Stranger Things Have Happened, ...

onetwentyeight's picture
July 8, 2012 at 3:31p
14 Comments

This blog post is the result of some feverish ideas that randomly struck me today whilst trolling on Twitter (our finest national pastime). I am NOT saying this will happen, or that I even want it to happen, but just that it has a higher likelihood of happening than anybody is willing to admit. The chain of causation is long and there is a small chance every single one of these events happen in this way, but if you look at each individually (as I will), every single event is reasonably likely to occur on its own. So, here we go then:

EVENT 1. Urban Meyer remains the coach at OSU for ~10 plus years, is extremely successful.
Let's face it, isn't this what we all want to happen anyways? We really don't want him to only stay for the duration of his first contract. We want him to become this next Woody Hayes, icon of the University type of leader. Which is great, seeing as that's increasingly rare these day. And the marriage of a highly competitive, successful coach with a well-financed, premier program like ours has the greatest percentage chance of this scenario occurring. So, not far-fetched at all.

EVENT 2. Tim Tebow has a very short NFL career (< ~5 more years left).
With his bruising style of play, the number of hits he's already taken, and the obvious lack of progress as a pocket QB, it's not hard to predict that Tebow's NFL career will not last very long, whether due to catastrophic injury or just the plain old wear and tear his body is taking.

EVENT 3. Tebow retires, but wants to stay in football.
For all the talk of his vast array of activities outside football, we've also all been bombarded with stories of his "legendary competitiveness" and how he loves footbawl so much and wants to win MORE THAN ANYBODY. Okay, great stuff and all, but what I don't get is why people, when they discuss his post-playing career, automatically assume he's just going to become a pastor or missionary or some other wonderful, low-key charity type of dude. Yes, he seems to genuinely care about these causes, but the guy also seems to me like someone who cannot walk away from the game, especially if it's what gave him his "public platform" to begin with. This, in conjunction with all the media reports fawning about what an AWESOME locker room teammate he is, means that I don't believe its far-fetched he will eventually go into coaching after his playing days are done. It gives him a way to impact people while still staying in the public eye, is more glamorous than his other options, and keeps him connected to the game and competition he does seem to really love.

THUS, YOU CAN PROBABLY SEE WHERE I AM GOING WITH THIS:


EVENT 4: Urban Meyer hires Tim Tebow as an OSU Assistant Coach in the year 2018. After all, we know how Meyer keeps in close contact with all his notable former players, how he keeps a relatively tight inner circle, and how he has already hired previous QBs of his in the past to be coaches later on in their career. SO ...


Abomination? Perhaps. But more likely to happen than any of us are willing to admit.

Comments

buck-I.8's picture

Or you could walk outside right now, get a splinter, get gangrene in your wound, and die. But let's be honest, neither of those series of events will happen.

tennbuckeye19's picture

Uh, no. Never say never, but...

ziplock007's picture

I believe you 100%, I'm sold.  What single stock should I use for my 401k?
btw - How come you've never won the lottery?

ziplock007's picture

Nostradamus predicted the world would end in 1732 and, somehow again in, July of 1999.  What's the real year?  Don't keep me in suspense...

M Man's picture

There could be a meteor, called by its astronomical name, "Tebow2008CapOneUM-41UF-37"; and that meteor could slam into Columbus before we even get to 2018.  This thought has been keeping me up at night, so that I had to put up new tinfoil over the windows.
 

Poison nuts's picture

This is funny. Let's say it went down like you said & dude wants to coach. He'd prefer the Gators anyway I would think. I think players are loyal to the school more so than the coach... Sorry for the parade pissing. 

"Death created time to grow the things that it would kill" - Detective Rustin Cohle.

NC_Buckeye's picture

Dude. Seriously. What's with the Tebow love affair?
I know Meyer thinks of him as a second son and all. But this is Ohio State man. Not Florida. I don't want him or his proselytizing anywhere near our program.
Furthermore, what makes you think he would be a good coach in the first place. He would totally suck as a QB coach or any other offensive coach. He couldn't throw worth a turd at Florida. He mostly excelled on running instinct and handing off or short passes to Harvin. Maybe, he was good at running Meyer's system. That doesn't make him a good coach though. And by all accounts he was nowhere near the team leader that the media made him out to be.
Tebow at tOSU would be a colossal failure. And as a member of the Buckeye community I and many others would be very vocal in complaining about this as a personnel decision.
 

Poison nuts's picture

The great thing is it'll not be happening...
While I don't particularly dislike Tebow - I would agree this is OSU & I don't quite understand the love affair for former Gators. Weird. 

"Death created time to grow the things that it would kill" - Detective Rustin Cohle.

sarasotabcg's picture

I'm a huge Tebow fan but I'd rather see Troy Smith coaching our QB's someday.

M Man's picture

We saw enough of Troy Smith.  Is it too late to change my mind and say that I really like the Tebow idea?

Denny's picture

M Man is so the best sometimes.

Taquitos.

Poison nuts's picture

Word.

"Death created time to grow the things that it would kill" - Detective Rustin Cohle.

BuckeyeVet's picture

@M Man - You're welcome to switch allegiances any day. Would love to have you come over to the "light/dark side" any day.

"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read."          - Groucho Marx

 

schooey's picture

Please don't plague us with Tebow.