Bayless.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May is over at Napoleons' eating all of his steak.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May shot J.R.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May is a Belieber.
/Duff'd It
Mark May votes for Duke each year in the CFB top 25.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May still says "Wazzzzuuuuppppp"
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May loves Air Supply.
Mark May eats cat food, and he likes it.
Mark May still sleeps with a blankie.
Mark May's idea of a workout is working his way through All-You-Can Eat pancakes at IHOP.
If stupidity were gold, Mark May would be Fort Knox.
Having Herpes > Mark May
The smell of rotting chicken > Mark May
Low back pain > Mark May
Finding out she wasn't on birth control > Mark May
Hard drive crashing > Mark May
Flunking your final > Mark May
Mark May drinks Appletinis.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May listens to One Direction
Mark May's favorite Nickelodeon show is Naked Brothers Band
/Duff'd It
Mark May didn't cry at the end of Field of Dreams.
Mark May thinks Quentin Tarentino is seminally overrated.
Mark May believes Michael Bay is the best director in Hollywood.
Lest we not forget, "Mark May wears women's underwear."
Mark May is always wrong, even when he's right.
/Duff'd It
Guys, Guys. Remember the days when Trev Alberts was on GameDay, and we actually thought Mark May was the reasonable one? LMAO. Good times, great oldies.
Mark May is a noted Segway enthusiast.
Mark May hates "The Replacements", "Major League", and "Miracle" due to them involving either
A. Former Ohio State players
B. Ohio sports teams
/Duff'd It
When Frankie says Relax, Mark May doesn't listen.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May owns a boat and refers to himself as "The Captain".
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
@BREWSTER - See, I've always imagined him dressing in drag on that boat, and christening himself "Tennille".
Eh, though weird, that's just not douchey enough. Guys who give themselves military rank nicknames without having served in the military give me ulcers. I'm going for a whole "Things D-bags do" motif.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
I was thinking that, as well. Mark May idolizes Lane Kiffin.
Mark May crocheted a pair of shorts.
Mark May's mother was a hamster...
And his father smells of elderberries.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May had his sense of humor removed at birth.
Perhaps we should taunt him a second time?
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
Fetchez la vache!
RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
Apropos of this weeks opponent: "Perhaps if we built a large wooden badger..."
his favorite color is blue.....no red! aaaaaahhhhhh!
Mark May is infatuated with Carl Winslow Jr. so much, that he now dresses like Steve Urkel at all times and every time he goes poo in his pants he says, "Did I do that??"
-The Aristocrats!
So let me get this straight. On one thread we are singing Queen and on this thread we are replaying Monty Python. Lord only knows what will happen next.
Mark May always downvotes.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
That's an automatic upvote!
@Oyster - That would depend on whether the thread topic was carried by an African or European swallow.
;-)
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
Mark May loves jersy shore
@ Oyster, it's Friday afternoon, just lie back, relax, and let the 70's wash over you.
Mark May doesn't expect the Spanish Inquisition.
Oh, I'm thoroughly enjoying this. From imaginging you singing Queen and remembering the recreational drugs I indulged in during my youth while watching Monty Python, if I try real hard, I might just be able to induce a flashback!
Dogs growl at Mark May.
Mark May spills red koolaid on your Persian rug.
Mark May eats the last Pudding Pop.
I'd like to use something other than a comfy chair on Mark May.
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
Mark May parks in handicap and expecting mother parking spaces.
I still have no idea who this Mark May person is that you all speak so fondly of, I just thought I would join in so I would be accepted.
Mark May is a face painter.
-The Aristocrats!
9/21/1996-- tOSU-72 MarkMay-0
theDuke
"Assume the position . . ."
"Thank you, sir, May I have another?"
... and i believe BucksFan might have locked up GIF of the Year award for this thread. Congratulations! lmao
theDuke
Fido, that is profoundly disturbing (and by "disturbing", I really mean, "Meriting profuse upvoting"). Besides, Mark May is totally Needermeyer.
i, for one, love these threads. Can we start a new "reason's Mark May Still sucks at____(fill in blank)" thread, like, every Thursday before the games begin? I mean, they say you can't polish a turd, but this shit is gold!
theDuke
Mark May likes mimes.
Mark May eats the last piece of pizza.
Mark May likes showtunes.
"It's just another case of there you are". ~ Doc (1918-2012)
Mark May killed Laura Palmer
-The Aristocrats!
Mark Mays favorite restaraunt is Applebees.
Mark May wears elastic waisted jeans
"I'll fire when I'm god damn good and ready! You got that?" - Pete "Maverick" Mitchel
Hodge, I don't know, Mark May might be better cast as "Babs" Jansen. Who has that picture of Mark May wearing ladies underwear?
RBuck: I didn't know how much I hated Mark May until I read your comment at 2:42 pm above. Worst case scenario . . . you're wife drags you to see a Hello, Dolly off-Broadway production, but let's you bring a Personal Pan Pizza into the theatre. Low and behold, Mark May, dressed as mime, steals your last slice!
Mark May attends An Evening at La Cage once a week.
"It's just another case of there you are". ~ Doc (1918-2012)
Mark May enjoyed Walrusball
Mark May likes Jim Bellushi
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Some of these have me questioning my life. I too enjoy a few things Mark May alledgedly enjoys. What kind of person am I?!!
“Any time you give a man something he doesn't earn, you cheapen him. Our kids earn what they get, and that includes respect.” - Woody
@BUCKSFANXC - It's okay, I've seen Wicked three times, along with Jersey Boys and Dreamgirls. I admit this without shame.
Mark May invented pajama jeans.
Mark May is an extreme couponer.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May believes he is a millionaire because he is helping a Nigerian prince move his fortune to America.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Hodge and Bucksfanxc: it's fine to admit that you like musicals and/or showtunes here in the virtual 11W tailgate - that's one of the awesome things about 11W.
But it's not okay to admit such things at a real world Buckeye tailgate, like ETB. Sorry, it's a man law. I don't make the rules.
When you're happily flipping back-and-forth between four college football games at once, but you discover that all four games have commercial breaks at the same time . . . it's Mark May's fault.
"Mark May plays D&D."
WHOA. You take that back right now.
Don't you dare sully my childhood memories.
And if he had played the bitch would have been that one guy who HAD to play as a lawful evil thief.
I roll twenties. (Thumbs pointed at myself).
Mark May is still waiting for someone to teach him how to dougie.
BedheadJC, you should notice I referred to it as its shortened name which, though not a science, is an indication that the person who says it short hand knows enough about it...as if the guy who made that joke played it himself when he was younger....
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May hates:
John Wayne
Charles Bronson
Clint Eastwood
Chuck Norris
"It's just another case of there you are". ~ Doc (1918-2012)
Wow didn't think I'd get this many replies lol
Mark May pops his collar
We should strive to keep thy name, of fair repute and spotless fame...
(Also, I'm not a dude)
You still mad Fat Urkel?!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JspshPna-bs&feature=youtube_gdata_player
"It's just another case of there you are". ~ Doc (1918-2012)
Vs.
This thread is a clear example on why Mark May still has a job. 100+ comments in less than a day
In this case all press is good press for ESPN
Mark May signs autographs at the soup kitchen.
Mark May makes change in the offering plate.
4-6 seconds from point A to point B and when you get to point B, be pissed off
Mark May is a cotton headed ninny muggins.
Mark May went to the Breaking Dawn 2 midnight showing
~Because we couldn't go for three~
Mark May is secretly a West Virginia grad and a lifetime Dallas Cowboys fan, but don't tell Pitt or the Redskins.
/Duff'd It
Mark May thinks Disney buying Star Wars is a good idea.
~Because we couldn't go for three~
Mark May has multiple Nickelback posters in his apartment
Mark May doesn't always wear women's underwear, but when he does, he (hopefully) puts a Snugglie on over them.
WB
Mark May hates America.
Brewster-- Understood, given your screen name and the 80's childhood you must then have had (?). I was being just as facetious as Mr. May himself.
But not about the rolling twenties part. Half-Elf Rangers for the win.
I would rather just not ever have to hear his name again. PPUHLEEEEEESE STOOOOOOOOOP
You had me at Mark May eats the last pudding pop! Lets take the bastard outback and beat the shit out of him!!!!
Mark May said Braxton wasn't a top 15 player in the country. As Doc Holiday said," Now I really hate him!"
A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men