Braxton Miller: 6th Hottest Player in College Football

September 12, 2013 at 12:23p    by DJ Byrnes    
58 Comments
Must be that sweet cut that gives teen girls the woozies.

Seventeen magazine, which apparently has miraculously avoided the affliction rippling through the print industry, has named Braxton Miller the sixth hottest guy in college football.  (Because Alabama is a tyrant, AJ McCarron and CJ Mosley checked in at one and two. #ROLLDAMNTIDE.) Of the Buckeyes' signal caller, whom Seventeen incorrectly lists as a senior (ONE MORE YEAR, BRAXTON! ONE MORE YEAR!) Seventeen says this:

Braxton set a school record last year for the most yards rushed. We think he deserves a school record for hotness!

Ok then, fair enough. Congratulations to Braxton Miller on winning what will undoubtedly be the most prestigious award of his footballing career.


Comments

RoyMunson's picture

Next month's issue will feature an investigative piece about the illegal, artificial enhancements of the players' appearances.

Earle's picture

Far be it from me to argue with a magazine targeted to teenage girls, but they clearly didn't see him during his yellow mohawk phase.

Just say no to italics abuse.

dan_isaacs's picture

Nor are they aware that Aaron Craft goes to the same school as Braxton.  Sorry Brax, but you're fighting for second place.

Dan Isaacs

CanadianBuckeye's picture

Obligatory "No Homo", but is it just me or is AJ McCarron just a goofy looking dude?  I am comfortable enough with my sexuality to judge another mans looks, and I just don't see the attraction in the dude.  Just sayin'...

Denny's picture

The 'no homo' wasn't obligatory.

Taquitos.

CanadianBuckeye's picture

So sensitive around here...
My apologies for using an overstated quip that may offend any.

Scott's picture

Apology accepted.
 

Class of 2008

ScarletNGrey01's picture

Yeah, not cool, but in fairness, everyone here must admit we make fun of Canadians too.  Anyway, as far as McCarron goes, I predict that once he gets out of college and it soon becomes apparent he will not play in the NFL, his girlfriend (who Brent Musburger infamously gushed over) will drop him like a hot potato.

The will to win is not as important as the will to prepare to win. -- Woody Hayes

Orlando Pancakes's picture

I just don't understand the hate (judging by the downvotes) for CanadianBuckeye. What's up 11W members? Instead of also downvoting me can someone explain it to me? I am seriously just wanting to know why he was downvoted since nobody has said why yet. Thanks in advance.
Edit: Is it the "no homo" comment? That is standard where I come from and I have 3 gay friends. I thought that was a common (and definitely cool) slang if that is it.

Buckeyeneer's picture

I am pretty certain it is the "no homo" comment. Just because it is common doesn't make it less insensitive. It used to be common to call black men "boy" or drop n-bombs without a thought. I didn't downvote, but I am answering your question.

"Because the rules won't let you go for three." - Woody Hayes

THE Ohio State University

CanadianBuckeye's picture

It was that comment, and you hit the nail on the head with the explanation.  It is common but that doesn't make it any less disrespectful.  Like I stated above I am sorry to any I may have offended.  11w doesn't need that kind of commenting no matter how harmless the intent may be.
I got an email from a staff member explaining and they were extremely cool about it in their explanation and I fully support anyone who wants to downvote me as my comment was ignorant.  I just didn't think the comment through before putting it out to the world to see.  I am glad to see the staff cares so much about keeping everything friendly on the site.
Cheers to all.

Earle's picture

Canadians are so nice.

Wait, is that an offensive stereotype?

Just say no to italics abuse.

Orlando Pancakes's picture

Haha. Thanks to all for the explanation. I personally don't think it's insensitive, HOWEVER, I can see how it could be to some people so thanks. Canadians really are super nice.

Buckeyeneer's picture

Canadian, you get upvotes from me for handling this the right way. So many posters write something and instead of saying, "Yeah, I see how that could be interpreted badly." they try defend, deflect and even meltdown. I have made some ill advised comments on this site over the years and when I do the community lets me know, I take my medicine, apologize for any offense and move on. Good on you for taking the criticism constructively.

"Because the rules won't let you go for three." - Woody Hayes

THE Ohio State University

tennbuckeye19's picture

Dear Lord, Why did I click on that link... I think the word hot was used about a thousand times on that list.
Spoiler alert: The list is mostly quarterbacks, including Johnny Football, but they also tossed in a kicker and punter or two. SO HOT!!!

Earle's picture

There's nothing hotter than winning the field position battle

--Jim Tressel

Just say no to italics abuse.

yrro's picture

Obviously they just grabbed the first ten google image search results for "NCAA player" and wrote an article about them.
Manziel? Dude has the most punchable face I have ever seen. Obvious troll is obvious.

tennbuckeye19's picture

I don't know. If there's anything I learned from high school and college to some extent, for whatever reason, hot chicks seem to really love themselves some dudes who major in douchebaggery and possess punchable faces.

Alice in Aggieland's picture

Manziel? Dude has the most punchable face I have ever seen.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Dude looks like a Muppet.

Bolt's picture

Did they at least spell it correct? Hawt.

Jack Fu's picture

NOW THE FORBIDDEN FRUIT MUST BE TASTED.

Hovenaut's picture

Seems weird to read about Buckeyes in the realm of teen idolness.

I mean, what's next, Greg Oden becomes a Belieber?

Wait a sec.....

I am not very smart, but I recognize that I am not very smart.

d1145fresh's picture

School record for hotness?!?! Umm has Seventeen magazine ever heard of Aaron Craft? Swoon

jeremytwoface's picture

Even though he doesn't play college football, Aaron Craft should still be around 4th in the "Hottest College Football" vote. #Swoon #ManCrush #Bromance

The first man gets the ((((Oyster)))), the second man gets the shell.

Alice in Aggieland's picture

Crafty ain't got time for Seventeen. He prefers to make the ladies of Cosmo swoon.

OSUNeedles's picture

I know my wife never got too upset about watching a game when Sanzenbacher was involved...

Unky Buck's picture

Let's be honest though...Seventeen is no Tiger Beat...

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tennbuckeye19's picture

Yikes. Chachi, what are you wearing, a doily?

Unky Buck's picture

Apparently Charles wasn't in charge of picking his clothes at that point...

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Poison nuts's picture

Joni loves that sweater...

"Do not pass me, just slow down - I can move right through you" Superchunk - Precision Auto.

tennbuckeye19's picture

Who are we kidding, that sweater probably is Joni's.

Earle's picture

I thought Joanie loved tschotskes.

Just say no to italics abuse.

Unky Buck's picture

Maybe that's why the Charles in Charge sweater budget was $200,000. Nicole Eggert was drawn to the show by the siren songs of those sweaters...

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Alpo's picture

1979 was quite a year apparently! Oh how Scott Baio wishes that cover shoot never happened...Certainly not in charge!

FitzBuck's picture

Scott B is a man.  He's forty.  

Fitzbuck | Toledo - Ohio's right armpit | "A troll by any other name is still a troll".

AndyVance's picture

Let me help you there, Buck... Here's the cover you were looking for:

Unky Buck's picture

Well, I didn't want to excessively promote how awesome I am. I thought I'd give young Scotty some props even though he doesn't even hold a candle to me...

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Earle's picture

There's just something about men in hats...

Just say no to italics abuse.

Unky Buck's picture

That's another thing that Scotty doesn't know...

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Denny's picture

PAWWWWWLLLL, BRAXTON WAS ROBBD

Taquitos.

Alice in Aggieland's picture

Funny there was no mention of McCarron's completely embarrassing chest tat.

hail2victors9's picture

Johnny Footbaww's goofy mug made this list.  I'm canceling my subscription to Seventeen, as we speak.

Those who stay will be CHAMPIONS!

~Bo Schembechler

Squirrel Master's picture

and people say its creepy when a 40 year old fan gushes over a recruit, but pimping out pictures of above age men to little girls is pretty creepy too!
 

I saw a UFO once.......it told me to have a goodyear!

Boomcat's picture

This is.....weird.

Jdadams01's picture

I would love to be in the locker room when the team discovers this.

OSULax13's picture

What a stud muffin. He's my #1 for sure

Leanenaud's picture

That's some borderline NSFW shit right there. Dayum!

AirForceNUT's picture

Where in the world did you get this? Hahah

ScarletNGrey01's picture

I see none of the writers wanted to take credit for this, hence the byline "By 11W Staff".  Good decision.

The will to win is not as important as the will to prepare to win. -- Woody Hayes

Unky Buck's picture

In all fairness, I believe it almost always says 11W Staff at the top of a Buckshot, but if you look in your tracker where you comment, it says DJ put it up.

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BSTP DeCon's picture

He didn't break the record for most yards rushed last year, nor has he this year...

BSTP DeCon's picture

I wish they made an exception to allow McCarron's mom in this poll (; lol

Toilrt Paper's picture

Braxton is a father.

ChicagoBuckeye33's picture

I AM RAGING OVER THE FACT THAT JACK MEWHORT WAS EXCLUDED FROM THIS LIST
Nothing hawter than 350 pound gingers.