The Blanket?...My Dog ate it

ChillitownBuck30's picture
September 5, 2013 at 6:27a

Hello to everyone here at Eleven Warriors.  First, I would like to say that this site is aweso_e!  I could go on but I digress.  Second, this is _y first blog post and I hu_bly accept any tips and or criticis_s.  Third, I _ay not be able to portray this hu_orous story in quite the way our fellow writer Ra_zy could, but I will do _y best to at least leave you with a expletive eating grin. 


_y best friend Justin and I have known one another since we were 5.  We went to the sa_e school, sa_e church, and had so_e unforgettable ti_es together.  Whether it was _aking tents with sleeping blankets or playing basketball as _ichael Jordan and Scottie Pippen (I was always Jordan of course) we were inseparable.  As we grew older college football became _ore relevant in our lives.  _e, the fan of the great Ohio State Buckeyes.  He, the fan of the evil tea_ up north.  Every year for about 10 years his fa_ily and _ine had the annual cookout for The Ga_e.  For the longest ti_e I never understood why he would be the fan of such a tea_.  I later assu_ed it is because his father was.  It is unfortunate, but so_ething I came to grips with after a few years of therapy during the John Cooper era.  

A year after graduating high school we both joined the United States Air Force.  I was off to Nevada and hi_ to New Jersey.  We stay in contact as _uch as possible.  When college football starts well, it all depends on how our team did that weekend.  God forbid one of us call the other if our tea_ lost.  Fro_ 2006-2007 I was based in South Korea.  All was well until the BCSCG.  I will not go into details, but we both were able to get so_e intense s_ack talk in that year.  

If you are fa_iliar with South Korea (_ilitary or veteran) then you know they have blankets that you can have custo_ _ade.  These blankets are quite the bargain too.  For so_e reason I decided to oblige _y best friend, and yet hated rival, by buying hi_ a custo_ _ade TTUN blanket.  I told hi_ that I would ship it to hi_ when I ca_e back to the states.  Well, as ti_e passed I had realized I never shipped hi_ the blanket.  Coincidentally, he had never asked for it either.  By this ti_e we were both _arried with kids and a fa_ily dog.  I had just bought a new doghouse and needed a blanket for her (Sienna) to sleep on.  Well, wouldn't you know it I came across the TTUN blanket in the garage.  Sienna see_ed to like it, in part to _y dis_ay, but she was co_fortable. The next day I got a call fro_ Justin.  "Hey _an, I was just wondering if you still had that TTUN blanket you got for _e fro_ Korea.  I co_pletely forgot about it!"  I proceeded to tell hi_ that my dog was using it as a bed.  In a barrage of words i will not soon repeat he expressed to _e his anger.  He finally cal_ed down and I told hi_ I would wash it and send it to hi_.  It was after all, in it's own way, infecting _y poor Sienna and probably giving her bad drea_s of wolverines chasing her about.  In this instance I was doing everyone a favor.  The next _orning I awoke to take Sienna outside.  She rushed out of her doghouse like normal ready to play.  But so_ething was different about her that _orning and I couldn't put _y finger on it.  Later that day I was about to put Sienna back into her doghouse when I noticed so_ething odd yet pleasant.  The TTUN logo, which was quite large i _ight add, was gone.  It was ripped off and nowhere to be found.  It was then I realized what had happened.  Sienna had eaten it.  She was known for eating pretty _uch anything she could get her jaws on, but this was shocking even to _e.  It was confir_ed through the vet. A few days later Justin called _e again asking about the blanket.  Naturally I boasted about the fact that _y dog had eaten the logo and left a big gaping whole in the _iddle of it.  "I don't believe you!", he said.  I tried frivolously to explain it to hi_, but it was no use.  To this day he believes I had never bought the blanket at all.  "The dog ate it huh?", he always says.  No, the dog devoured the enemy and $hit the_ out!  Go Buckeyes!!!  O-H!!!

_eechigan Still SUCKS!!!

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Doc's picture

The next time your dog takes a michigan make sure you wipe its ann arbor.

CJDPHoS Member

The Official DDS of 11W

pjtobin's picture

Very neat story. As the saying goes, your dog is your real best friend. 

Bury me in my away jersey, with my buckeye blanket. A diehard who died young. Rip dad. 

ToledoBuckeye's picture

I have my Korean "Mink" blanket that I picked up in Pusan, South Korea during a port visit in 2004.  It is setting on my couch where the OSU logo is proudly displayed!  I think I paid 15 bucks for that awesome blanket! 

"Anything easy ain't worth a damn." - Woody Hayes

Earle's picture

You can also get a pretty sweet pinstripe suit:

Have you tried Not Your Father's Root Beer?  It tastes just like the real thing, but it packs a punch (5.9%ABV).  It's a little sweet for me though.  Two is my limit.

ChillitownBuck30's picture

Haha...totally forgot about the suits.  Yeah, there were some good deals out there I didn't take advantage of.  I was too busy drinking in A-Town.

“Show class, have pride, and display character. If you do, winning takes care of itself.”

CharlieBuckeye's picture

Great story.  I only wish you had mailed him the blanket to show him the missing M or the aftermath of your wonderful and loyal dog taking a _Ichigan.

"To have a great life simply follow this rule:  Do not bring undo conflict into your life..."

Charlie Baker - OSU - 1986

Phillips.449's picture

Is it legal to mail a Ziplock baggie with a doggie crap inside?  Thank you for your service and for the story!

GO Bucks and GO Sienna!

HighBallAce's picture

I had actually had my 5th grade report card eaten by my dog one time! My dog was teething and somehow got ahold of it. I remember I had the meanest teacher that year and we were supposed to have our report cards signed by our folks and turned in. Well obviously I couldn't turn mine in cause of my dog. So about 2 weeks passes by and I still hadn't had mine turned in so I had to stay in detention and wasn't allowed our to play on recess. So every day the teacher made a point of announcing to the class that I was the one and only student to still not have his report card turned in. At this point it was getting kind of embarrassing but I couldn't tell her it had been eaten by our dog. She would never believe that! So after about 3 weeks, she calls me out in the hall and asks me why I still hadn't turned it in. At this point I figured the jig was up so I finally fessed up and told her about my dog eating my report card. At first she had this stern expression on her face and I knew I was gonna hear about it. Then all of a sudden she says, your mom called and told me about your dog and then she just burst out laughing. She told me that in all of her years, no one had ever had their dog eat their report card and that this was definitely her

Haybucks's picture

Poor little doggy doo, off to turd heaven.

If the world comes to an end, I want to be in Cincinnati. Everything comes there ten years later. -  Mark Twain


mshaf's picture

You should have shipped the blanket to him with the " M " spelled out in dog turds

nfischer's picture

Great story and you're correct. I did have a big grin on my face reading it.  Thanks for sharing.

ChillitownBuck30's picture


“Show class, have pride, and display character. If you do, winning takes care of itself.”