Friday Skull Session

By Elika on February 15, 2013 at 6:00a

Mornin', Sunshine!

I was going to start by asking about your Valentine's Day, but let's be honest, who cares? Instead, I'm going to tell you about the dream I had Monday night, because it's still bothering me that I can't figure out what it means, and I'm hoping you might be of some assistance in the comments section, since you all get off topic on Fridays anyway. Again, nobody cares about my dream either, but I'm sticking with Plan B. Either go with it, or skip to the first topic and collect $200, or something like that.

So, the dream: I was going out of town somewhere, I don't remember why or exactly where, but I do believe it was south of the Mason-Dixon line and relatively middle-of-nowhere. As I head to my destination, I do some online research to find out where I absolutely must eat in this hot spot I'm heading to. The evidence is pretty clear, as there's a place with hundreds of rave reviews of these must-have sandwiches. How could I pass this oasis up?

Further investigation shows this place sells out of sandwiches pretty early in the day, but you can place an order online the night before (way to go, SEC Country!). A sandwich I can go to bed dreaming about? Sold. I place my online order, go to sleep, and can not wait for this life-altering sandwich experience that awaits me. I arrive to this place, tell the morbidly obese, toothless guy behind the counter I'm there to pick up my order. And then, he breaks the news to me: my sandwich is gone. They lost it, or sold it, or something, but they don't have it. Which means I went to bed dreaming about a nonexistent sandwich. 

I'm pretty level headed, but this ish doesn't fly with me (e.g. Don't wait until I order short rib to tell me you're out of it, moron!). I insist they owe me a sandwich of my dreams. The guy doesn't understand why I'm freaking out on him, but he checks and sees they have one sandwich left. It's not the sandwich I ordered, but I can buy it. I ask what it is, and he shows it to me. Admittedly, I don't remember what was in the sandwich, other than bacon and jalapeno poppers (my two weaknesses), but I can tell you, this sandwich was HUGE. Like Man v. Food challenge huge. 

We both look at the sandwich, me with lust in my eyes. I'm sold, I tell him I'll take it. "Now, wait just a minute," he says. He looks me up and down, looks back at the sandwich, and adds, "I don't think I can sell you this here sandwich." I'm about to ask if it's because my ancestors come from a place a bit too sandy for his liking, but he says, "you won't be able to finish it. It'll go to waste. I can't sell it to you." 

WHAT?! Yes, I can finish the sandwich! And what business is it of his if I can finish it or not? I argued, I begged, I yelled, I pleaded, I cried (probably, I totally would if the sandwich looked good enough), but he wouldn't sell it to me. I stormed off, probably insisting I was going to call the police.

Now: A) Apologies, because I don't know why I made you read through all that, if you didn't happen to skip to the first topic. B) But WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? Please tell me! C) NOW I get the SEC hate.

DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK. As if honoring Jim Tressel, after the Buckeyes' scare against Northwestern Thursday night, Aaron Craft said, "Every time we play these guys, it’s a grind." And a grind, it was. Northwestern was looking to get its first win over Ohio State in Columbus since 1977, and the Buckeyes were looking to avoid a three-game losing streak, following their OT loss to Michigan and beatdown by Indiana. 

Northwestern's defense came out strong, holding Thomas to just five points in the first half. The teams went into the locker room at halftime tied at 30. Things didn't appear to be going much better in the second half, as the Buckeyes were down five with just under nine minutes to play. Eventually, the Buckeyes were able to turn things around a bit. They played defense, Thomas got to the free throw line, and the team rallied together, which will hopefully serve them well moving forward.

“This is all me growing up. Knowing when the shots aren’t falling, I’ll have guys give it to me in the right spots,” Thomas said. “I just have to be patient. For a player like me you have to be patient on the offensive end. I just did the little things to try and help my teammates win.”

While the Buckeyes eventually pulled away, the game wasn't nearly as comfortable as the score would indicate, and likely had most Buckeye hoops fans frustrated all night. Two major highlights, though, were Thad Matta getting his 150th home win at Ohio State and Sam Thompson's 360 dunk:

CLUB TRIL. Ohio's favorite benchwarmer placed Ohio State at the number ten spot in his latest Top 12 NCAA Power Rankings. After a bit of a love letter to college basketball, gushing over how fantastic this season has been (which despite some Buckeye struggles, I tend to agree), Titus went on to relive the absolute butt-kicking that the Wolverines endured at the hands of their little brother Spartans on Tuesday night:

Michigan State dominated every facet of the game and nobody on Michigan outside of maybe Trey Burke seemed to care. Case in point: Matt Costello had twice as many points as Glenn Robinson III and Tim Hardaway Jr. combined. I'll say it again, this time in italics and with an exclamation point on the end of the sentence to really drive the point home: Matt Costello — a kid averaging five minutes and just over one point per game — scored twice as many points as two first-round draft picks, Glenn Robinson III and Tim Hardaway Jr., combined! 

Titus eventually went on to point out that the remainder of Michigan's schedule should prove to be much easier to handle, and that they do have boatloads of talent on that team, but remains skeptical, as it is "impossible to ignore that Michigan currently lacks heart, toughness, leadership, or whatever other intangibles prevent teams from getting curb-stomped."

And, on to the good stuff, Ohio State. Titus' latest rankings came out before the win over Northwestern, so they're based on the Buckeyes' schedule right through that two-game losing streak against the Wolverines and the Hoosiers. Titus remains cautiously optimistic, pointing out that Indiana is the best team in the country, the Hoosiers were playing their minds out on Sunday, and that the Buckeyes got into foul trouble early on, suffering all game as a result. However:

At the same time, Sunday was a reality check. It dashed Ohio State's Big Ten title hopes and proved that the Buckeyes still have a lot to work on if they hope to book a ticket to Atlanta and the Final Four in April.


GETTING ALL ATWITTER. Ohio State wide receivers coach Zach Smith raised some eyebrows yesterday with the following tweet:

Though Smith seems to joke around and have fun on his Twitter account most of the time, often poking fun at Mark Pantoni for his Justin Bieber love, he did begin some speculation as to what he could be referring to. A year from now is likely too soon for any major expansion to be complete, but perhaps they could be installing long-anticipated lights in the Shoe. Particularly with more night games in the future, it would make sense to not have to bring in lighting for every night game.

Or maybe he's just setting up another Pantoni/Bieber Valentine's Day joke, a year in advance.

URBZ. The Crystal Ball Run began a series this week, evaluating college football's first-year head coaches from 2012, which includes your beloved Urban Meyer. As would be expected, following a turnaround of a sub .500 team to a 12-0 run, CBR gave Urban Meyer an 'A' for his first year on the job.

Among things they cited as examples for what went right for Ohio State under Urban's direction were: going undefeated (duh), the improvement of Braxton Miller as a QB and as a leader, the effectiveness of Carlos Hyde, knowing his personnel *cough* Bollman *cough*, and the influence the coaching must have had in the Buckeyes winning so many games that looked to be close calls.

As far as things that had gone wrong in Urban's first year, and this won't come as a surprise to any Buckeye fans, they really were only able to nitpick on the struggles of the defense. They also suggested the lack of a "Percy Harvin" player on the team as a concern, but admitted they were just being picky by throwing that in there, despite the undefeated season.

One thing I did take issue with, however, was calling Ohio State a team that "that arguably would've gotten destroyed by the likes of Alabama or any other high level team they could've faced in the post-season." Ok, Alabama, I won't argue. But in all likelihood, had the Buckeyes been postseason eligible, they would have ended up playing Notre Dame. Would it have pissed off the entire country? Probably, but it's true. Would Notre Dame have destroyed Ohio State? Heck. No. (And I would've told you that before they played Alabama.)

A LITTLE BIT OF THIS, AND A LITTLE BIT OF THAT. This is just so full of win... Whoa! to this... I seriously thought this was a joke (Warning, you'll hate me for making you watch it... but please tell me it IS a joke!)... In honor of Valentine's Day, the greatest love song ever (Warning: Song may cause NSFW behavior)... The most Darren Rovell tweet of all time... Just a reminder, J.J. Watt is 6'5" and 295 lbs... About as adorable as Aaron Craft... Who wants to go on a cruise?!?!?

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