I saw this today and am trying to wrestle with its veracity and intentions:
I've always taken NCAA Tournament seedings with some levity. There are so many factors at play - including manufactured television ones - that I can accept how and where the teams land (except 2011, when Gene Smith running the tournament apparently thought well we're in the throes of Tatgate; perhaps I'll give Thad's best team the hardest possible road to the Final Four lol)
But this is different. As I examined the Chicken Tender seedings my emotions shifted from indifferent to angry to bewildered. Is this a con? How did reasonable carnivores and starch/fry oil enthusiasts land on these seedings? Namely:
- How is Burger King even in this. Did it win a conference tournament? And why doesn't it have a postseason ban for amatuerism violations?
- McDonald's aka America's Restroom on Roadtrips, is somehow a 4-seed
- 32-seed Long John Silver's doesn't even have chicken tenders. It has chicken planks. And they are sublime. <-- read this with a pirate accent
- Fat Patty's has four locations and they're all in West Virginia. And it's not a chicken place. Why.
- Who the fuck put Chick-fil-A and Popeyes in the same bracket?
- Also, what happens if Chick-fil-A gets the Friday/Sunday draw? Forfeit?
- Rax not only exists in 2017, it's a 6-seed and apparently it has Elite Eight chicken strips.
- ...and Rax is in the same bracket with Arby's, aka "Exactly Like Rax But It Actually Exists in 2017."
- Tyson is in the tournament. You're bringing microwavable frozen tenders to the big dance? GTFO
I'll stop there. I don't know what to make of this, but I'm going to comfort myself by saying it's a Chicken Tender Tournament Bracket designed by someone who only casually eats chicken tenders. This kind of process is better left to the experts.
