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PHONE'S RINGING -- IT'S URBAN ON THE LINE

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Photo Caption: Hate Week Style

Jim Tressel giving a lesson on class

With hate week in full effect, we thought it best to give you all a chance to show your wit via another prize-free caption contest.

I'll defer to the experts but I can't help but wonder if I just saw Tress whisper, "Hey, Dick, I regret to inform you of this but I've never lost a recruit to a dude sporting a leather collar and sleeves."

Comments

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jtbucks on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:07pm #

Tress: "But no seriously, I know you think its funny, but sniffing my jock every november is no way to land those big recruits, just an fyi."

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A Bag of Doritos on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:08pm #

you may want to borrow the carhart jacket on the guy walking through the door. you know, class your outfit up just a little bit.

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Joe Scarlet on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:09pm #

"Heeeeyyyyy, come on Jimmy. Just a few dollars. Come on man. I got this sweet business proposition. I can't lose. PROMISE I'll pay you back. ... No, seriously, snake oil man. I'm telling you, it's awesome."

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buckinnc on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:10pm #

"I told them that I understood the Rivalry because I have an "I hate Ohio State button" on my desk and they bought it. Can you believe that? At this rate you will even up the Rivalry in no time.

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jtbucks on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:10pm #

Ok...Just One More: Tress "Seriously, did you just shart your pants, its no laughing matter. "

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Jason on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:10pm #

"Rich, no question all those little dudes you recruit will pan out in the Big Ten. Your decided pipsqueakatic advantage is going to give us fits."

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Sam on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:11pm #

"Well, Rich. You know what this means. Ass-kickings. Lots and lots of ass-kickings, and so forth. Nothing personal."

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Scott K on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:15pm #

"Welcome to the Big 10 Rich. Prepare to be owned. Oh, and buy the way, you're WAY to country, and that ain't how TP rolls..."

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Clown Baby on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:22pm #

"You mean you still recruit defensive players Jim? HaHaHa"

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Boom and Zoom on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:22pm #

RichRod: "I have this grin, because I just bought some really good tweed off the guy behind us!"
JT: "That will explain it in a couple of years."

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Clown Baby on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:22pm #

"Hey Jim, mind holding onto these workout logs for me?"

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WbP on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:22pm #

Well, you know, that's a nice enough offense you got there Dick, but amateur hour is over. Why don't you take that read option back to the Big East where it belongs.

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Clown Baby on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:25pm #

"Smell that Jim?"

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Kansas City Buckeye on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:31pm #

Rich: Can I see your Championship ring again, pretty please???
Coach Tressel: Ok, once more and that is it.

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Brian on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:40pm #

Well Rich, I sure hate to put you in the unemployment line after this one, but Pryor and my boys are going to put a real ass kicking on you and so forth.

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BuckNut on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:41pm #

Tress: "Can you believe people think I am interested in anything you say."
RichRod: "Hell I am not interested in anything I say."

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Eric on 19 Nov 2009 - 5:59pm #

Rich- ".... and then he said 'I promise i'll get my seniors to a bowl game.' Haha... oh to be young and stupid."

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Bobby on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:01pm #

Listen Jim, I have no friggin' clue what a Michigan Man is. BUT, I do have this new offense that's going to put the Big 10 on notice!

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matt in cleveland on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:18pm #

tressel: looking in his coat handing something to him states, "red toyota 2nd row"
dickrod: "i ain't one of those fancy valets"
tressel: "give it a year"
dickrod: "whats that mean, we have a rivalry or something while i was cleaning some guys desk found this "beet ohio state" button" beat spelled wrong scum spelling classes
tressel: "you sure are dumb and smelly and for christ sake buy a suit or trade even up that new members only jacket with one of the bums that enhabit that thing you call a campus"
dickrod: finally realizing he is graced in the presence of greatness "yes sir"
tressel: "thats better, dont worry i will have the second teamers in sometime in the 3rd"
dickrod: "thanks"
tressel: "no problem, now go get my toyota"
dickrod: after getting tressel's car and recieving proper "tip anything else?"
tressel: "stay out of the cat box!!! stay out of the catbox!"

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Mike on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:18pm #

Listen to me son. It's not your fault... It's not your fault... It's not your fault...

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buckinnc on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:22pm #

take two:

RR: So I tell the swamp donkey to sock it before I give her a trunky in the tradesman's entrance and have her lick me yarbles!

JT: Wow! You West Virgina hillbillies are something else.

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RBuck on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:31pm #

JT (being a gentleman): "Nobody else in this league repects you and I hate to say that I don't either".

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southbaybuckeye on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:33pm #

JT "Remember Rich, always address your superiors with the salutation "sir""

RR "Yes sir, it won't happen again sir"

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BuckeyeSki on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:40pm #

DickRod: "So Jimmy, what do you think, you wanna borrow my wife for the night?! $150....cemmmm onnn!"

JT: Ehhhhhh......gonna have to pass Dick, how do you sleep with that hair?

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southbaybuckeye on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:41pm #

"what is that intoxicating smell?"

"I have cats"

"meowwwww"

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Bobby on 19 Nov 2009 - 6:45pm #

"Jim, let me tell you what Barwis did to me next..."

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KJB on 19 Nov 2009 - 7:01pm #

Rich: I'm guaranteed to get TP. I've got sex panther on tonight. 60% of the time it works every time!

JT: Smells like a turd covered in burnt hair.

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Brian on 19 Nov 2009 - 7:08pm #

Well hell Dick you sure don't like Mexican

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Miguel on 19 Nov 2009 - 8:11pm #

"Rich, I'm going to stand here and piss on your shoes. And you're going to like it."

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southbaybuckeye on 19 Nov 2009 - 8:12pm #

smells like a diaper full of Indian food

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BuckeyeSki on 19 Nov 2009 - 8:13pm #

IT SMELLS LIKE BIGFOOTS DICK!

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southbaybuckeye on 19 Nov 2009 - 8:14pm #

i was hoping someone would follow with that. you never let me down. haha

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Jangs78 on 19 Nov 2009 - 8:21pm #

Tress: "And that, son, is how the game is played. Now get your goofy, dumpy imbred ass out of this gym cuz Pryor is ours!"

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buckrific on 19 Nov 2009 - 9:03pm #

"Hey Rich, Welcome to the B10. I sent your wife a lovely cheetah skinned outfit. Maybe she can wear it when you get introduced as coach."

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iball on 19 Nov 2009 - 9:18pm #

RR: "20 hours a week? You gotta be shittin' me!"

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Ultrabuckeyehomer on 19 Nov 2009 - 9:23pm #

JT: "We'll to be honest Rich, I've never really been in that position before. You should talk to Zook."

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Jfunk on 19 Nov 2009 - 9:41pm #

Well golly gee there Rich. I know you and your boys and all those fine seniors you have are just gonna come out and give 100%. But I'll tell you one thing, I bet this here rivarly makes that one you had with Pitt look like a mouse fart in a huricane.

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OHIOinME on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:01pm #

"I hear you got a lucky nut in you pocket. What does it take for a guy like me to rub up on it."

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OHIOinME on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:10pm #

I take that back. Judging of the facial expressions. I think Tressel is hiding a baseball bat. "......what give me joy...Baseball....teamwork..."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...

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Kalamazoo Steve on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:12pm #

JT: "A douche bag says what?"

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Kalamazoo Steve on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:16pm #

HA!

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poe mcknoe on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:22pm #

"You've talked to Lloyd, I'm sure. So you know how this is going to go."

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poe mcknoe on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:28pm #

Tress: "What's your back up plan if you don't land Terrelle Pryor?"

Rich Rod: "...."

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Ultrabuckeyehomer on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:33pm #

Caption II: So that's why every time Lloyd Carr walks in the room ... Oh, wait. shit. Here he comes, just act natural."

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bup bup bup on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:39pm #

*scene: beside the bleachers at a Big Ten fundraising event at a local high school*

RR: JIIIIIMMMMYYYYY!! how's my ol rival doing?

*fakes punching JT in the gut, laughs it off, rubs JTs head*

run any option recently JUST KIDDING OF COURSE YOU HAVEN'T eh heh heh heh just foolin jimmy nice to see you, how's the family?

JT: hello richard, they're doing just fine, thanks for asking. my youngest just h-

RR: WOW that's great, hey check out this new jacket i got. LEATHER sleeves.

JT: very nice.

RR: the rest of it isn't leather though

JT: yes, i noticed that.

RR: that's what makes it cool.

JT: yes, it's very nice. well, i think it's about tim-

RR: WOAH fuck I AM STARVING, hey do you wanna chilidog before we start here, by the way i saw some coed hotties in the hall, think you can wingman for me? rita's cool with it probably, and damnnnnnn

*RR accidentally hip thrusts in the direction of a small child, who begins crying*

JT: richard this is a high school.

RR: aw i know, it's AWESOME, right?!? anyway: chilidog? you in? out? in? out? in? out? in? out? in? out? in? out?

*JT stares blankly at RR*

RR: ....iiinnnnnnnnnn?

JT: well, m-

RR: out?

JT: well, my wife has been asking me to watch my caloric intake, and really unless the bun is whole wheat i probably shoudn-

RR: PUSSY!! ahahaha you know i love you jim

*RR slaps JT on the back, dislodging his glasses*

RR: anyway i guess we're on, time to do more of this stupid VFW fundraising bullshit or whatever the hell it is. unwed mothers? oh who gives a shit. peace out jimmy.

*RR holds up peace sign, then drops index finger*

RR: YOU OWE ME A CHILI DOG YOU FUCK!!

*RR laughs and runs off*

*JT sighs, adjusts his glasses, and pulls out a small pad of paper which he painstakingly writes something on. he smiles inwardly, but before he can return it to his coat pocket, he's jostled by a member of the crowd. frantically, JT looks for the pad, but alas: it is gone*

~~THREE HOURS LATER~~

*a janitor is cleaning the gym after the event, when he spots a small notepad. opening it up, he finds only one, furiously written phrase inside:

DESTROY
MICHIGAN
FOOTBALL*

fin

Set your avi
Bobby on 19 Nov 2009 - 10:50pm #

Hahaha

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LuvBuck on 20 Nov 2009 - 12:04am #

RR: "You're joking...reallly??"

JT: "Yup it's true, once you hit 50 it all goes downhill."

RR: "Well, how do you get it up again?"

JT: "Usually I just have Ellen stick her finger up my ass..that usually does the trick."

RR: "Ha Ha....."

JT: "I'm serious Rich."

RR: "....."

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David on 20 Nov 2009 - 11:11am #

winner winner, chicken dinner

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Sean on 20 Nov 2009 - 11:21am #

JT: Nice mitten state tuxedo denim Dick
DR: Thanks I got it on sale at the Wal-Mart
JT: I was being facetious Dick
DR: Oh that's a big word, is that like when I said I didn't shred player files at West Virginy
JT: No, that would be a lie.
DR: (Laughs)

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Sean on 20 Nov 2009 - 11:27am #

RR: Well his name, look, and play all are a bit like taint sweat

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GO BLUE on 20 Nov 2009 - 11:30am #

hahahahahaha good one. Tha had to of taken all day. Can you please point me to any proff of RR shredding documents?

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Brian on 20 Nov 2009 - 3:00pm #

Usually Shredding documents means the proof has been destoyed.

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chaoscrusader on 20 Nov 2009 - 3:03pm #

Tress: Do you know why birds fly upside over West Virginia?
Dickrod: No
Tress: There is nothing worth shitting on...
Dickrod: Ya, I know that.. That is why I left.
Tress: I guess if a bird was to take a shit, Michigan is as good as place as any..
Dickrod: What do you mean?
Tress: You are the Bird and the pile of shit is your footabll team. You see the irony in that?

DickRod: What?/?

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A Bag of Doritos on 20 Nov 2009 - 3:05pm #

shhh, you'll confuse him.

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Sean on 21 Nov 2009 - 12:36am #

Well I pissed off a TSUN fan, my work here is done :)

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