Devin Gardner Comforted by Thought Zach Boren Still Watches over Him from Somewhere

By The Fake Lantern on November 24, 2013 at 10:54p
13 Comments
Like an angel watching over him.

ANN ARBOR, MI – Nearly one year after Zach Boren left the world of college football for a better, more lucrative place, Michigan quarterback Devin Gardner spoke on behalf of the rival player he had become so close to while playing at Michigan.

Speaking from the heart, the Wolverine wide receiver or quarterback or whatever opened up about his connection to Boren, even after the Buckeye great had passed on to NFL free agency.

"I know he's gone, and that eventually my own eligibility will expire too, but I like to think he's still out there somewhere, standing menacingly over my crumpled, defeated frame at the brink of a taunting penalty," said an emotional Devin Gardner, a single tear streaming down his face. "I've never been closer to someone than Zach was to me, or at least not on top of me like that."

Following that admission, Gardner lost control of his heavy heart and allowed the tears to flow, finally and clearly expressing that the pain left by Boren was still very, very real.

After a few moments, Gardner regained his composure before making one final statement while wiping the tears from his eyes. "I do believe there's football after college football," concluded an introspective Gardner, nodding several times as he paused in silence. "But not for me. Not for me."


The Fake Lantern is the fake student voice of The Ohio State University. You should follow them on Twitter: @TheFakeLantern.

13 Comments

Comments

Youngbuck85's picture

Best account on twitter

Seattle Linga's picture

Devin will not only be seeing Boren this weekend but he will get a chance to meet Mt. Bosa for the very first time. In fact, you'll be looking up a lot at Mt. Bosa on Saturday.
 

Blackbeards Delight's picture

How about Mt. Washington and Joey da "BOSSA"

Crunchy Peanut Butter Bitches.

- Me

 

Boxley's picture

How about Bennet, Spence and Shazier and likely Roby as well. What a great game day he is going to have!
Yummmmmmmmyyyyy......................

"...the man who really counts in the world is the doer, not the mere critic-the man who actually does the work, even if roughly and imperfectly, not the man who only talks or writes about how it ought to be done." President T. Roosevelt

southernstatesbuckeye's picture

Yes, Mr. Gardner, there is football after college.
And for you, it can be bought at your favorite video game store.
 

Statutoryglory's picture

There's a very good chance that after an entire game of getting pounded by our DL, Gardner has to be carted off in a Boren Brothers Dumpster.  It would only be fitting.
 
http://www.borenbrothers.com/#!

BeijingBucks's picture

I actually was caught off guard having lunch when I read this title. After I was able to regain my composure and remove the fatburger chunk my snort of laughter managed to lodge into my sinus cavity and wipe away the induced tears with a napkin swapped in fry grease (oh! Dear Lord!!) the pain!!  I feel like a Michigan fan!!!) ... Somehow managed to finish the rest of the article.  
Hate! Hate! Hate! Love it.

 

 

None can love freedom heartily, but good men; the rest love not freedom, but license. ~ John Milton

buckskin's picture

This year it will Ryan Damn Shazier standing over Devin!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Buckeyeneer's picture

But not for me. Not for me.

Amazing

"Because the rules won't let you go for three." - Woody Hayes

THE Ohio State University

flipbuckeye's picture

This is so... so glorious. 

Grayskullsession's picture

'Twas the night before "The Game" when all through the dorms
Not a Michigan coach was sleeping, not even Al Borges
The helmets worn tight on their heads with fear
Dreading the time when St. Meyer would be here
Brady Hoke was nestled with his donuts all snug in his bed
While visions of Zach Boren danced in Gardner's head
 

"if irony were made of strawberries, we' d all be drinking a lot of smoothies right now."

Boxley's picture

When up on the roof there arose such a clatter,
It was the Scum O, torn to a tatter.

"...the man who really counts in the world is the doer, not the mere critic-the man who actually does the work, even if roughly and imperfectly, not the man who only talks or writes about how it ought to be done." President T. Roosevelt

BeijingBucks's picture

A futile attempt by the UM Oline in disarray
to not be the only thing shredded on that fateful day...
sadly their voodoo could bring them no rest
as their nightmare remained of a  Silver Bullets sack fest!

 

 

None can love freedom heartily, but good men; the rest love not freedom, but license. ~ John Milton