Iowa Gives Jim Delany a Wooden Chair

August 22, 2013 at 10:33a    by Jason Priestas    
46 Comments
This is why you punt from the 38, Iowa.

Jim Delany, in his 25th year as Big Ten Commissioner, is traveling to schools with the BTN Bus Tour, receiving gifts from each school along the way. When he was in Columbus, Ohio State presented him with a helmet featuring 25 Buckeye Leafs. Delany was in Iowa City today and Iowa, well Iowa...

This is why you punt from the 38, Iowa.


Comments

IBleedSandG's picture

Well, I don't blame them for swaying away from a football related gift because, well, they suck.

"You pick up the rifle and go as hard as you can possibly go."
-UFM

Oyster's picture

Actually that is all they can afford, due to somebody with a bloated contract that they can't afford to buy out.

GoldenBuckeye's picture

Woah, where did you collect so much gratuitous Iowa hate?  

IBleedSandG's picture

I don't hate Iowa. Just stating facts.

"You pick up the rifle and go as hard as you can possibly go."
-UFM

ChicagoBuckeye33's picture

He is just living vicariously through Delany, who must be pissed as hell.
"This is what I get for getting your sorry asses into two major bowl games by bending over backwards for the BCS? A damn chair? You didn't even bake me an apple pie with an envelope full of money in the box like the construction guy did for the warden of Shawshank..."
It's like a metaphor, because Delany is like a prison warden in the sense that he imprisons 13 crappy teams every year and makes it clear that even if they win their division, Ohio State is still waiting in Indy with a baton, with the command "On your feet!".
 

theDuke's picture

this is the funniest thing I've seen in a looong time!  

theDuke

buckeyeEddie27's picture

A chair?  
Who's brain child was this?  
Why not a Longaberger basket too?
Iowa Sucks.
 

I know there's a game Saturday, and my ass will be there.

BED's picture

Because Longaberger is a Newark, Ohio business.

The Ohio State University, College of Arts & Sciences, Class of 2006
The Ohio State University Moritz College of Law, Class of 2009

Oyster's picture

It's Nerk, just sayin.

buckeyeEddie27's picture

alright.
why not some cheesy, locally made, overpriced, useless basket too?
better?

I know there's a game Saturday, and my ass will be there.

cajunbuckeye's picture

That's not even an Iowa chair! I'll bet money it was made in Holmes County, Ohio.

An angry fan...rooting for an angry team...led by angry coaches

BTwrestle04's picture

An ear of corn would have been better.

droessl's picture

Why not just give him a gift certificate to the general store and let him pick out his own gift from 1898? 

Squirrel Master's picture

Maybe it was his favorite chair everytime he went there to visit them? I doubt it but that is the only thing I can think of .
AT LEAST GIVE HIM A ROCKING CHAIR! HE'S GOING TO NEED IT ONCE HE TURNS THE B1G INTO THE GREATEST CONF.....hmmm

I saw a UFO once.......it told me to have a goodyear!

Unky Buck's picture

It was a chair or some corn. Not much else going on there.

...

Colin's picture

I'm a little surprised they haven't yet figured out how to manufacture furniture from corn.

ArTbkward's picture

Especially since South Dakota figured out how to make an entire palace.

We should strive to keep thy name, of fair repute and spotless fame...
(Also, I'm not a dude)

Oyster's picture

The worst part about this is that there is no way he can even consider Re Gifting it! 

teddyballgame's picture

no sioux city birch beer?  

NW Buckeye's picture

I would think it is a chair from the Amana Colonies.  They specialize in hand crafted furniture.  These chairs retail for over $500 each.  Either that, or they went down to Wally world and picked up a cheap immitation!!  

ArTbkward's picture

They could have gave him a B1G Coach of the Year award, they have a few to spare.

We should strive to keep thy name, of fair repute and spotless fame...
(Also, I'm not a dude)

OSUStu's picture

Ferentz: "Now if you look here Jim, the chair has one spindle for every passing touchdown we had last year."

Delany:  "Yes, I see that.  And one leg for every win."

If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.  ~ Bruce Lee

cajunbuckeye's picture

You can drop the bat and take a slow jog around the bases. That's a homerun in any ballpark.

An angry fan...rooting for an angry team...led by angry coaches

OSUStu's picture

Haha.  Thank you sir.

If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.  ~ Bruce Lee

ChicagoBuckeye33's picture

And a seat for every big game we have won for this conference since 1998.

sharkvsghost's picture

that chair is actually made out of the cartilage of iowa running backs.

swing hard in case you hit it.

4thandinches's picture

Gave him a chair to watch their games because he sure ain't going to be standing in excitement. 

I wasn't born a Buckeye but I became one as fast as I could. 

BSTP DeCon's picture

Looks incredibly uncomfortable. Well, at least he has some extra firewood for his next camping trip or something. Nice Iowa, nice! 

Run_Fido_Run's picture

The gift was symbolic.
Delany's been warning Ferentz that his mediocirty cannot continue. So, Ferentz brought out his favorite old wooden chair and said, "Look, Jim, I've gone 11-12 the last two years while being the 6th highest paid coach in college football and yet . . . . here, feel right here . . . my seat is not even warm."

Oyster's picture

This thread is officially closed!
Jason, please turn off the reply buttons, thanks.

droessl's picture

To OSUSTU, SHARKVSGHOST, RUN_FIDO_RUN, and 4THANDINCHES:

Well played, gentlemen! 

GoBucks713's picture

They stole AIRBHG's chair and decided to give it to the Mad Scientist, Jim Delaney.

-The Aristocrats!

OSUAndy07's picture

"But I'm tryin' Ringo. I'm tryin', real hard, to be the shepherd"

unholy bucknut's picture

Iowa had to buy that chair from a yard sale because they pay Ferentz so much.

Knarcisi's picture

Maybe they should give back one of the COY awards that were gifted to them.

ChicagoBuckeye33's picture

I feel like Delany would rather have gotten the 2011 Orange Bowl trophy with the original oranges still in it.  
Or a small bottle of Adrenochrome (or whatever that fake Fear and Loathing drug was called) taken straight from the brain of Drew Tate during one of his on-field rages he so maturely put on display against OSU in 2005 and 2006.

ChicagoBuckeye33's picture

The gold plating on the back reads: "Jim, the only way we can get Kirk out of here before his contract runs out is in one of the following ways: 1) He is assassinated by a clandestine CIA task force in a measure to protect national security, or 2) Revelations comes true, literally from the text, except Kirk is actually the Second Coming.  He actually insisted on that one being put in the contract.  Any way you could make either of these things happen?  We would sure have a LOT of freed up money if one of them did, and who knows where it would end up...  Sincerely and with much hope, The Board of Regents, University of Iowa"

acBuckeye's picture

"But at least it's a practical gift that Delany can actually use, unlike a stupid helmet!!"
- Iowa fans

ChicagoBuckeye33's picture

They're right.  He can always break the crap outta that chair and use it for wood at a bonfire.

pjtobin's picture

It was either a chair or a bean bag. They were both left in a dorm room. They must have flipped a coin. 

Bury me in my away jersey, with my buckeye blanket. A diehard who died young. Rip dad.